Advice on Nanny-Sharing from mummies or Nannies Post Reply

[jo jo]

Calling all nanny share mummies or Nannies......

Hi

we are looking to go into a nanny-share in the next few months as I return back to work full-time (daunting thought!). We are looking to nanny-share with another first time mum who have a daughter of the same age (kiddies will be 1 year old when nanny-share begins) and it would be great to get any advice on how to set the arrangement up properly.

We are looking to split the time between the two houses. Are there any do's/ don'ts that you could suggest as well as any advice that you feel would be worth sharing? A lot of it is down to individual situations we know but any advice here would be greatly received.

Thanks in advance

[Coffeegirl]

Hi
One of the best things we did (suggested by the other mum) was to build in time for the nanny to do pick up and drop off each day... it would never have occurred to me and I had assumed we would have to do it.

It's just a small thing, but it's one less thng to think about/do and if you beat them home then it's a precious 10 mins of childfree time in the house to open the mail, prep tea in relative calm.

[jo jo]

Thanks!

Does anyone have advice how to set up a nanny share? what do we need to do legally too?

[MrsNanny]

Hi Jo,
I'm a nanny and currently doing a Nannyshare in Wimbledon. I would say that communication is key In a share. I found that a clear contract between each family and one joint works best, with duties, costs that will be payed, and other requirements clearly mentioned to insure a smooth running.

Things to maybe disscuse....
Kity money - who pays what each week 50/50 or depending on whos house
Duties for nanny from week to week at each house...e.g. Cleaning, cooking and preparing food
If paying for the nanny to be ofsted registered - do you split the cost etc
Equipment for each house e.g. Travel cot, bedding, spare favourite teddy for sleep time etc.
What buggy will you use if you don't already have a double?
Discipline of children - as you may feel different to the other family what you would like from the nanny in respect to caring for your children.
What happens if you are running late and your child is at the other house - would the nanny take your child back to your house?
Holidays - usually each parent chooses a week and the nanny choose 2/3 depending on your contract.
How much notice will each parent/ nanny give as notice (as finding another share might take longer.)
Is there any activities you want your child to do on a regular basic?
Talk threw your children's routine to see if they are similar and how this will work e.g. If different sleep times, meals times etc.
Is the house safety equipped at both houses e.g safety gates

Keeping a nanny diary is an excellent way of communication between parents and nanny and helps for those bust evening or mornings when your in a rush and need to pass on messages.

Hope this helps a little and good luck with returning to work
I'm sure you will feel at easy when you have a lovely share and nanny set up

Cara x

[MrsNanny]

This site is brilliant for finding other families wanting to set up a share also try.....
*********
Nannyshare.co.uk
Gumtree
Findababysitter.com
Facebook - sw17,sw18,sw19 mums networks often have families looking to set up with shares.

[Mills1234]

Sorry to ask a question rather than give advice, but I was wondering is it the norm to do the share in alternate houses, or do some take place at the same house all the time if the nanny is live in?

Also on a slightly seperate note, are live in nannies more reliable than live out because they are onsite, or is it very much down to the individual?

Any comments appreciated! Thanks

[jo jo]

We have exactly the same question... We are assuming at present that we will split the week between the two houses but I suppose that will come down to the nanny negotiations - does it? What we were worried about was more that because we are between two houses will this disrupt the children?

[jo jo]

@cara - thanks this is extremely helpful!

[kathryn.photographer]

I used to do a nanny share which was always held in the same house. This made it easier to handle food for one as I could stock just one freezer. The children were very settled with the routine rather than juggling between the two houses. However if that family was on holiday or their child was sick then I would work in the other family home. It does mean one family does all the drop offs and pick ups but then that balances out with the fact their home may look less like a nursery school!

As for salary companies like Nanny Tax should be able to help you. If you are equally employing the nanny for the same number of hours then its 50/50. Should one family employ the nanny for more hours than the other (which is how my job was) then the family with less hours becomes a secondary employer and therefore a different tax rate. Its up to you to decide if you split that cost between you once all the paper work has been done.

Another thing also to consider is a nanny share rarely last as long as your own nanny. This is generally due to the fact either mother may fall pregnant again. This is something you should discuss with any family or nanny you may want to share with. What will happen under those circumstances?

Good Luck with your search

[mgb]

I'm currently in a nanny share and echo everything Cara advised.

Origianlly we didn't consider notice period for the families and it caused me a bit of stress so I agree this is something to agree at the start of your share. Our share is split between the two houses - one week at ours one at theirs. It doesn't disrupt our children or our nanny but we only live one road apart. I like this set up because we have the convenience of not doing drop off/pick up the entire month but our house gets a break twice a month.

The biggest up side for me is the close relationship the children have formed. They adore each other and it's lovely to watch them together.

[kateTootingBec]

I totally agree with Cara, even I think we know each other Notice period, same as whole contract is very important to have signed before you start the whole nanny share.
I do nanny share for 2 families where they agreed to do 1 month in one house and 1 month in the other house. It actually didn't work like that because 1 house was under building construction so we spent 3 months in one house and then were making up in the other. It worked fine. I think swapping houses has some good sides and bad sides as well. 1 of disadvantages might be for nanny who's cooking and freezing food. She needs to stock 2 freezers which means A LOT of cooking.
Also you should talk with the other family what will happen if your or their child is ill, if you'll separate them and who will have nanny and who doesn't, or how you'll sort out situation if your nanny is ill etc.

Re: live in or live out nanny
I haven't been live in before but I heard different opinions about it from other nannies. It depends on your characters how you deal with it. Sometimes live in nannies get fed up with living and working in the same place and not being able to get out and meet other people. Or they feel they need to work/do sth even after their working hours. Other live in nannies just go out and do what they want to do in their free time.
But I would never say live in nannies are more reliable than live out nannies. I definitely doesn't depend on that, but on nanny's character!
All the best x

[MrsNanny]

In the nannyshare I am doing we split the time with one week at one house and one week at another. I have found this to work really well and like a mother on here has said gives the parents a rest from the drop of and pick up and allows there house a rest bite every other week. I suppose it is indivually preference to what both families would prefer. I agree with the comment about cooking and freezing to (your freezer could become quite stocked up!) but on the whole I really like the arrangement, and as the parents I work for are a road apart, it mean it works easily - if a parent wants to swap houses for the day because of packing or builders etc it's not a problem as the other house is all set up for both the children e.g, travel cot.

I found the children actually really enjoy the change of scenery, and love there "second bedroom" and bath time in a new surrounding seems exciting for them both.

Another thought is to bear in mind that if you do split the time at each house it means both parents buying a travel cot, highchair, bedding, spare teddie or comforter etc.

[BettyBoo]

Hi

I'm 3 mths into a Nannyshare and totally agree with all the advice given. We do 2 weeks on and 2 week at other house as I agree it gives the babies a variety and our home a break.

My top tip is provide as much info as possible so your Nanny is clear on expectations and she can feedback. I have a folder which includes: her job description with clearly what duties are expected to be done, agreed upfront what to do about overtime, holidays, babysitting etc. the folder also contains a page about my husband and I, what we do, a little bit about our backgrounds and what we feel passionate about, I wrote a page on our parenting wishes for our little boy eg manners are really important, independence but lots of love and fun. Activity sheets, shopping lists to let me know what we are running low on or and developmental toys/books recommended and safety requirements for the house as they get older. A few pages and photos of key family and friends and all contact numbers.

I've heard horrific stories about how Nannies are treated and I go out of my way to make sure I stick to our terms, always polite and generous and treat her how I would like to be treated. They are in your home to look after and develop the most precious thing in your life and if they are not happy neither will your children be. I'm blessed that we have found an amazing nanny who my little boy loves.

Best of luck, it's a great childcare solution and I'm loving being back at work partly because of it.