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Re: Husband has visited escort- advice please

by Annabel (admin) » Thu Jan 07, 2021 10:48 am

Hi firstimerSW11,
Thank you so much for your post.

I promise you that I am still here and working daily on NappyValleyNet. 

I hear what you are saying regarding zombie alerts but it is a tricky one.

We get a lot of new users who come to the site and 'search' for topics that they are interested such as 'schools' or 'areas to live' or in this case 'husband visited an escort'. They then add to the old thread  as they are in the swing of it all when starting another thread in reality be better.

Thank you again for taking time to post and I will see if there is a alternative way of dealing with these older posts and situations!


Annabel x

Re: Husband has visited escort- advice please

by firsttimerSW11 » Thu Jan 07, 2021 9:59 am

@admin can you not put a zombie thread alert on threads over a year old?
This forum used to be widely used in the area and now it’s like no one runs it any more. Such a shame, I used to find it invaluable.

Re: Husband has visited escort- advice please

by ronangel » Thu Jan 07, 2021 8:13 am

A marriage or partnership has give and take and is about loving in both directions. When one partner wants to engage/experiment in a sexual practice the other does not for whatever reason after many attempts and being together for a long time and to avoid friction in the relationship the partner will go elsewhere for this practice so as not to upset the partner with someone that will do it not loving the partner any less. Lucky in this case a professional was found who will partake in this practice rather than meeting someone who will do for love and lose partner forever.

Re: Husband has visited escort- advice please

by verounan » Fri Feb 10, 2017 3:53 pm

@supergirl: I agree with you. If you can't control yourself when having sex, you're nowhere far from being an animal. I believe sex is not a necessity but rather a decision for both of you and your partner. If a person thinks that it's okay for a husband to sleep with an escort, then you're the one that has a problem. :mrgreen:

Re: Husband has visited escort- advice please

by supergirl » Sun Feb 14, 2016 10:04 am

@Roxron: the difference between human kind and animal is our ability to control our desire/emotions and to remember the past so we can forward think. It s the same with sex. We re not animal, we should be able to control ourselves (thats what we teach our kids) and live in a RESPECTFUL relationship.

Re: Husband has visited escort- advice please

by Roxron » Sun Feb 14, 2016 8:03 am

This may just be a bit too out there but surely when it comes to sex we should at least consider that individuals are likely to have different desires? I don't just mean how often we like it, although that's important too, but in what style.
I'm not forgiving anyone who strays but don't want to judge them straight away either. Sex can be a far more vital part of daily life for one person than it is for another. If one partner in a relationship chooses something a little '50 shades' but the other partner would rather not indulge should the first miss out? And if after the routine of life kicks in to a previously rampant relationship, and twice a day is now twice a month, one partner isn't happy to just settle for that and still needs the physical satisfaction, couldn't they find that elsewhere?
We're not all cut from the same cloth and in most aspects of life that's what makes us interesting and makes our relationships work. Sadly with sex though to be different can drive you apart and it's up to us whether we let it or instead try and understand it.

Re: Husband has visited escort- advice please

by Astolat » Sat Feb 13, 2016 12:15 pm

I don't see why the choice is put up and shut up or lone parent?

I have a very low opinion of any man who exploits sex workers but surely even they are capable of either choosing to control themselves or co parenting following a divorce.

Re: Husband has visited escort- advice please

by juliantenniscoach » Sun Feb 07, 2016 9:33 pm

@Nannyjoy. That is one of the best posts I've read here.

Re: Husband has visited escort- advice please

by NannyJoy » Sun Feb 07, 2016 1:40 pm

You can't trust people who can't trust themselves- I doubt there's a counsellor on earth able to stimulate a response from your husband comparable to the thrill of paid for sexual services.
"Getting forensic" sounds like a bitter, tedious waste of time.
People pay a cleaner when they can't be bothered to clean their house themselves- even though the skill set's hardly complex!
Have a good hard think about your position, your tolerances and your alternative prospects, then decide. Some women have been putting up and shutting up since the dawn of time, others have been single parenting.
There's likely no easy/right option....so be true to yourself and accept whichever associated challenges graciously.

Re: Husband has visited escort- advice please

by Lauren99 » Thu Feb 04, 2016 4:01 pm

Wow I am so sorry to hear, It must be hard but you need to do what's best for you and of course your kids :D

Re: Husband has visited escort- advice please

by Lauren99 » Thu Feb 04, 2016 4:01 pm

Wow I am so sorry to hear, It must be hard but you need to do what's best for you and of course your kids :D

Re: Husband has visited escort- advice please

by TerryJones91 » Wed Feb 03, 2016 4:37 pm

From a mans point of view he may not see it as cheating and just sex.. You got to look at it as if you have two kids maybe you are getting less time in the bedroom department thus he is finding new ways to keep himself sexually active without losing any love for you.. It may sound stupid but it is highly possible and it isn't the first time this has happened :roll:

Re: Husband has visited escort- advice please

by SarahR90 » Wed Feb 03, 2016 3:55 pm

I am so sorry to hear..It's hard I have had the same problem with my husband but instead of finishing it we sat down picked up all the broken pieces put them back together and we are now getting on for our 20th anniversary... You need to sit down with him and find out the truth and work from there :D

Re: Husband has visited escort- advice please

by LuluDaffodil » Tue Jul 07, 2015 1:57 pm

Very nice article.

Re: Husband has visited escort- advice please

by sw11_ » Sat Jul 04, 2015 9:34 pm

It's a very different post to the vile one in the Daily Mail. It's kind of complimentary:

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/women/sex/on ... emind.html

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