Should we pay son not to work so he can study for A levels? Post Reply

[teen mum]

Hoping that someone can help me sort this.  

Our eldest is nearly 18 and wants to get a job so that he has money for clothes, going out etc. I am all in favour, I had a job at his age.  

My husband, however, who is very traditional and places a lot of emphasis on academics doesn't think employment in the upper sixth is acceptable. 

He thinks he should be doing 6 or 7 hours of work per day on weekend plus sport and he simply doesn't have time to do this and work.

My son, who will be 18 at the start of the academic year, says it's up to him and he's starting to look for work.

My husband thinks that this is ridiculous and I'm not sure how we square the circle, 

My son, only  half-seriously, said that he'd be prepared to not work if we made up the wages but if not then it's his life and he's going to work.

Could we pay him an enhanced allowance? On the one hand it's an obvious solution on the other I do worry that it's a cop out?

[waltzer]

I would say no way! He should get a job, earn the money and enjoy having the money to spend. With the greatest respect to your husband and his emphasis on academics that seems way too many hours for a child to be studying over a weekend. They do need downtime to recharge etc. a job would help with this, change of environment etc.

[Moimza]

The experience he gets from working could be as, if not more, valuable than academics. Good on him for showing initiative and wanting to work. What sort of message does it give him if you pay him to do nothing? I would fully support him if I were you.

[Needcoffeenow]

Presumably your husband is keen for him to go to uni and to do that he will need to write a Personal Statement. Experience of working in the real world will strengthen this. Not to have done any proper, paid work at his age can look a bit odd. And any experience of work gained now, however humble, will help in building a strong CV for when he job hunts as a (hopefully) graduate.

[Mumof4teens]

My son has just finished his first year at uni and couldn't work during A levels due to lockdowns etc - he's now struggling to find holiday work because he doesn't have experience (he is not allowed (uni rules) a job during term time)....

My daughter worked until the Easter holidays before her A levels - she's happily returned to her (relatively) well paid retail job now she has finished.

I would say that if he has the drive to do it, and is able to keep up with his school work, let him have a go. I don't think paying him not to work is a good idea IMO. Having a part time job teaches them so much and helps with their self confidence (and job prospects in the uni holidays...I'm facing 15 weeks with a bored, unemployed 19 yr old on my hands...!)

[2009Kat]

My parents did this for me when I was a teenager. However the difference was I already had a Saturday job. I would go out Friday evening clubbing (this was the north in the 90s) then work all day Sat. When I was doing my GCSEs my parents paid me to stop the job for a few weeks (but didn’t seem to have a problem with the Friday evening underage clubbing…).

The teenage job taught me a lot about life, people, perspective and graft. I’d have done as well academically with or without the job to be honest.

Let the kid take a job!

[Pluto]

I would 100% be encouraging him to work. If he feels he can juggle his A Level studies and have a work commitment at the same time, then let him. My 15 year old daughter does waitress work and has learnt so much about ‘the real world’ - and she’s getting paid well so sees the benefits! Personally I think being able to put paid job experience at a young age on your CV is invaluable.

[SWtastic]

Please encourage your son to get a job.  Both of my second year at uni DCs have worked from the age of 16 and have gained invaluable experience about the workplace (conduct, customer service etc.) as well as earning good money.  This has also enabled them to go for higher paid roles while at uni, as they have experience behind them, and this summer has funded a lot of travel. 

They did well at GCSEs and A Levels, and school encouraged them to work as it's another string to their bow when applying for uni/apprenticeships etc., and shows motivation as well as a developing work ethic.

Your son could always sign up with one of the hospitality agencies such as Host, High Society or Hap and then pick and choose when he wants to work i.e. he could stop when he has mocks or exams, and then pick it up again afterwards.
 

[aa_mummy]

I’m with your husband and rather children study than work. You could pay him for the hours put into study and in the holidays he could get a job, just not work term time. At your sons age they definitely need extra money for clothes and going out with friends and it’s a good compromise. And he can add holiday work to personal statement, along with sports commitments. I worked while at school as well and liked earning my own money, but doing it outside of term time would be better than stretching an already busy schedule while at school with sports already in the mix. Universities are much harder to get into so he really needs the grades if that is what he wants to do. Good luck to you all.