Advice on pupil behaviour needed Post Reply

[windmill26]

I'm unhinged!!! Loool...
Seriously!!! After the post you wrote about a teenager burping, you're calling me unhinged. I'm surprised you haven't asked for a line up and fingerprints. Some of the replies too (they are not like us)! Animals, cages, knives.....its all getting a bit out of hand for a burp! Some very interesting view points from (nappyValley)

Look ,I don't think we are going to agree on this and I feel that you are taking this post completely the wrong way for some reasons that you may have to explore.Does my post rub you the wrong way because of what happened to your child and nothing was done? Is it because I am willing to challenge poor behaviour (however petty) with the hope that saying something may stop said behaviour escalating? Would have been acceptable in your view for me to say something if he spat at me? maybe that will be his next action to get a cheap laugh from his friends...
Do you also think that I was wrong talking to the school about the pupil that broke the row of lights in my development as he didn't hurt anyone physically? What about the pupils burning homework books in the park? The books were not theirs,they took them from another girl at school and decided that was OK to risk burning the park down while doing something so mean and stupid! This is my point,petty behaviour often escalates if left unchallenged.

[helliebee]

Windmill26 I'm sorry to see this thread seems to have been hijacked by people with issues of their own, seemingly looking for a fight.
It's not clear to me why we're not all on the side of trying to live in a pleasant society, whether that is by encouraging teenage oiks not to be revolting or by extending the hand of friendship to each other on (normally) supportive sites like this.
There is of course always a scale and people will naturally have different levels of tolerance for certain behaviours but that doesn't mean it's ok to rubbish or belittle others' genuine concerns. If people have input perhaps they could offer it constructively or not at all.
Personally I am glad that people are prepared to stick up for manners. Some posters could work on theirs.

[Star]

I Would contact the headmaster with a general complaint citing that incident and any others and ask what steps he will take to ensure good behaviour outside of the school. If you and others complain they are much more likely to address it.
Me and a few others complained to Ernest Bevin for separate incidents. They were always generally good and respectful boys but some rowdy and rude behaviour from a few. I have seen a massive improvement since they started having teachers patrol the streets immediately out of the school and in fact I would say no issues at all with them for well over a year. I know Ernest Bevin seem to take behaviour very seriously and believe taking a proactive approach really helped since I moved here in 2014.
I personally would have told them off more directly. They are very unlikely to harm you if you call them out, they will just scuttle off and hopefully think twice about there behaviour. I tend to put on a teachers voice and say something like " have some respect for the children and elderly on this street" or " you went get far in life with that sort of behaviour". I have broken up a fight, shouted away boys throwing fireworks in the street and told them off for littering. Often other boys would apologize on their behalf and say they are idiots so you are helping the good kids in their school too by making a stand and showing them they can make a stand. The rude ones definitely need standing up to and taught discipline and yes it is the school's responsibility to ensure their pupils behave when leaving school.
Good luck!

[somemum]

I'm unhinged!!! Loool...
Seriously!!! After the post you wrote about a teenager burping, you're calling me unhinged. I'm surprised you haven't asked for a line up and fingerprints. Some of the replies too (they are not like us)! Animals, cages, knives.....its all getting a bit out of hand for a burp! Some very interesting view points from (nappyValley)

Cats1 - have you noticed - it seems to be only you that feels this way? Stop attacking people for their concerns, and listen to what people are saying. Of course it's terrible that your autistic son was treated that way, and I'm sure everyone on this post, including myself, would jump at helping in that situation, and be outraged at that behaviour. I hope he was OK. I'm very sorry nothing was done about it. I hope you are getting enough help - I'm sure your situation can be difficult, tiring and worrying.
However, rude, disrespectful behaviour should not be unchecked, as teenagers will keep pushing the boundaries, and who knows, perhaps they will move on to targeting an elderly person or an autistic child eventually. Children must be taught that intimidating / teasing people they don't know is not acceptable. It should be explained to them how upsetting it could be - to try and put themselves in that person's shoes, to learn empathy. If more parents focussed on this from an early age, teaching respect and concern for people around us, perhaps our society would have less of the social problems it has today. I'm not saying that is the only issue - of course there are many many more, but it certainly can't hurt, and it is something every parent can do. 
Sending best wishes to you.

[SouthfieldsAcademy]

We are sorry to read that you have been on the receiving end of anti-social behaviour by our students.  This type of behaviour, which brings the Academy into disrepute, is embarrassing and frustrating. Please be reassured that we speak to all our students regularly in assemblies about how to conduct themselves outside of school and have communicated our expectations very clearly to their parents or carers.  In dedicated personal and social education lessons all our students are taught what behaviours and values our society expects. We would encourage anyone who encounters any issues such as this with our students to contact our Principal, Jacqueline Valin, at the Academy on 0208 875 2600 with any information, such as colour of tie (which shows year group), that will help us to identify the student or, as has been suggested, with photographs.  Any student we identify will be held accountable and sanctioned according to our behaviour policy.  Thank you for bringing this to our attention.

[cats1]

Windmill26 No you're post did not rub me up on the wrong way at all. And it wasn't because you are willing to challenge poor behaviour, because the FACT is you did not challenge it, you came home and vented your frustration out on here!...did anyone spit in your face? Was there a fire in the park...does Children's behaviour always lead to more more? Citation needed! There is currently some severe poverty, broken homes and conflict situations that children are coming from, maybe if you concentrated more on those areas you might not feel so angry. Get involved with the community, might do you the world of good!

[cats1]

Somemum. Cheers for the message, but really I'm all good for having a different opinion, I just didn't like the whole queries in wanting to take pictures in an underhand way. Not every child has the luxury of having a caring parent as well as guidance and moral coding before they set out for their school day, some don t even get to eat properly. Lots of very negative messages on here about the Children, what I do see is lots of people "coming together" to complain, but I don't see anyone reaching out a hand to help. Have a great sleep!!

[windmill26]

"Windmill26 No you're post did not rub me up on the wrong way at all.It is still looking that way And it wasn't because you are willing to challenge poor behaviour, because the FACT is you did not challenge it  I did tell the toerag that he was an idiot and an animal,he smirked, you came home and vented your frustration out on here! I did but I also asked a simple question...did anyone spit in your face? maybe that will be his next move if left unchallenged. Was there a fire in the park just the fact that an adult is asking this question is worrying! Let's see ,paper set on fire on dry grass by dry bushes ,I am not an expert but I was taught that fire can spread very quickly!...does Children's behaviour always lead to more more? sometimes,isn't better to nip it in the bud?Citation needed! There is currently some severe poverty, broken homes and conflict situations that children are coming from,I am aware of all that but you can't always excuse bad behaviour if you concentrated more on those areas you know what? I concentrate on behaving the right way,teaching my kid to be an upstanding citizen and a kind human being but I am not a social justice warrior and it is NOT my job to concentrate on those areas you might not feel so angry back to you,maybe re-read your answers and than we can talk about feeling angry. Get involved with the community,I do what I can,take your own advice! might do you the world of good!"same to you!

Cats1,now you have my answers ,do us all a favour....please move on!