Au pair - how to find? how much to pay? Post Reply

[MamanMummy]

I would like to get an au pair to help with my four children - I am a full-time mum but with four under 6 including a newborn, I do need an extra pair of hands in the mornings and evenings. I would be interested by people's experiences on how they found their au-pairs; and how much they pay for them, as I really have no clue. Thanks!

[Stigi]

I recently got an au pair as I have 3 children aged 4 years, 3 years and 5 months. I used http://www.aupair-world.net/ as I didnt want to pay agency fees but I have to say it was very time consuming. You have to write a bit of blurb about yourself and the family, where you live what you're looking for etc and then sift through all the applications - I think we had over 250!

I think that there are lots of positive things from having an au pair (an extra pair of hands for example, help with drop off at school, nursery run, watching the baby whilst you take the older ones to activities, helping with bathtime etc) but you need to weigh them up against the not so good things (you have someone living in your house - which I dont actually mind as she is on another floor with her own bathroom but I know it bothers some people).

My au pair hadn't au paired before so you literally have to train them. Dont assume that they will come in and do exactly as you want. I have to spell out exactly what I want from my au pair and if I do she is fantastic and does it, but she doesnt really use her initiative (this would obvioulsy vary from person to person) eg I have now told her that if she sees something that needs doing eg washing up in the sink, bins need changing, folding clothes from the dryer etc it would be great if she could do it as it would really help me out basically the kind of things she would do to help her mum out. I write a weekly email outlining her hours and what I want her to do.

Good luck
x

[brihoney]

Hi, I'm new to this too, but we had our first one starting in Sept which didn't quite work out, and have another one just started.

I did it through the website http://www.aupair-world.net/
although I've also been recommended:
http://www.greataupairs.co.uk/

I posted an add on both without paying, but you then have to pay a reg fee when you want to contact the au pairs you are interested in. I found I was more interested in the au pairs on 'aupair-world' and I found it easier to get a feel for what they were like through the information the site asks them to post.

From doing online searches I found that the 'normal' deal for an aupair in london would be (and this is what I offer):
£80 /week + an oyster card (we did bus pass only) + a sim card and old phone with some cash on it for them to top up
They then do 25 hrs/week + 2 nights babysitting
I also said they would get the equivalent of 4weeks/yr paid holiday (but dates to be agreed for when convenient - they pay for travel to/from UK)

I'd be interested to see what other people are offering.

We selected some and interviewed on Skype
Other advice I'd give is do try to talk to a number of candidates. You might also want to think about what is your priority, it would be great to find someone who is really warm and fun with the children and who is also really organised and helpful round the house, but you are talking of an untrained your person not a professional nanny, so you are unlikely to get everything on your wish list, decide what is most important for you.

Personally I preferred to go with someone who really loves children and I hope I can train her up to do helpful.

We were also a bit apprehensive of having an extra person in our small-ish 3 bed house with already 2 adults and 2 children, but as me and my husband are both from big families, it feels very natural and I actually think the house is feels more like a family home now.

Hope that helps, good luck!

PS I've just seen Stigi's post and I agree with what she has put - when reviewing applicants, be ruthless, if the profile doesn't pop out and say 'I'm brilliant' if you're thinking 'hmm, maybe she might be ok' just click on to the next. Its like finding the perfect partner, a lot of people might seem like they might be right, but you know straight away when you've found the right one. If they haven't got the care and attention to fill in the application form well, then they won't have the care you need to help with your precious ones...

[lamj1974]

Hi All

We found our first au pair who stayed with us for 16 months from Gumtree. We have just found another au pair through the same method. I agree, Au Pair world is good - but there is SO much choice & so time consuming. The great thing about Gumtree is that they respond knowing they live in London etc.

We quite like having girls with no au pair experience as they seem so eager & keen. And as long as they've had some experience with kids then we've had good experiences. I think my advice would be to be honest with exactly what you want from the off. I've also said that i don't want someone having dinner with us and that seems to be fine!

We pay £100 + £30 a week for food - just so i don't have to get involved with cooking for them. Although obviously they use all our milk, bread etc.

Our first au pair has become a great friend of the family and i think if you treat them properly and remember that they are NOT nannies - they are an extra pair of hands.

Good Luck!

[severavw@gmail.com]

I highly recommend Harmony Nannies whom we used. It is more expensive, but she does all the footwork for you and found us really great au pairs.

[lknappen]

I have found two au pairs through this agency: http://www.childint.co.uk/. It was important for me to use an agency because I wanted to make sure they were fully vetted and I had multiple reference checks I could call to make sure they were legitimate. The agency is also good about laying out rules for both the host family and the au pair.

When looking for my first au pair, I reached out to multiple different agencies that were listed on the British Au Pair Agency Association directory (http://www.bapaa.org.uk/directory.asp?page=20) and Childcare International was the best in terms of furnishing me with potential applicants that fit my criteria. Both times I have not been disappointed. They also have a section on questions you would want to ask potential au pairs when you interview them over Skype (a must do when interviewing, you want to know how comfortable they are with speaking in English off the cuff, not in a heavily edited 'why I want to be an au pair' form letter).

We pay our au pair 90 + oyster card and take care of all of her meals at home.

We are lucky that the au pair bedroom is on a different floor and as such we rarely see her. If your set-up is different, you have to realize the implications of having a non-family member sleeping so close by.

I've met several au pairs now who have been treated like slaves with other families. It is very important to treat them with respect, make sure they have their free time so that they are enjoying London and immersing themselves in the language, and that they are decently paid - then they will go above and beyond the call of duty when looking after your children which is of course the most important thing. Do remember that they are NOT qualified nannies and should not be left with all 4 children probably ever - or if at all, for a very short period of time.

[Minatoku]

We found our Au Pair throught the site Au Pair World. The first one was a complete disater (even though she had amazing references and we had met her face to face).
The 2nd one started today.
We pay her £140 a week including food + 4 weeks paid holidays + 1 sick week.
In return she is aked to work for 30h max a week and to babysit max twice a week but realistically that never happens.
Hope that helps !

Minatoku.

[CHT]

I haven't hired an au pair, but just to say that you need to makes sure that they have the right to work in the UK, otherwise you could be in trouble for employing someone illegally. You can specify in your ad that they must be able to live and work in the UK, then check this is the case when you meet them.