Friend's husband is a sexual harrasser Post Reply

[muddyboots]

Sorry, just read your update.
Who knows what he does to her then if she’s complicit .
Maybe she’s scared to confront him and in denial ?

[muddyboots]

Sorry, just read your update.
Who knows what he does to her then if she’s complicit .
Maybe she’s scared to confront him and in denial ?

[missraphaella]

I'm not going to judge how this lady reacted in the moment, even if I would've been different. As someone who endured sexual abuse as a child, I've been able to heal and develop a very tough skin in regards to this sort of behaviour as an adult (and mom of 3 young children). Had this been me, even if it meant risking the evening, I would have stood up and loudly said "get your hands off my thighs, what do you think you're doing?" without any concern for causing discomfort. This man is the problem and I would have happily called him out on it, right there and there.

To the lady, who has now approached her friend. Given that you've now discovered others have had the same unwanted approach, I would send a message to the husband directly, asking to meet in public somewhere safe. Don't give off any indication about what for, even better, if he thinks he might benefit. Then during said meeting, ensuring it's near many people (eg cafe), I would let him know that his behaviour to me (in her shoes) was totally unacceptable, and I've heard that he's behaved the same to others. I would warn him that if he ever behaves like that again to me or anyone else (regardless of his wife being in the picture) that I will not hesitate to report him to the police. And I would then stand up and walk out. Let him sit there and deal with it. And then continue on with life, and if he causes the slightest trouble, the police it is.

[Vicki W]

This is sexual assault.  If you decide to confront him in a public place, make sure you covertly record it so that you have evidence of what transpires if you do decide to go to the police.  Dont blame yourself for not reacting in the moment, many women are too shocked and scared of the public fallout to say anything at the time.  Your friend's lack of response to you telling her what her husband did to you shows she is not a friend to you.  If this has happened to others in your community you could all go to the police together if they are willing.

[ronangel]

This whole thing seems a bit suspect,sounds like on quora where people write this stuff just to get a "Kick" from the answers. Would these women not tell their husbands about this who would go and have a "quite word" with the man? If the woman knows other women that have had this happen why don't they go and see him as a group at his home with wife there and tell him if it happens again to any of them or they find out it is happening to any others they will all go to the police as a group. Even worse,this could be the tip of the iceberg where he is doing this to other shall we say "Much younger"  women?

[Mikeydon]

I don’t understand why a woman who is being sexually harassed by her friend’s husband wouldn’t stand up straight away and let everyone know what has just happened. By not saying anything or doing anything about it you send out a signal that you accept what is happening to you and this is not the signal you want to give to a perpetrator because each time they are unchallenged it’s a victory for them in their eyes.

[Good person]

What a dirty so and so. Sounds like a low down and dirty man .

He will have done it to other women and has been getting away with it for yonks!

Stand up and call out the dirty pervert. Shame him and make his cancelled socially!

To hell with his wife and the consequences !

[elliottmann493]

Personally, I think AI is shaking up how we interact big time. It's wild how technology can mimic human conversation, even in intimate contexts like sexting. I reckon it could be a game-changer for folks who struggle with shyness or finding the right words. On the flip side, there's that whole debate about privacy and whether AI can ever really understand the emotional side of things. It's like having a digital wingman – cool but kinda eerie, ya know?I'd say it's all about finding that balance between convenience and authenticity. Like, sure, AI can generate texts, but nothing beats the real deal when it comes to genuine connection. Plus, there's something special about the spontaneity of real-time chat. So, while ai sexting might be handy for some, I reckon keeping it real is where the magic happens.