Nanny got drunk - should I be worried?

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Worriedmummy
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Re: Nanny got drunk - should I be worried?

Postby Worriedmummy » Mon May 20, 2013 5:18 pm

Thank you for all the comments and advice.

I'm not looking to nannybash but I do want to understand if a nanny getting pissed on duty, even at a party, is something I should be worried about.

I'll have a quiet word and explain how I feel, I think this will be a case of two strikes and she is out
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NannyChloe
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Re: Nanny got drunk - should I be worried?

Postby NannyChloe » Mon May 20, 2013 5:23 pm

I certainly didn't see it as nanny bashing... and I'm a nanny! Fair question, varied responses.

Hope it goes well =)
Chloe
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newmum83
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Re: Nanny got drunk - should I be worried?

Postby newmum83 » Mon May 20, 2013 5:27 pm

I totally see how this could be a worry, but I would try not to fret too much if she is a good nanny on a day to day basis - and genuinely loves the kids.
Good childcare - and a nanny you get on with - can be sooo hard to find. I agree with one of the other posters that she probably feels so comfortable with you that the boundaries have slightly blurred. In some ways, it's nice that she feels part of the family and not just a hired help.
Also - as there were lots of other adults, and other parents, she might have felt a couple of glasses was acceptable - I'm quite sure she would never have done this if she was alone with the kids.
There are so many things that could go wrong with a new nanny - I would stick with her if this is the worst thing she's done x
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Orangetree
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Re: Nanny got drunk - should I be worried?

Postby Orangetree » Mon May 20, 2013 5:39 pm

i agree with Chloe, it is after all about communication. Tell her your expectations, where she went wrong and that you will expect her to rectify. You are her employer after all so you need and if she is good with the kids then we all deserve a second chance. Good luck.
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kiwimummy
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Re: Nanny got drunk - should I be worried?

Postby kiwimummy » Mon May 20, 2013 5:48 pm

I would agree that this is likely a situation where the expectations were somewhat mixed. If you knew she was drinking at the party, then she probably thought you were fine with it. In fact, I'd probably offer our nanny a glass or two of champagne in the same situation. Your expectation would have been that she'd stop, but I think she thought she was being generally included and it was fine to drink. Best to deal with it by a friendly chat, and be very clear about her role if you hire her for any subsequent parties. It would be a shame to lose a good nanny over a misunderstanding.
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nannypj
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Re: Nanny got drunk - should I be worried?

Postby nannypj » Mon May 20, 2013 5:59 pm

I didn't say it was nanny bashing. I said people on this site are usually quite fond of it but replies this time seem to be sensible ones.
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bonnieh
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Re: Nanny got drunk - should I be worried?

Postby bonnieh » Mon May 27, 2013 12:19 pm

I'm not connected with the nanny world anymore, but remember a similar incident with a nanny when my kids were young, dreadful behaviour, very drunk, didn't feel could trust her to look after the kids from then on ... I sacked her.
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uptheoctave
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Re: Nanny got drunk - should I be worried?

Postby uptheoctave » Tue May 28, 2013 7:44 am

Yes, alcohol is ok for certain times and places but she was there as a nanny and what if you needed her to drive the children somewhere?! Alcohol is never ok if there is a chance of having to drive. If she is a non-driving nanny then fine, just tell her to tone it down a bit at parties and carry on. But if part of her duty is to drive at all then no, alcohol is never acceptable on this job.
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foodeditorjo
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Re: Nanny got drunk - should I be worried?

Postby foodeditorjo » Wed May 29, 2013 12:22 pm

I agree with kiwimummy. It may be that she isn't used to drinking and therefore got drunk more quickly. I think, in hindsight, you should have made it clear to her that she was 'on duty' and that you would therefore appreciate it if she didn't drink any alcohol. Inviting someone to join in with a party would probably lead her to think that she was free to enjoy herself.

Of course, it goes without saying, that she shouldn't drink in charge of the children, but she probably felt that on this occasion she was simply there to help out. Lines always get blurred with nannies/au pairs.
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