If you could offer me one piece of advice, what would it be? Post Reply

[firsttimerSW11]

I'm a first time mum to be and basically I am wondering, if you could give me one tip or bit of advice that you were given that you found invaluable during the first few months/year of your baby's life, what would it be?

Can be anything at all, fun, serious or trivial, I'd love to hear it.
Thank you all in advance

[tooposhtopush]

Fill your freezer full of gorgeous tasty meals that are easy and quick to serve up You will be so glad of them in those first few days / weeks!

[hjm]

Don't feel guilty if during the first few weeks of motherhood you wonder if you've done the right thing. I thought it after both my children are born, but now I wouldn't change it for the world. Based on conversations I've had after the event it's amazing how many people feel the same way, but don't say anything at the time as they think they are abnormal.

[juliantenniscoach]

Try not to panic, don't believe the hype, grab as many kisses and cuddles and special moments as you can. Best wishes.

[cheshirecat]

Babies grow up really quickly, so don't stress if it takes years before you sleep a whole night through or endless months before they potty train. It won't be long before you'll be trying to wake them up in the morning and constantly asking them to flush the loo when they've finished.

Don't stress the small stuff and enjoy every second.

[audrey]

Try to sleep when the baby sleeps.

[kishi]

Take a 'babymoon' in the first couple of weeks. Lots of time relaxing with your baby and partner, getting breastfeeding established (if that's what you're choosing to do), recovering from birth and getting to know eachother. Limit visitors to ones you actually want (this is no time to worry about offending people), and make sure they don't stay too long. Do not even think about replying to emails, getting dressed, leaving the house, let alone housework, etc etc, until you're absolutely ready to (which may be weeks!).

For when they're a bit older - I think Baby Led Weaning is probably the thing I knew least about when I had my first, but became the biggest fan of. Made months 6-12 so much fun and (in my view) based on a great philosophy too.

Enjoy it, good luck!

[Mrs Contractor Mum]

Apparently the first 30 years are the hardest, after that it gets easier. 27 years to go......
Seriously though, try not to stress the little stuff and if someone offers to help the answer is always 'yes'!

[instablonde]

Teach the baby to sleep through the night and fall sleep alone from first day he/she is born. Never sleep with your baby in bed. Best way to do baby's sleep training is to hire a maternity nurse. It is the best thing I have ever spent money on.

[HannaMatNurse]

I'm 100% agreeing with 'zoesmum' above. Your baby will love her full nights sleeps, and so will you of course. Im a maternity nurse working in sleep consultancy and I meet so many poorly, exhausted, depressed parents who are getting expensive sleepconsultancy sessions when the baby is a year old and not sleeping through. All you have to do, is to do it right from the beginning!!! and there will be no need for any of that. Get a maternity nurse to stay with you for the first weeks and show her how to teach your baby to sleep without ever lever her to cry it out!
(Just to say I'm fully booked, not trying to get work, it's just honestly my best advice!)

[ckwmum]

My tip would be - don't listen to anyone who offers advice! People will literally stop you in the street and tell you exactly what you should be doing/not doing to your baby and it's all about validating what they themselves did. Do whatever feels right for you.

[lemonzest]

I wish I'd known about safe co-sleeping before my baby arrived! I was far too lazy to bottle feed, and was very lucky that breastfeeding turned out to be straightforward. However I would very much have preferred to have been rolling over to feed a baby in a side cot than sitting up in the cold in the night/going into another room to feed and then trying to get them to settle back in a cold cot of their own. Horses for courses. Everyone is different. I take the view that everyone has to do what suits them and their baby/family. Enjoy!

[MrsMak]

My main piece of advice is don't do anything that you're not willing to do every day for the next 6 months. It's not always best to take what may appear to be the easy option because if you do it today, then tomorrow, it soon becomes a habit that can be difficult to break.

For example, if you do not intend to co-sleep with your baby longer-term, don't allow the baby to sleep in your bed at all. Or if you don't want to have to breastfeed your baby to sleep every night, just feed, wind, pop him down & give him time to learn how to self-settle. Conversely, if you breastfeed but want to use the bottle occasionally, introduce it after 6 weeks and use it 3 x per week so it's not a surprise to baby when you need to use it. These are all mistakes that I made with my first - wish someone had warned me!


The other thing I would say, that I have learnt since having a 2nd, is to not always go to baby straight away when he cries - I often found that by the time I'd finished dealing with my toddler (wiping bum/cleaning sick/plaster on scraped knee etc etc) baby had stopped crying and was happy.

Finally, I would say there are a lot of things that you end up buying but don't really need (or certainly don't need brand new!).... my personal list would include feeding/rocking chair for mum, changing unit, swaddling blanket, fancy high chair, bumbo chair, fancy baby clothes, soft toys, cot mobile, cot quilt, fancy bouncy chair, breastfeeding pillow, bottle warmer. What you do need lots of are baby grows & vests, muslin squares, spare bed sheets, nipple cream, breast pump and calpol.

Good luck!

[falconmum]

I am with MrsMak ...

All the best!!!

[Minnie]

NEVER WAKE A SLEEPING BABY BETWEEN THE HOURS OF 7&7!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NEVER LISTEN TO A MIDWIFE WHEN THEY SAY FEED EVERY 3 HOURS!!!!!!!!!!!

Your babies brain is a blank canvas and from DAY 1 you help train it.