Appreciating that everyone's relationships with their parents are different, I tend to find that most grandparents I know do things for their family out of love. So it alarms me that people would 'go nuts' at their parent over cutting a boy's fringe (I'm going to let you in on a little secret, hair grows....) But the point is it alarms me people would 'go nuts' at another adult full stop, especially over something that was meant to help.

Maybe it's because I feel I have nothing to prove when it comes to parenting so don't need to exert such control. Or maybe it's because I welcome a communal approach when it comes to caring for children - anyone remember the recent story about over 600 people ignoring 2 children who were clearly looking lost? And guess who was the only one to stop. Yup, a grandmother.

Read him a story about a boy who cuts his own hair and then ever so accidentally leave him in a room with a pair of scissors.

Read him a story about a boy who cuts his own hair and then ever so accidentally leave him in a room with a pair of scissors.

Don't do it. It is not your child. Mum will realise and cut when it gets too long.

Both my grandsons' hair is a nightmare. Their hair is lank and so long they can't see and it gets in the way when eating, playing, watching screens etc etc It looks frightful, I so empathise with the Granny who wants to sneak away and cut their hair however it is their hair not yours. I pulled out some photos of their father at their age (11 and 15) and his hair was frightful too, I remembered the arguments we had over it and how it always ended with him in high dudgeon and me furious but it never ended with the hair cut. It is obviously a badge of honour or something - leave it, wait until they are 25 and then they will have their hair all shaved off and that is frightful too! Just enjoy their company and ignore their hair.

If you don't want to ever be left alone with him again, sure go ahead! He is not your child, you have no right to cut his hair. You would be seen as interfering and disrespectful, at best. If you have to do something tie it back with hair tie. You had your children and raised them as you wished, it is their turn now. My in-laws did the same to my sons hair, I love them, but it took a lot for me to get past that. I felt it was a complete invasion of boundaries and a first haircut is very special, plus it looked awful. Stay away from the hair and keep a good respectful relationship instead.

If my MIL cut my son's hair without consulting me I would go nuts. The only opportunity we have to do what we want (within reason) is with are kids. And when I have grandchildren I will just have to grin and bear the parent's decisions

As a doting grandma of 10 gorgeous grandchildren, I have learned the "grandma's zip". It is used on the mouth. I would only open it if circumstances were life threatening! I would use the hair clips when in the park as climbing might indeed be that - but discrete ones purely to save my own embarrassment !

Ha! My Mum gets upset when I cut my son's hair - she'd love him with flowing locks!!!

My boy too has lovely, crazy, curly hair. It's such a part of him I'd be horrified if my in-laws got it cut.
If it really bothers you just clip it back when you're doing stuff together.

I also love my son having long, blonde curls.

And my in-laws also hate it (I think that makes me like it more!!)

Are you my mother/mother in law??!!!

I love my boys having longer hair but I do tend to draw the line when they can't see.... (my husband hates it too but he sucks it up to avoid me then raising the prospect of another baby that might be a girl...!).

But aren't your family very lucky to have such an involved and caring granny? I hope they realise how lucky they are. Even the more hirsute ones!

You have had 'your turn' at the old parenting game and I am sure you did it beautifully, but now it is 'their turn' it really is as simple as that.

When my parents get too involved, I just say these words...'my turn', make of that what you will ; )

Ah ha- wonderful suggestion - i will give the parents the fringe hairbands (home made) and go to Asda for a selection of clips!! Many thanks