If you could offer me one piece of advice, what would it be? Post Reply

[2boysmum]

We got one of those rocking cradle swings for our unsettled one. He practically did all his sleeps in it. It was a life saver. And don't panic a bit that being a "habit" - he didn't sleep in it forever and it got us through the rough bits. My first baby did all his afternoon naps till he was three in a buggy. We kept the buggy in his room but it also provided us the flexibility to go out for lunch etc. He would do a full three hours in it. My point is do whatever works, and if nothing is working just make sure you have someone who can help you around- husband, friend, doula , babysitter etc so you can step away, breathe and realise it's not always going to be like that. EVERYONE has bad days and weeks with babies. And never never never compare yourself with anyone else and their baby. I enjoyed my first baby the most because I had never read a single book, had no expectations and didn't know what a routine was. When you are ready for a routine, whether that's after 3 days or 3 months then is the time to do it, but because you want it, not anyone else. Just be aware that forcing it too early might make you feel you are failing when you are not. Let those days just go when the baby just needs to cry. He/she has no other way of communicating, but it sure is brutal on you. Go easy on yourself...

[Nicnak]

After endless days and nights - often crying more than my baby and trying gina, baby whisperer etc I hired in help- it turned out it wasn't the routine it was that my baby wasn't comfortable. The maternity nurse gave me the confidence to try new things as I could only find out things i shouldn't be doing! She said to stop reading books and to read my baby! It turns out my baby is a side sleeper (using a sleep wedge so she couldn't roll over) swaddled really tightly with a dummy. All no no's according to my books but it literally changed our lives overnight. The maternity nurse also put her in her own room from 8 weeks so I learnt not to jump up every time she made a noise.

Just keep trying new things and don't ever think you've cracked it as every stage is a "phase" the good and the bad ones.

I'm now 8 months in with a through the nighter who happily sleeps in her cot without a dummy (and there wasn't the dramatic battle to give it up that I was led to believe - that's because they are all different. Good luck

[2boysmum]

We also slept our first on his side ! A breast feeding counsellor showed us how to do it so he was literally wedged in and couldn't roll anywhere. Try do it in the neo natal wards, but if you try it do make sure you are shown how to do it just for your own peace of mind. I think some babies hate that vulnerable feeling of lying on their back after being so cosy in the womb, but as the previous poster says all babies are different and you have to read your own (although that's harder than it sounds!). My second baby slept in a bouncy chair because he preferred the slightly upright position. Really there's a lot of trial and error along with an acceptance that there will be great phases and super crap phases. Never be smug or in despair as it may all change at any minute! Wishing you the best of luck..

[2boysmum]

Nb I meant THEY do it in the neo natal wards, versus suggesting that you pop in there yourself to give it a try!

[Roo4982]

Trust yourself, you will know your baby better than anyone else by the end of day one! Definitely try to sleep when baby sleeps....make the most of your partners paternity leave and sleep/ get them to take baby out for a walk so you can switch off and nap. I didn't do this as I felt euphoric for weeks but I wish I'd made the most of the help.
Try to have skin on skin with your baby after birth....for as long as possible. I did 10 hours and it was wonderful! Very good for encouraging breast feeding too. Enjoy, take time to sit and be, to cuddle and sniff them! They grow up SO quickly but it does just get better and better.

[rooting4tooting]

the first child really benefits from routine. come 8pm, we used to lower the lights in the lounge and put some music on, like "chilled Ibiza" and at the agreed hour put our baby to bed. sounds nice and it worked.
however, the second child got dragged up... so perhaps the calming music served to relax us, the adults...

[SamJo]

Trust your instincts and don't let anyone make you feel guilty or that what you' re doing is wrong. Different cultures and people all bring babies up differently so what is unnatural to one is common sense to another. Trust yourself... In every facet of their life.

Oh. And get good food delivered!!