Petal - we are most certainly not alone! I have spoken to numerous mums recently who feel exactly the same. I know my child is not failing because she can't read or write at 5 years and 2 months old, and I have complete faith in her and her abilities regardless. She is a bright child who asks loads of questions (too many questions sometimes!), loves books, has a HUGE imagination, and has written several of her own books (well, dictated, obviously!) already...why should I worry?! Yes, her writing is abysmal, yes, she sounds out "f", "r', "o", "g" and still thinks it says "ship", but so what?! I know she will not leave school unable to read or write because we will not allow it to get to that stage, and I know her natural curiosity will win out soon enough and it will be like flicking a light switch. I am more concerned about nurturing her imagination and her desire to create and innovate. The reading and writing can be taught, imagination can not. I think it's a far more important quality to support, personally, but I am not sure whether our schools do that enough. Although I am sure that the teachers would like to if they had the opportunity to say "screw the targets!". Being successful isn't just about academic ability, and exam results are not the be all and end all. They help, but are they always essential? My "failure" friends who are now far more successful than me suggest otherwise!
School, and getting in as early as possible, is not always a good thing. Personally, I was put into school early (well, kindergarten, because I moved from the English system to the Canadian system at almost 5), but I instinctively felt like a bit of the odd one out. Ultimately, it didn't do me any harm and I think I benefitted a great deal from having 2 years in the kindergarten system before coming back here and entering English education in what would now be Year 2. I don't remember being behind, I could read and write, and I was also fluent in French. I lost the French because, instead of nurturing the ability to soak languages up like a sponge at that age, they didn't start teaching foreign languages until about 12 here. Too late. The English system is so incredibly flawed. It fights the natural timetable of abilities, doesn't support it!
And now, I shall jump down from my soap box!!!
Basically, Fergie, as you can see from those of us with late-borns, a lot of us are struggling. Your son may only be 6 weeks or so younger than the youngest, but he will also be almost 14 months younger than the eldest. Think how huge the difference is between a newborn and a 14 month old,and that gap doesn't close in only 4 years! My child didn't even exist as an embryo when some of her classmates had learned to sit up, and she was mastering holding her head up whilst her friends were walking and talking. It's a big gap even now, and even at this age, a lot of development can happen in 6 weeks! Your son is in a great position to be a leader and an inspiration to the children younger than him, capitalise on that!