Can a solicitor mummy ever achieve a work/family life happy balance? Post Reply

[NoodleFan]

You poor thing having to make this decision.
I have no experience of the law but after reading all these posts I am feeling very grateful for my 3 day a week, reasonabley-paid job.
Sounds like you would really like to spend some time with your children and, from what people are saying, going down the city route with more training would not achieve this. Could you take the two years off and spend it with your kids instead, then think about going back to what you're doing now, or maybe something totally different. If you're salesy then there must be lots of options open. You don't sound very happy and I would hate you to regret not spending enough time with your kids.
I really hope you decide on something that makes you happy. Good luck.

[ZoePierides]

I have to agree with the above statements.
My husband and I both worked for a US firm, and when we were ten years qualified I finally quit the law after having our second child and he went on to become a partner. I didn't even seriously ask the firm if I could work part time as I knew it was not a serious proposal and would not work. Having the clients we had were like having a baby - they needed you 24/7. The only difference is that babies have to sleep - eventually! I loved my work but it did not fit with having a family.
When I went back to work full time after baby no 1, my toddler came to see the nanny as his main parent and even had her Polish accent.
The possibilities of part time work in law: a niche area such as Employment Law supporting on transactions is possible to do three days a week (as an experienced lawyer). Or the PSL roles already mentioned - not as fun as working on deals. Or possibly helping with business development.

[firsttimerSW11]

I am not a lawyer but am/was in a similar position to you and faced a similar dilemma of looking for something else. It wasn't easy. Someone suggested finding a part time role with a similar skillset requirement to your existing capabilities but as someone who has tried that, I have yet to hear of anyone who has managed to find a part time job. If you're in an existing role, it's easier to move to part time than find part time from scratch. It's all full time or nothing.
In my case, the choice was to quit to be a SAHM or stay working 5 days, long hours etc. I've made the decision to stay in work, because I like working and don't want to give up completely but would give my right arm for something 3 days a week, or even 4.
I see my DC for about 15 minutes a day. Well paid as it is, you massively miss out on time with the DC. The point I'm making is that really, if your experience is anything like mine, your options are to put up and shut up, while missing out on your children, or quitting everything you've worked for and becoming a SAHM. The situation for many mums -and generally it is mums - in well paid careers (where it still makes financial sense to work ) is pretty grim and options are quite limited.

[Janet14]

Hi
I am a full time working Mum in a different field but still sales and adore my job, get paid well and have an amazing work/life balance. If you would like to chat let me know.

[Lilybetta1]

It's a really tough decision to make! To add to what others have already said, I am a solicitor and worked in the City (private practice, corporate) for over ten years. After maternity leave for our eldest child, I moved in house.
Generally, private practice particularly in the City is a tough slog. You have to get through law school (expensive, if you don't have a training contract sponsor), secure a training contract which I believe these days can be like gold dust, do 2 years of training when you will be at the beck and call of anyone and everyone and then gain a position on qualification. As both a junior, and senior, lawyer in private practice I regularly worked until the early hours of the morning which just wasn't sustainable post-children.
However, as others have said, that is very much the world of "City law". There are other options out there such as paralegal work (though depending on the firm you may find that it isn't very interesting... a lot of proof reading etc).
If you are keen to explore the legal world though, then with children I would suggest you look at in-house options. It is no guarantee of a better work life balance but it does at least have more potential. Increasingly, the bigger companies offer their own training contracts (although there are fewer of them) which could be a nice and interesting angle. Also, I'm not 100% sure but I think the Government Legal Service now also takes on trainees which could be something to explore. For the latter, although the people I know there still work hard there is a lot more flexibility, scope for home working and part time etc (probably not as a trainee, but later on).
Good luck!

[HikingGirl]

Agree with all of the above, best to find something in your current field that does give more flexibility. There's certainly no point staying in a job where you don't feel valued, as eventually that is not a very secure income either. This could get from bad to worse. Of course it could get better too (who knows, your boss may unexpectedly leave next month! It does happen). Better to take the initiative though, and start looking around. Have a chat with Capability Jane and Time Wise Jobs about your options. Think about what sort of flex you need. 4 days a week and 1 day from home? Would something with less commuting time solve all your problems? Working from home 2 mornings? Starting late 2 mornings? Usually if you accept a full-time job, but you know there is flexibility in it, you can make it work AND earn enough. Much harder if you accept a part-time job. Consider also that a a full-time nanny is just for now. Once they are all in school it changes. After school nannies do exist (although are harder to find and may be lesser quality) but especially as your husband is more flexible that may not be an issue. An au-pair may be an option when they are older, or a holiday au-pair if you are struggling covering the holidays. And after age 7 it's more important you have someone who actually knows how to help them with homework. I run a free website helping mothers find work life balance or return to work. Have a look at the pages on flex work to find some organisations that could help you: http://www.mumandcareer.co.uk/flexible-working/ In the IT sector they are desperate for more women, AND working from home and not having a fixed starting time is just normal in many companies in the tech sector. Perhaps your background could give you a good entry there?

[shai_lo]

Hello

I am a solicitor in-house. Depending in what area of law you qualify into you can absolutely achieve a good balance. Corporate is a no no - but that's where the money is. I work n financial regulation and I work 4 days a week one of which is from home. I start at 9:00/9:30 and finish at 5:30. My line manager doesn't believer in working late and at weekends. One of my colleagues trained at the bank and stayed after qualifying and she has the same hours but works 5 days. I would say that it's not at all impossible - but you have to give up on something .. pay! I am happy with my situation and my 3 year old daughter sees a lot of me. He dad is a corporate lawyer and he still manages to come home everyday for bath and bed time - even if he has to work more later on. It depends where you end up and what it is you are looking for.

Good luck!