Did you receive a present for giving birth? Post Reply

[sapphires]

Hopefully I won't get shot down for writing a post like this during lockdown.

Did you get given a special something for giving birth? A ring or other piece of jewellery? My husband who isn't English thinks it is a ridiculous idea and feels our gorgeous son is gift enough.

I wouldn't be honest if I didn't say that a piece of me is envious when I see eternity rings and necklaces being worn by my friends for birth presents and I wonder if it is just me or if others who didn't get a gift feel the same?

[Moonlightdawn]

Hi, I received birth presents. I’m very sentimental about them.

My first child, who is a boy, loves to ask me about the necklace that daddy gave mummy on the day he was born. We have lovely nostalgic chats about his first day on earth.

I’m not sure how thrilled my husband was when I asked for birth presents.... But he did it anyway. We went to a jewellery shop together and chose them.

I think they are a wonderful token. I hope your other half treats you to one. Don’t feel guilty or bad!

[baconandeggs]

I didn't receive any gifts and I'm with you Sapphire. I don't know if it was the hormones but I felt envious of the rings that friends were gifted. I'm over it now but it would have been a nice gesture.

[denshort]

I did not and was not offended/upset, I was not expecting anything, didn't really know it was a thing to be honest.

[Deleted]

I am firmly in favour of push pressies. My DH did none of the hard work during my pregnancies so knew it was the least he could do after I sacrificed my body and my Wine Society subscription.

When I had my first, he got me a Birkin which is embossed with a single red flower. It’s the one that she (our first) is named after.

For our second, he got me those golden Pearl earrings and a bangle from Tiffany, again a clever nod to the name. It wasn’t quite as good a gift as the first but then again, neither was the baby!

[juliantenniscoach]

I got my long suffering wife a lovely watch for the birth of our first daughter.................and a fridge freezer for the second!  

We're still married  

[livegreen]

@julien

I bet when she opened the fridge freezer......that her face lit up.

Presents for giving birth.....crazy......you got a baby.   Is that not enough ?

This is like the mums on here expecting their husband to get them Mother’s Day gifts.

Very few real world perspectives - a bit self centred imho.

[cantcomplain]

I think it's a shame that it's become a thing - yet more commercialism. It honestly didn't occur to me that I'd receive a present - isn't the child the gift? 

[Starr]

No I didn't but some of my NCT friends did. We were too busy saving and sorting out selling our flat and buying a house. But I think it's a lovely idea and does not have to be hugely expensive.
That year we moved to our house with a baby and preschooler my husband told me my birthday present was the kitchen he had bought for.... me
We are still married! and he has improved since on that front.

[JamTart]

I got the much appreciated - and not inexpensive - gift of repair surgery. And a black cab home after the op.

 

[NorahJude]

I just got an extra special birthday present for my first child and planning on doing the same for my second. Rather than spending on a bday AND a push present we chose to spend a little bit more than we should on a combined gift. Both are rings so want to take my time to choose / get it made. So I didn’t get the present exactly around the time of giving birth but still. I always look down at the ring of my first and think of all the great things that happened that year: A special birthday, our baby and more. I have two daughters so plan on giving each of them the ring I got for their birth one day. It’s very sentimental to me.

[londonite]

No, and it didn’t even cross our minds... though we’ll be getting something for now 2-year-old from the new baby when they arrive. I could see my oh perhaps being inclined to get me something small to represent and celebrate both kiddos (eg charms with their names on it, a personalised frame or book) but not a present for me independent of that just to mark giving birth, if that makes sense?

I don’t have anything against it, but the way I see it for our family, it’s not like I was doing it exclusively for him - the baby is someone shared by both of us. I also found that I disproportionately got presents gifts from others and post-baby treats for myself (relaxation kits, massages, food, coffee/cake, commemorative activities with the baby, thumbprint jewellery at 1 year, etc).

What I did very much appreciate was his extra effort to give me a break even when he was off work and exhausted himself from full-time care - early Saturday morning walks with the baby so I could sleep a bit night nappy changes, huge amounts of the cooking.


If it matters to you and you want something to mark it between the two of you, perhaps choose something together? But if not, try not to worry yourself about what others are doing in this regard if it’s not something you genuinely care about otherwise; the area we’re in is lovely, but I’ve definitely felt pressure to ‘keep up’ with other mom friends on activities, presents, etc. - it’s exhausting, expensive and not particularly useful to compare my circumstances and choices to theirs, so I do my best to let it go and do things the way OH and myself wish to

[CJmarta]

Hello,
We went together to pick up a piece of jewellery to celebrate the birth of our daughter (i think she was 8 months as we didn’t have time before, it wasn’t a priority).
We bought sapphire earrings which I will give her when she’ll turn 18.
I had a second child recently and hasn’t crossed my mind yet but we’ll probably buy a token to celebrate his birth too.
I’d say it doesn’t have to be expensive but a small gift that lasts forever is nice

[rosie.fc]

Hello, I agree that it is a shame that it's become a thing.  I hadn't heard of it at all til NCT talked about 'push presents'. Feels like there's enough to spend money on when a child arrives and just gives potential for mums to be disappointed at a massively hormonal time given most Dads would have zero idea that this was expected.
I did however get brought a Lot of sushi and parma ham type stuff by hubby while in hospital when i had to stay in a few days due to all my whinging about missing it when pregnant. That was good.

[Minastudio]

I recall my husband brought a pot of mini roses upon the arrival of our firstborn.
I don't believe a gift will make you remember the birth of your children or their manifestation to your relationship any more. That said I understand the beauty of receiving gifts but they say literally nothing of the magnitude or importance of a life event. 
Just as, small or large or even a wedding with just the two says nothing of how lovely and lasting a marriage will be. 

True beauty sometimes lays in the very stripped back gift of life. The simple things. 

However, If it really does mean a lot to you why not bring the topic up and explain you would like something to commemorative the birth of your child. I am certain it will be seen to or perhaps pick it out together?