Always here to help if you are still looking. Please check my website and get in touch if you would like my support to help you to move forward. Take care, Lulu 
lululuckockcounselling.com

At some point I felt stuck (in my marriage and my life). What worked for me was seeing a psychotherapist. I tried 3 different ones. They often offer the first session for free, but even if they don't those initial sessions can be quite helpful to get the issue and what you need straight.

I would definitely recommend choosing a certified psychotherapist, rather than a life coach. Anyone can call themselves a life coach. Interestingly my certified and highly qualified was cheaper than any of the life coaches I have ever had and definitely a lot better. Expect to pay between £50-75 per hour. Then again, you can be lucky with a life coach.

Check out how to find a good therapist:

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/lifestyle/we ... apist.html
And definitely try finding one via BACP (who register all certified therapists).

Where do you live? is there an amateur theatre near you? they always need people for front of house and all sort of non-acting roles and they don't care who you are, or about your personal circumstances, as long as you can do your bit. Very liberating. I felt like you do in my mid 40s and joined a local theatre.

or simply find somewhere where you can volunteer and make yourself useful. There's nothing like being the person people go to to make you feel good, and it escalates.

It may come as a surprise for some that the feelings are not actually telling you that you are lost and stuck. Feelings cannot be connected to your circumstances. Ever. They may look like it, and with society constantly pushing 'techniques' on us, searching for 'what is making you feel this way', and pressure to be positive actively, keeps us hooked in the cycle, instead of letting us experience the natural ebb and flow of life. So feelings are down... left alone they pop up again.. and then they dip... then they rise - up and down all day long, all perfectly normal, we all do it all the time. So if you happen to be on a down as a thought of feeling lost and stuck comes past, we are encouraged to jump right in and dig around in it, telling ourselves that we shouldn't be feeling this way, another black cloud heaped on, taking us further and further down the rabbit hole.

Another day we are in good spirits and the same thought of feeling lost and stuck comes past. We don't even notice it... and guess what? It passes on by.

Yes, I agree that the answers are all in your head, yet I say 'we DON'T have to get to them.

Happy to chat to anyone interested in looking in the direction that I am pointing.

.

Thank you so much for all your replies. You have given me great ideas of people and places to think about. xxx

Sunnyday,

Sorry for the late reply, but I have just noticed your post and think I have just the thing for you. I know a counsellor by the name of Anna Jezuita of Be In Life Counselling who runs monthly “mindfulness“ sessions. It is exactly for people like you who basically just want a sort of MOT for their mental well-being. I would strongly recommend you get in touch with her, I think the next one she has coming up is in early March. Her phone number 07515 271268.

Thank you both for the recommendations. My website is getting there but in the meantime please do get in touch if I can be of any help - my email is nelsonhenrietta@gmail.com and my phone is 07876 404764. I am still offering very reasonable introductory rates while I set myself up.

Second recommendation for Henrietta Nelson as a Life Coach - was brilliant at moving me on from a challenging work situation and various other "stuff". Likewise found her on this site. Can provide contact details as needs.

Hi Sunnyday

I felt rather as you have described for most of last year, although with alot of depression too. I chose to follow the life coaching route to try and move forwards and it has worked brilliantly.

I saw a lady called Henrietta Nelson, who in fact I found on here, and she was supremely helpful in turning things around for me.

PM me if you'd like further details, but otherwise if you google her you'll find her details should you choose this route.

Good luck with whatever you choose to do.

Hi Sunnyday,

Why don't you pop down to Neal's Yard on Northcote Road. I would be very happy to work with you and see how we can move you out of this rut .

I use coaching, hypnotherapy and Emotional Freedom Technique (tapping) and am in clinic every Monday evening.

Alternatively Sha, who I would also recommend is in on Thursday evenings.

Sometimes it is as simple as talking things through and being able to see them from another perspective. Then, being given the skills to move forwards.

For now what will probably help is just sitting and admitting the truth of your situation to yourself. Then don't distract from it. Naming the worry, concern or issue doesn't make it happen.
All positive change begins with naming what is true. So, allow yourself to do this without immediately trying to find a solution.

Then if you have the time do go and see someone to talk to. Either one of the links above or PM me for further info. Coaching, counselling, hypno, tapping...will all help to get things moving again.

Melanie

Hi SunnyDay

Please feel free to make contact with me if you want. I know the feeling well! Instead of asking outright, like you have, I went off in search of answers that took me down a rabbit hole that lasted 4 years, a lot of heartbreak, stress and drama! I am out the other side thriving, and with a wealth of knowledge that has been an accumulation of trying out various 'self-help' advisors out there. I have found something in the process that is life-changing and for that I am truly grateful. Let's have a conversation and see if you think it could help.

I know this might sound really naff but my friend has been feeling similar and sees a Shaman every fortnight. She absolutely loves her visits and I have seen the changes in her. Might be something worth checking out as it is not anything related to mental health issues.

Hi Annabel,

Thank you for your replying to my post.

The link you sent me is for people suffering with mental health problems, i.e. depression, anxiety, OCD etc. perhaps I wasn't clear in my post. I am not suffering with these types of issues, I am just trying to figure out my next step or my direction in life and looking for someone to talk over my situation with.

Thanks.

I am feeling likewise - though in my case I suspect my impending divorce is the key cause of my 'lost and stuckness'

Last year i saw two different therapists at this place on Abbeville rd - lots of different personalities of therapists so you should find one who suits, it seems a good place to start if you are local.

https://theawarenesscentre.com

Life coach may be better, but I think even 2 or 3 therapy sessions would be a good place to start, I doubt you would regret it. (and don't be afraid to switch therapists if you don't 'gell' with the first one you try)

Good luck