Refusing to sleep in cot - help! Post Reply

[ktk]

Hello, I am desperate for advice.

My 17 month old normally loves to sleep in the cot and squirms to be put down and is asleep before leaving the room. 4 nights ago he woke and screamed for 2 and a half hours before I brought him into bed with me. I had tried to settle him a few times eventually leaving him to cry which has worked in the past, but not this time.

Since that night, at lunchtime nap and night time he will just stand and scream like the cot's on fire until I get him up (my breaking point is one hour). So, for the last 3 nights he has slept in bed with me, fairly soundly, with my poor husband upstairs.

He is showing all the signs of teething which may be putting him out of sorts, but I am so confused about this and normally have an idea of how to deal with problems. He tenses as soon as you go near his room now, and the strangest thing is that is the complete opposite of how he usually is.

Has anyone experienced anything like this? Any advice? I don't know whether to ride it out for a week and hope when teeth come he reverts back to the cot, or am I just making it worse by allowing him in bed?

Thank you for any advice at all!!! x

[cosmopolitanmum]

Hi there
Poor you! You must be very tired. It sounds like a phase to me (esp as he has always been very good in the cot) Children always behave differently when they are teething/ unwell. Can you try going to him and comforting him but putting him back in the cot, rather into your bed? That way he feels secure that you are there, but understands he has to sleep in his cot and not in your bed.
We actually moved our little daughter into her own bed at about 17 months. She has a bed guard and sleeps much better as she can move around more.
I think with your little one it sounds like a phase so try and be patient as I think it will pass.
Good luck!!

[schoolgatesmum]

18 months is also the age that children start becoming self aware. So this is often the age when they start getting "separation anxiety". This could be why your toddler suddenly doesn't want to be in the cot - it's not the cot itself, it's the fact that you're not in it! Reassurance is the key - however you want to do it. Bringing your child into bed with you is the ultimate reassurance but for some can be a pain (I find it very difficult to sleep with one of my children even in the same room as me!). Other reassurance could be sitting in the room and gradually moving out, or making reassuring noises from just outside the room. Whatever works for you really. It will pass once you're toddler realises that you aren't abandoning him/her but be prepared - it may take some time! Let's face it, wouldn't most children want to have Mummy on tap! Good luck!

[emsken]

perhaps he is scared of the dark?

[ktk]

Thank you ladies.. I put the blow up mattress beside the cot last night and he slept in the cot all night with a few wake ups and lots of pats. So a big step from being in bed with me and hopefully I'll make it back to my own bed soon!

[susiep23]

hey, the last post is what i was going to suggest in that you reassure him from being in the room even having a matress, blow up bed for you'reself to sooth him but not to put him in you're bed or not a few nights in a row i mean or he will become too accustomed to this and may be tricky habit to break.

As someone else has said i feel this is a phase too as a lady i babysit for her twins went through a similar phase at around 16mths and she did the same as you have over the weekend when the boys were particualarly cranky /teething and sensitive to being left in their rooms but it passed so don't worry you're doing the right thing