I would recommend leaving it to nature and push. Sounds like you had a really hard time of it first time round but second will most likely be completely different and much easier/quicker. Would you consider meditation and reflexology? Think it would really help you. Good luck x

Leyah, being too anxious to sleep must be making the rest of your pregnancy and life in general not much fun. Going into a VBAC feeling so anxious is surely not going to help it go well. Do whatever you need to reduce anxiety (excluding valium or a bottle of gin of course!), and don't feel guilty about your choices. They are yours to make. Except when the baby makes them for you.

Try not to let NHS politics push you into a corner feeling trapped (easier said than done, I know).

My first was a very complicated emergency CS at 29 weeks (pre-eclampsia), and recovery was tough. My 2nd was an elective CS at age 40. Recovery was a breeze.

Healthy mum and healthy baby, during and after pregnancy, is the aim. There are many ways of achieving this. Guilt doesn't help any of them. Good luck with whatever option you (or the baby!) choose.

I highly recommend ELCS but it's a personal choice of course. Good luck.

Hi,

I had an elective c section in January 2012 due to exactly what you described, complete anxiety. I couldn't sleep at the thought of a natural birth and so I spoke to my midwife - she was absolutely brilliant and felt that an elective c section was the right thing for me.

The whole experience was incredible, I was so scared but was so well taken care of I can honestly say I'd do it again in a heartbeat.

I went with my gut feeling and am so glad that I did. You need to trust how you feel and go with what you feel is right for you.

This might be interesting article to read!

http://articles.mercola.com/sites/artic ... ction.aspx

Lindseyj - yes, all of that. I was absolutely set on an elective, nothing could nor did change my mind. I wasn't particularly looking forward to a newborn, as I had my beloved older daughter already. My husband had pushed for another. That said I wasn't dreading it, just nowhere near as excited as I was for my first. (NB: She's now almost 3 and I can't imagine being without her, she's a delight to us all! Mostly )

I do feel a great deal of guilt, but only because my second has had horrendous trouble with allergies, which I can't help but feel are attributable in part to her delivery (by section). If she'd have been healthy, I honestly don't think I'd have felt any guilt. I feel none for my first section, but that was very much out of my hands, I didn't choose that, I was unconscious, and also she was healthy. I wish I'd studied the links between allergies and csections, I wish I'd noticed the genetic predisposition we had to that and not taken the additional risk. But even if someone had waved the facts and figures in front of me, I'd have taken no notice at the time, I was just petrified of history repeating.

I find it very difficult to watch any of the popular birth programmes now, I get such envy when friends have babies naturally.

However, I think deep down I probably know that had I tried VBAC, the chances of me being successful (given my own situation/previous) were really very, very slim.

I am having the same dilemma as you. Due in march. All the replies have been really interesting. I had my 4.5kg son by emergency csec after trying every single form of birth aid. The episiotomy was the worst thing I experienced and made it so hard to recover I could hardly sit! The csec scar felt mild in comparison. So this time I have my heart set on a elected section. Although I am already a lot smaller for my weeks than my first (13months ago) and think if I stay smaller then possibly the baby will be able to come out naturally. 4.5kg was never going to come from a size 8! But seriously well done to anyone that's managed it! So I am in two minds about it. Did anyone elect csec and feel guilty about not going through the 'battle'? I have to say also this pregnancy has been unbearable with feeling ill and fatigue and feeling down that I am a bit worried that I am not looking forward to anything with the new baby as I know all the hard times that are coming. I hope this sounds familiar and replies keep coming. The posts are what get you through. Xx

Leyah - there is really only one right answer and that is what feels right for you. My 1st was an emergency c-section and i was desperate to try the 'normal' birth after that. which is what i did. my 2nd was a 4kg baby and was not going to come out on her own accord. when the consultant told me they were taking me to a theatre to attempt instrumental delivery or if it fails to do a c-section, i was devastated. at the end she (my 2nd) came out by forceps which was the one thing i was totally scared of. need not have been - it was fine for the baby. except i got a 3a tear and the recovery was so difficult after that, that made recovery after c-section look like a walk in the park. i was still going back to hospital for check ups and procedures 11mths after her birth…

in retrospect, i am certainly glad i tried the 'normal' birth but the recovery was just too difficult because of the tear.

i chose to have my 3rd as an elective c-section and it was great. slightly weird to go to hospital at a specific time and just get on a bed and have the baby come out, but apart from that brilliant. no stress (did not want the uncertainty of labour timing with 2 other kids at home and no immediate relatives in the UK), no drama, no pain. recovery was fantastic and so much easier than after forceps. of course i felt slight pangs of conscience for not trying to have a normal birth but i just could not face the recovery like i had after nr2 again, not with 2 older kids in tow…

good luck with whatever you choose. st thomas's were very good with both options. and very supportive.

I had my first child with an emergency C-Section and I've nearly died after the delivery as my body didn't recognise that the baby was out and kept pumping blood to the uterus...leading to some major bleeding.

There was no way I would have considered to go for a normal delivery with my second one as so many times if there are complication you end up with an emergency C-Section anyway. So my husband and I were very clear about what we wanted and what we didn't want to risk.

Having said that I have friends that had a C-Section with the first and a VBAC with the second and everything went well.

It will be your decision but you need to go with what your feelings are and don't worry to much about what other people (doctors, nurses or even friends) think. It's too personal and you cannot let them influence your decision, I mean push you to make a decision you are not sure about...

xx

My first was a 'crash' section, so under general anaesthetic and I was so scarred by it that I demanded an elective next time round, even prior to getting pregnant again I wanted absolute certainty that I could have one.

I was made to do a VBAC course at C&W and felt v patronised by the young midwife treating me as though I wanted the 'glamorous' option (????) as she put it. Ended up in a right state at the mere thought of VBAC, and possible emergency again, as I got to 37 weeks and they still hadn't booked me in for an elective.

I got my elective, 39 weeks. And honestly, even after being so utterly adamant, nothing would have changed my mind from an elective ...... I wish I'd tried VBAC. But, BUT, hindsight is a wonderful thing. I am equally well aware of the surgeon's comments that it was lucky I HADN'T tried a VBAC as there were some complications, even with the elective.

So it's easy for me to sit here in hindsight and say I wish I'd tried ..... it was far harder at the time to even think about doing so.

No-one can tell you, you have to try and reach a decision that you'll feel as comfortable as possible with. It's a scary place, I have every sympathy.

I would completely agree with the above comments, my second was Vbac after I had an emergency c-section due to pre-eclampsia with my first. I didn't really mind how my babies were born as long as they were healthy, but wanted to try to have a normal delivery as I hated having to stay in hospital for 3days after my c-section! The delivery was fine and I also got a big sense of achievement too! I was home within a few hours snuggling with the family and loved it - no sleepless nights on a ward with 5 other people's babies crying! The support at C&W was fantastic too. Good luck with whichever you decide x

I had to have an emergency C-section for my first but had a natural birth 16 months later with my second. I really didn't want to have a second c-section particularly because my son was so young. I went to the VBAC clinic at the Chelsea & Westminster and had an appointment with the specialist midwife who went though my notes on my first birth and explained that since I got to full dilation the first time (the emergence occurred because the baby's heart rate dropped). She thought it was very likely that I could be able to have a natural birth. I was booked in for a sweep on my due date and for a c-section a few days later (I asked or it to be as late as possible).

I actually went into labour in the early hours on the due date, got to the hospital at 12 midday (was 8 cms by 12.30) and the baby was born at 3pm. I was discharged at 7pm and home by 8pm! The recovered was so much better than the first time round. I would recommend discussing your situation with the VBAC midwife. Good luck

You could try contacting someone to give you some counselling and perhaps some Hyponbirthing sessions would help calm and reassure you. Every mother experiences birth in such a different way that I suspect it is a very hard question to answer on here.

Hi all,

I really need some advice to help me decide what to do. My daughter is due in January & after the traumatic emergency c- section by which my son was born the doctors are urging me to push, however I am so anxious I'm not sleeping at all. I don't want to have to have an emergency c- section again and I know having an elective is easier than that. I would like to push, of course, I just want to hear from women who had an emergency first who then went on to have a successful vaginal delivery or a smooth elective. With scar tissue being a factor I know there may be some issues for me with both. Please help. Thanks,
Leyah