Delaying Reception for Summer Borns Post Reply

[usedtobeorganised]

My son is also an end of August baby - he's nearly 3 now, but I've always assumed the cut-off has to come somewhere, so 1 September seems as fair as any other date. Otherwise we're just adding to the group of oldest kids in the following year, which seems a bit unfair! I appreciate some kids have a genuine educational need to be held back but generally I think things sort themselves out as the kids get older anyway, which I'm glad to hear has been the experience of other posters here.

[WannaBe]

Thanks for that story about your friend, Ms Amanda, it's encouraging. And thanks for advice and links everyone. I'll start talking to schools and wait and see how he matures... I am less worried about him eventually catching up - I am sure he will, but am worried about his confidence if he is instantly labelled as a less capable one - even if he really isn't.

[WannaBe]

That was a very good link, kcai, looks like anything is possible...

[ellesmum]

I wouldn't worry about them being "labelled" at all! They certainly don't label any child, and they very much take into consideration that a year's difference between the oldest in the class (turning 5 at the start of Reception) and youngest (only just turned 4), at that stage of their development, is HUGE!! They account for that difference and work with them to bring them up to speed. The new system of assessment that was brought in this year has caused a few rumbles in school, because children are assessed and classed as "Advanced" (or some word along those lines), "Expected", or "Emerging" - and the "Emerging" terminology has put a few backs up for sounding a bit negative, especially because this is the category that a few of the younger ones fall into purely because they are younger! However, even with this "Emerging" category, I'm not particularly worried.
I look back at pictures of my daughter's first day of school now & she looks like a baby - and by all accounts and purposes, she WAS a baby! However, looking at the children who are the eldest in nursery, and therefore some who are mere weeks younger than my daughter, she looks and acts so much more grown up - and the only reason that could possibly be is due to the year in Reception effectively forcing her to grow up a bit quicker.
Good luck whatever you decide!

(Oh, and MrsMilk - thank you for the agreement! I'm glad I wasn't the only one!!)

[asdfghjjkl]

You know this is very common in the States, and people make the choice for a wide variety of reasons - and more often for boys.

My daughter is 31 August and in the States we made the choice to start her (thank God...it would have been really difficult when we moved here and had to force an academic jump because of the inflexibility on the issue!).

She is now going into year 9. I would say all the way up until this year the difference between her and the September births was very evident..and not just physically. I continually had to remind her (and me) when she languished in the middle of the class ability, that many of the kids were so much older and developmentally that makes a huge difference...again, not just physically but cognitively. I am just feeling that the variance is levelling out and she can truly be on par (and move to the top) with hard work.

So even if you can't or don't make the hold-back decision, keep that developmental difference in mind as you approach your son's academic, social and physical development because it will be ever present even if you both seem to stop noticing!

Thank God my other 3 kids had winter birthdays!

Good luck!

[asdfghjjkl]

I have an addendum to this question. We just moved to London two weeks ago with our 5 year old (20 July 08) and our 3 year old. My kids were in daycare in the States - and there was a "pre-school" program at the daycare but it's no where near as intense as Reception here in the UK.

We will most likely only be in the UK for 2-3 years so I won't have to face the Secondary school issues that were mentioned above... Would you still recommend starting him here at Year 1? Ugh!!

Thanks!
Jen

Jen....I have thoughts for you. We moved from the States when my son was 6 and at the end of a 1/2 kindergarten. He was thrown in with Year 1 - kids who had been in full time ed for 2 years with reading pushed far earlier than they do in the States. I(n the mean time, my 3rd grade/year4 girl had an easy transition because the difference in curriculum approaches those early years had evened out. )

My son suffered tremendously - it was a real shock to his system. He went from thinking he was Mr. Smart Science Guy to thinking (with good reason and little patience from the teachers here) that he was the dumbest guy in the class. We went through several years of working to get his confidence rebuilt while we caught up on the academics.

He is now going into year 6 and all is well, but it was a very rough few years. If you only think you are going to be here a short time (we thought that too...) it is worth giving the matter some real consideration or at least a proactive eyes-wide-open approach.

PM me if you want...I'd be happy to discuss! Good luck!

[lovemykids]

My child is born on the 1st week of August. And she is due for Reception in September 2014. We are new in the UK and she has only been in full time nursery(private) for 4 months. She is enjoying nursery and always happy and drop off and pick up times. However, her speech and language is slightly delayed, she is not too interested to write, arts and crafts and I do not think she is ready for reception at all.Her school thinks she should move forward but my gut feeling is that she will struggle as . I would like to hear of anyone else's experiences of delaying reception? Or did you go ahead? Is it an advantage for her to be with children who are 9-10 months older or is it a disadvantage?

[asdfghjjkl]

I'm not so sure you have any options in this country, unless maybe the privates allow it. I'm fairly certain the states do not.

My daughter is 31 August, so she has always been THE youngest. She started school in the States, and even though it was common there to delay, we felt she was ready (mind you, that was 1/2 day kindergarten at age 5).

We moved here when she was in YR4/3rd grade, and she has always been fine. However, many times we have had to help her realise there are reasons she always hovered around the middle, as many children had a full developmental year on her. Now that she is in year 9, the developmental variances are levelling out and she is pulling ahead.

If you already feel worried about readiness, then you should be. They start hard core on reading and writing VERY early here, and target expectations based on performance early on. There is no room for all the developmental variance that exists in ability until ages 8/9, and the kids feel their rankings very poignantly amongst their peers.

Not sure what to advise, it is a tough system for summer babies here. Tough on late bloomers.

Beyond that, my youngest, who academically was sound and a winter baby, was EXHAUSTED through year 1. She always fell asleep as soon as she got home. Mind you, year 1 is the same as kindergarten, where in the States would only be 1/2 day, and many other European countries wouldn't even be in full-time school yet. It can be tough.

Sorry to not be more positive. Good luck.

[asdfghjjkl]

I'm not so sure you have any options in this country, unless maybe the privates allow it. I'm fairly certain the states do not.

My oldest daughter is 31 August, so she has always been THE youngest. She started school in the States, and even though it was common there to delay, we felt she was ready (mind you, that was 1/2 day kindergarten at age 5).

We moved here when she was in YR4/3rd grade, and she has always been fine. However, many times we have had to help her realise there are reasons she always hovered around the middle, as many children had a full developmental year on her. Now that she is in year 9, the developmental variances are levelling out and she is pulling ahead.

If you already feel worried about readiness, then you should be. They start hard core on reading and writing VERY early here, and target expectations based on performance early on. There is no room for all the developmental variance that exists in ability until ages 8/9, and the kids feel their rankings very poignantly amongst their peers. It's kind of like expecting all babies to walk at 10 months, just cause some can.

Not sure what to advise, it is a tough system for summer babies here. Tough on late bloomers.

Beyond that, my youngest, who academically was sound and a winter baby, was EXHAUSTED through year 1. She always fell asleep as soon as she got home. Mind you, year 1 is the same as kindergarten, where in the States would only be 1/2 day, and many other European countries wouldn't even be in full-time school yet. It can be tough, they are so little.

Sorry to not be more positive. Good luck.

[annamarina]

Hi, I found reading the book "Outliers" by Malcolm Gladwell very useful to decide. Very good read.

[outnumbered]

I spotted this in the Telegraph over the weekend and when I came to post it I realised there's been lots of debate on the site already about our summer babes.

Now it seems it will be open to parents and schools to make their own decision about when a child should start school..

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/education/ed ... chool.html

[jensterx]

We ultimately decided to go private for our eldest and enter him in Reception. He is a mere 5 weeks older than 3 kids in his current class - and a full year older than one little one.

For us, it was the right decision. I realize that kids will eventually catch up - but is it really worth suffering for the first few years? I keep thinking that the main goal of education is to create competent adults. Has anyone ever asked you as an adult if you started school at age 4 or 5? It doesn't matter... I think giving the parents of summer born children the option to evaluate their child as an individual is great. You know your child best and ideally the school should be able to help you determine if your child is ready for reception or if they would benefit from one more year of nursery. By the time they're 25 - this will be a non-issue!!

We were offered at state spot in January that would have meant leaving reception to enter in Year 1. I'm sure he would have survived. And I'm sure it would mean his sister wouldn't be 38 on the list for next fall's reception -- but for the sake of our sanity and my child's mental health -- we chose to keep him in reception.

It's a tough call. Most decisions will work out fine in the end... Good luck to all those in a similar spot!