Well, perhaps not THAT sudden, I have always wanted children in a 'when I grow up' sort of way. So has my husband. But recently, and I mean overnight, I seem to have gone completely mad over the idea of having a little one. I am not sure whether it is a hormone thing or an age thing (I'm 28 so hardly pushed for fertile years yet - I hope) but I can think of nothing else but babies despite all the financial and work issues which would normally persuade me that the timing isn't great, no rush etc. I am normally such a SENSIBLE person! I started a new role last year and although I now qualify for SMP I am on a temporary contract so not hugely secure financially and also worried about what my employers would say if I announced a pregnancy so soon (a year)in to my two year contract. My husband works and could support us but not without some significant sacrifices. It would make much more financial and career sense to wait two years.
I have talked about what I refer to as my 'baby madness' endlessly with my husband, who says he would wait another year ideally, but he understands and would be 'happy if it happened'. So the choice about TTC is mine and I am totally conflicted about what to do. The decision feels like such a responsibility and so full of what ifs and whys and always overshadowed by the fear so many of us have 'what if I struggle to conceive will I wish I had started sooner' vs 'I can't give in so easily, a year isn't that long to wait. Although, it is. It feels like forever (cue the voice in my head 'stop being silly, it's a child, not a handbag you can't be rash about these things'). But it doesn't feel rash, it feels like every part of me has gone a tiny bit mad with longing. What is the point of this ramble?! I suppose to ask whether anyone else feels/ felt this way. I know that there is never a perfect time but did folk choose to ride out these feelings for a while before jumping in. Surely I shouldn't be this conflicted?! Or is it normal?! TIA
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