Online dating: divorced, mum: should I try it?

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PlentyofFish
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Online dating: divorced, mum: should I try it?

Postby PlentyofFish » Thu Jun 11, 2015 8:20 pm

Hello All
Different username for obvious reasons :-)

I've been single for two years, divorce all sorted, relationship with ex is OK, children seem settled and I'm now starting to think about dating again.

I'm in my late thirties and it's been a looooooong time since I did any dating/flirting with someone other than my ex and don't know where to start.

Everyone seems to tell me that I have to go online now, and I do see that might be the case as it's pretty hard to meet unattached Dads at the school gate, but I wondered if anyone had found any sites that are more pre-disposed towards women with children.

I don't want to put my children in a Tinder photo :-) and kinda think that is the wrong target market (euurrgghhh horrid words but you know what I mean).

any ideas?

anyone with friends who've done this?
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tooposhtopush
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Re: Online dating: divorced, mum: should I try it?

Postby tooposhtopush » Thu Jun 11, 2015 9:36 pm

Ahem, I have a friend who...

Seriously I do.

She did find someone but had to be pretty thick skinned, there are a lot of jerks out there.

So I think it works but you have to be ready.

I'll ask her where she went.

Good luck!

X
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vendredimanche
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Re: Online dating: divorced, mum: should I try it?

Postby vendredimanche » Thu Jun 11, 2015 11:20 pm

A widowed friend of mine (in her early 40s, 3 boys) met a wonderful divorced dad of 3 online. They're about to move in together and it is a really heartwarming story. He was the first person she m after her venture on the site so she didn't have to do it for long!!
She had not dated since Uni - and as a widow she was even more reluctant to join the dating scene. But there are still gentlemen out there!
Happy fishing!
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PlentyofFish
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Re: Online dating: divorced, mum: should I try it?

Postby PlentyofFish » Fri Jun 12, 2015 6:24 am

Thank you, wonderful to hear :-)
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Mrs Contractor Mum
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Re: Online dating: divorced, mum: should I try it?

Postby Mrs Contractor Mum » Fri Jun 12, 2015 9:38 am

If you are ready for it then go for it. A friend of mine who was a divorced met his new wife using internet dating - I think it was through match and he's now been married for 3 years and they both still update facebook with lots of soppy messages about how much they love each other :D
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LP73
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Re: Online dating: divorced, mum: should I try it?

Postby LP73 » Fri Jun 12, 2015 10:18 pm

Four sets of friends have met and married online. It's such a great way to meet people.

I've asked a friend who is onlin dating and said that If you are serious about meeting someone who is like minded try eHarmony.com really sensible website with the most genuine of people on there.
Tinder tends to be a sh*g fest ......

Go and have fun :-)
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PlentyofFish
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Re: Online dating: divorced, mum: should I try it?

Postby PlentyofFish » Fri Jun 12, 2015 10:22 pm

Thank you for all the great advice

Tinder sounds fun but not quite my cup of tea in real life :twisted:

:-)
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MrsAmanda
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Re: Online dating: divorced, mum: should I try it?

Postby MrsAmanda » Mon Jun 15, 2015 7:26 am

Do it!

Just remember to be a bit selective, keep your wits about you and that old adage about kissing a lot of frogs isn't far from the truth :)

I did internet dating for years, until a decade ago I met the man who is now my husband. At the time, a site called MidsummersEve was quite a good one. Not all 20yr olds just after a shag. I've no idea if it still exists, though, not checked.

Have fun dipping your toes in the water again :)
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vicandandrew
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Re: Online dating: divorced, mum: should I try it?

Postby vicandandrew » Mon Jun 15, 2015 8:26 am

Definitely do it.

I met my partner and father of my two girls online 5 years ago and I know lots of other couples who have done the same. I have to warn you though, it's not always great fun and can be disheartening at times as there will be men you contact who don't reply or people with perfect looking profiles online who are a big old disappointment in real life. You just have to be patient though as it will definitely be worth it in the end.

I think its best to see it as a process to go through to meet the man of your dreams. I know that doesn't sound very romantic but I promise that when you do meet him, it will be just as romantic as meeting him any other way.

As far as sites go, I don't know any that are specifically for mums but my 37 year old friend has been on Match, E harmony and Happn (a dating App) and she's been in contact with lots of dads.

Good luck!
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lalectrice
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Re: Online dating: divorced, mum: should I try it?

Postby lalectrice » Mon Jun 15, 2015 9:01 am

Go for it! I met my husband via online dating and know several other long-term/married couples who also met this way. It is a totally normal and logical way to meet new people, especially when you're in your 30s or 40s and your social and work circles are pretty fixed. My husband lived in a different part of London and works in a different industry and we would simply never have met any other way. Even if you don't meet Mr Right, it's a great way to meet interesting new people for enjoyable (or at least anecdote-worthy!) dates. Good luck!
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maryd
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Re: Online dating: divorced, mum: should I try it?

Postby maryd » Mon Jun 15, 2015 9:10 am

Absolutely YES - two of my divorced friends met lovely partners on line (both through Guardian soul mates) - one is getting married soon - they did meet a few not so great ones first but persevered! Wishing you all the best :D
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NYE31
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Re: Online dating: divorced, mum: should I try it?

Postby NYE31 » Mon Jun 15, 2015 10:48 am

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monaco
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Re: Online dating: divorced, mum: should I try it?

Postby monaco » Mon Jun 15, 2015 2:15 pm

Didn't meet my husband that way but used to do online dating many years ago and would definitely recommend you to do it.

I found it particularly useful to "get back into the game" and "practice" after a long time not dating (as in practice flirting, banter etc...). You might not meet the man of your life but it will build your confidence, give you funny stories to tell your friends and set you on the right path to be open to meet all different kind of persons in other circumstances.

Just one word of advice: always tell people who you're going to meet and where. Arrange to have a friend calling you at a certain time during the date so that you can have a pre-arranged excuse to leave if the date is getting VERY boring or awkward.

Have fun!
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PlentyofFish
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Re: Online dating: divorced, mum: should I try it?

Postby PlentyofFish » Mon Jun 15, 2015 3:04 pm

Thanks all.

Going to give it a go, will keep you posted :-)
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millymoo
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Re: Online dating: divorced, mum: should I try it?

Postby millymoo » Mon Jun 15, 2015 5:19 pm

Good luck plenty of fish!...I think this has come up before but Annabel - how about an dating section on Nappyvalleynet? I have a single friend who is keen to meet someone and has tried an agency but no luck so far...
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