How much is too much arguing? Post Reply

[Green juice]

I has dawned on me recently that partner and I seem to argue a quite a lot. Can't put my finger on exactly when I had this realisation but it has shaken me a little and I am wondering how much arguing is the right amount v too much in a household of two adults and a toddler. Sorry, I appreciate that there might not be a straightforward answer.

[muddyboots]

It’s obviously very subjective, so no answer on here will help you really.
I guess the fact that you posted the question is enough to answer your question.

More importantly, take the steps to address it.
You have a small toddler, it’s quite normal to be tired/stressed/busy and become short tempered with each other.

Maybe decide for ONE day, that whatever your partner says that annoys you, let it slide. As if it’s raining… see how it then changed how he reacts to you .
Often people think how they want the other person to change , but we only have control of ourselves . So mirror what you want from your other half and be the change .
This often leads to a positive change in the other person.
Instead of criticism, which often feel good to blurt out but never helps the situation.
Easier said than done !
Perhaps speak to him and explain how you feel.

[Mikeydon]

If your arguments are becoming a routine more predictable than morning coffee, it might be worth considering a new blend of communication. Healthy disagreements are like seasoning in a relationship – a sprinkle here and there adds flavor, but drowning in it could leave a bitter taste. Aim for constructive conversations instead of turning your home into a perpetual debating society.

[Vicki W]

I would question what you're arguing about and whether it resolves issues. Constructive arguing is fine, particularly if you are both tired or one of you is not pulling their weight, the same argument over and over again is more problematic. Does your partner share in trying to resolve issues or is it about a deeper issue such as uneven power in the relationship? Once you've analysed what you think might be going on, I'd try to sit down with your partner, tell them it's bothering you and ask them for their thoughts on how to resolve this

[SW4Mummy1]

Having to adjust to a toddler creates much more reasons to argue. You should sit down and communicate expectations and frustrations and try to learn from the bickering. Communication is key. Also sometimes I argue with my husband a lot and other times not so much, the fluctuation is normal x