by lalectrice » Sun Sep 04, 2011 7:50 pm
I really sympathise - uncontrollable rage is scary and, ironically, often disempowering. You've made the best first move in identifying that you are experiencing problems and asking for advice. There are two key routes you might find helpful, perhaps the one a GP might first recommend being CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy). This psychological therapy focuses on identifying the triggers for your emotion and trying to help you re-learn how to manage them. It can be very helpful for problems like phobias, specific anxieties and anger management. Many people find it really useful.
In my view, though, only psychotherapy can really help address the root causes of anger and associated problems. Psychotherapy (the so-called 'talking cure') is usually a much longer-term process and involves exploring family dynamics in both your current situation and in the core family relationships that formed the person you are (i.e. relationships with parents, siblings etc.) It can effect profound positive changes in the way you see, understand and manage your feelings about and your responses to people and situations. For example, the fact that your anger really erupted around the birth of your second child suggests that you might be re-visiting unconscious feelings to do with the parent-child dynamic - that between you and your parent(s) as well as that between you and your children.
Unfortunately, getting either CBT or psychotherapy on the NHS is very difficult - a brief course of CBT after a long period on a waiting list is very possible. This does not mean that you should not speak to your GP, though - it sounds as if you feel you are reaching a really difficult point ('it's all getting too much for me') and you might get lucky with a referral as all NHS authorities are different. Speaking about the problem to a sympathetic professional can also be incredibly helpful and will make you feel as if you are taking a step in the right direction.
Anger can be a manifestation of sadness, so it might be worth asking if you think you are depressed. Equally, it can be an expression of powerlessness - do you feel ambialent about being at home with the kids, for e.g.? Are there other problems in your life (conscious or repressed) that might be manifesting in this way? I cannot comment on you situation specifically as I am not a professional and have never met you, but these are just a couple of many possible factors. There is a lot of good support on the internet, and if you are interested in private CBT or psychotherapy (psychodynamic therapy might work well), look at the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy website to find a local, appropriately qualified person.
Good luck - and huge sympathies. It is very hard going through feelings of rage, but you are taking important steps to deal with things in a way that can only be postive for you, your partner and children.
I really sympathise - uncontrollable rage is scary and, ironically, often disempowering. You've made the best first move in identifying that you are experiencing problems and asking for advice. There are two key routes you might find helpful, perhaps the one a GP might first recommend being CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy). This psychological therapy focuses on identifying the triggers for your emotion and trying to help you re-learn how to manage them. It can be very helpful for problems like phobias, specific anxieties and anger management. Many people find it really useful.
In my view, though, only psychotherapy can really help address the root causes of anger and associated problems. Psychotherapy (the so-called 'talking cure') is usually a much longer-term process and involves exploring family dynamics in both your current situation and in the core family relationships that formed the person you are (i.e. relationships with parents, siblings etc.) It can effect profound positive changes in the way you see, understand and manage your feelings about and your responses to people and situations. For example, the fact that your anger really erupted around the birth of your second child suggests that you might be re-visiting unconscious feelings to do with the parent-child dynamic - that between you and your parent(s) as well as that between you and your children.
Unfortunately, getting either CBT or psychotherapy on the NHS is very difficult - a brief course of CBT after a long period on a waiting list is very possible. This does not mean that you should not speak to your GP, though - it sounds as if you feel you are reaching a really difficult point ('it's all getting too much for me') and you might get lucky with a referral as all NHS authorities are different. Speaking about the problem to a sympathetic professional can also be incredibly helpful and will make you feel as if you are taking a step in the right direction.
Anger can be a manifestation of sadness, so it might be worth asking if you think you are depressed. Equally, it can be an expression of powerlessness - do you feel ambialent about being at home with the kids, for e.g.? Are there other problems in your life (conscious or repressed) that might be manifesting in this way? I cannot comment on you situation specifically as I am not a professional and have never met you, but these are just a couple of many possible factors. There is a lot of good support on the internet, and if you are interested in private CBT or psychotherapy (psychodynamic therapy might work well), look at the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy website to find a local, appropriately qualified person.
Good luck - and huge sympathies. It is very hard going through feelings of rage, but you are taking important steps to deal with things in a way that can only be postive for you, your partner and children.
