sleeping with a snoring wife

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ineedmysleep
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sleeping with a snoring wife

Postby ineedmysleep » Fri Apr 16, 2021 10:59 am

Hoping that someone can help. Over the last few months my wife has started snoring and it is really affecting my sleep. I have taken myself off to the spare room a couple of times but that has really upset her and she wants me to wear earplugs. I have tried this but to be honest they aren't helping the situation that much. I really don't want to offend or upset her but I can see that this is going to become an issue for me. How do people cope who have snoring partners? Any suggestions on coping or addressing snoring much appreciated..
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Tigger
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Re: sleeping with a snoring wife

Postby Tigger » Fri Apr 16, 2021 6:43 pm

I can totally relate to this.  My wife doesn't necessarily snore, she just breathes really loudly!! It doesn't help that I'm also a really light sleeper and generally only get 5 or 6 hours a night.

We looked at all sorts of solutions, not drinking (OK, cutting down drinking!), sleep positions, weight fluctuations, exercise routines and so on - so many different things.  In the end we figured out that there was no particular one thing that made it worse, although weight gain on her part (not a massive amount, but even a small amount made a huge difference), and burning the candle at both ends (for both of us) was a big part of it.  I'd have to say that I'm also far from perfect, but obviously I don't keep myself awake when I snore.

It really helped that we both talked about it on a sensible level - neither of us want to sleep apart so we had to find a solution.  My amazing wife now uses nose strips, and I have some ear plugs to hand where necessary, and this has certainly helped.  Even ear plugs can be very different - I can't get on with most of them, but Quies seem to work really well and don't leave me feeling like I've had a cork stuck in my ear all night.  They seem to allow some sound transmission through so I can hear higher pitch sounds through them, but lower snoring sounds are filtered out.

Happy to have a chat about it if you like - feel free to PM me if you want to...
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Needcoffeenow
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Re: sleeping with a snoring wife

Postby Needcoffeenow » Mon Apr 19, 2021 6:34 am

Agree weight can be the crucial factor. My husband starts snoring again as soon as he gains a few pounds and stops as soon as he loses them. Some drops of Oil of Olbas on tissue near the bed also help keep airways free, if you can bear the smell!
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SW13twinsmum
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Re: sleeping with a snoring wife

Postby SW13twinsmum » Mon Apr 19, 2021 7:27 am

Hi, you could also look at the Snoozeal device, which is a device you use during the day to strengthen the tongue and is the only non-invasive medical device approved by the FDA in the US for mild sleep apnoea.

https://uk.exciteosa.com/

Hope that helps.
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drstrangelove
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Re: sleeping with a snoring wife

Postby drstrangelove » Mon Apr 19, 2021 8:02 am

Hello - I had the same exact problem being a light sleeper with my husband who snores and also tosses and turns a lot, which wakes me up even if he isn't snoring. After much experimentation of different devices, the following has brought huge success:

1. Invest in custom silicone earplugs. This was the turning point, as I have very sensitive ears which would start to hurt after a few hours of wearing commercial earplugs from the shops (foam, silicone, etc). Much like when you go to the dentist and they take am impression of your teeth - a professional audiologist does so with your ears, and within a week they provide you with ones that fit you perfectly and last around 2-3 years. You will need to replace them that often but it is worth it. Happy to point you in the right direction to get these done, the clinic is in Harley Street. 

2. White noise machine - we have one in our bedroom. Together with my wearing the earplugs, it both cuts out random loud 'snorts' and. Search for 'Marpac Dohm Classic White Noise Sound Machine with UK Plug, White' on Amazon UK.

3. For anyone who is woken up by a partner who moves around at night, I highly recommend investing in two separate single mattresses within a superking bed base. It's what they often do in hotels, and it means both are able to move around as little/often without bothering the other. Even better, replace the shared cover/duvet and have two single ones. For anyone saying this feels excessive, it beats sleeping in separate rooms. 

Good luck!
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NoodleFan
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Re: sleeping with a snoring wife

Postby NoodleFan » Mon Apr 19, 2021 8:26 am

This post has come at a very apt time after the night I’ve just had due to hubby snoring...

I’m very sensitive to noise and have worn made to measure ear plugs for a long time. During the last year they’ve made one of my ears quite unhappy... so I stopped wearing them. In the last few months I’ve been taking myself off to the spare room in the middle of pretty much every night but, as you say, this is not ideal (although I do get SUCH a good night’s sleep...).
I’ve just started trying Cruchan mouldable ear plugs. They seal well initially but don’t stay that way for long and my inner ear is not happy again.
I was just thinking that it was about time my husband tried something so will give the nose strips a go - thanks Tigger.
Best of luck.
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NoodleFan
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Re: sleeping with a snoring wife

Postby NoodleFan » Mon Apr 19, 2021 8:31 am

DrStrangeLove - where did you get your custom made ones? I had some silicon ones for years which were great, then the latest batch were rock hard and made my ears sore (so I went back to the comfy old ones which made my inner ear horrible!).

We’ve had a noise machine for years - they are great. Need a louder one now though!
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SLALLU
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Re: sleeping with a snoring wife

Postby SLALLU » Mon Apr 19, 2021 11:36 am

 Snoring is often a reduction in the space at the back of the mouth ( rather than the nose as is commonly thought of). Weight gain can play a part, in addition, over time the tissues like the soft palate get lax and collapse into the airway - they then vibrate as the air is forced though. Chances are your wife is also not getting a good quality sleep.  There is a device that some trained dentists can make called a mandibular advancement device - it postures the lower jaw forward and opens up the airway for the uninterrupted breathing. 
We do this at Prodenta - have a look at we can email some further information 

http://www.prodenta.co.uk/snoring-devices/
 
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ineedmysleep
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Re: sleeping with a snoring wife

Postby ineedmysleep » Mon Apr 19, 2021 3:55 pm

Thanks you so for the detailed replies, much appreciated. I will look into the noise machine for sure and the bespoke earplugs. Dr Strangelove - love the name btw good tip re separate mattresses, may well go down this route but this time its my bad, I am a very restless sleeper.
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drstrangelove
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Re: sleeping with a snoring wife

Postby drstrangelove » Thu Apr 22, 2021 9:35 am

NoodleFan wrote:
Mon Apr 19, 2021 8:26 am
This post has come at a very apt time after the night I’ve just had due to hubby snoring...

I’m very sensitive to noise and have worn made to measure ear plugs for a long time. During the last year they’ve made one of my ears quite unhappy... so I stopped wearing them. In the last few months I’ve been taking myself off to the spare room in the middle of pretty much every night but, as you say, this is not ideal (although I do get SUCH a good night’s sleep...).
I’ve just started trying Cruchan mouldable ear plugs. They seal well initially but don’t stay that way for long and my inner ear is not happy again.
I was just thinking that it was about time my husband tried something so will give the nose strips a go - thanks Tigger.
Best of luck.
Hi Noodlefan (great name!) - yes custom silicone earplugs can become very painful with regular use. There are several things you need to do to this, which I discovered after many subsequent conversations with the audiologists who make them. I recommend you do the following:

1. Before fitting the earplugs make sure you apply a paper thin coat of Otoferm Creme. This is a product specifically made for moulded earplugs and essentially provides a barrier against the skin inside your ear, which is some of the most sensitive in the whole body. It makes it much easier to fit them, they stay in place and don't become sore as often. I use it daily before sleeping - and also be sure to wash your earplugs every 2-3 days and air dry, before applying the cream. You can often find them on Amazon but also several independent online shops. Search for Otoferm Creme in Google, retailers like 

Boots Hearing Care
Holt Hearing and Balance
Connevans

I tend to buy about 10 packets at once as I find I go through one every 6 months, that way I always have some around in case they get lost - easily done as the tube is tiny!

2. Regularly use Eargene, which is a sort of lubricant for the ear canal/opening - I tend to apply this using a Q-tip every few days. Together with Otoferm above, in combination they really do work to minise itchyness and discomfort.

Puretone Net
Boots Hearing Care
Amazon

3. For everyone asking about which audiologist I have worked with - it is Nick Clive - Director &  Audiologist at London Hearing. Their address is 150 Harley Street, London  W1G 7LQ:

 n.clive AT 150harleyst DOT com (NappyValley keeps rejecting the email address when I type it in normally)

You can either visit his practice in person - or they have partners they work with around the country who you can visit more locally, whom will book you in so they can take a foam impression of your ear canal which is used to make custom moulded ear plugs.

I've worked with them for nearly a decade, probably have had 3x sets of earplugs - as they degrade after about 2 years and also believe it or not, ear canals have slight shape changes over the years so you may need to repeat having the moulds done, especially if you are finding the earplugs don't fit as well.

One final point for anyone considering getting these - the type of silicone used for the earplugs is key. I went through a few different types before I found the ones that suited me best - they are the very soft versions and it is called a 'low shore silicone' - if you think you're quite sensitive, be sure to ask Nick for this type and also that they pay attention to the pressure points when making them.

Good luck & wishing every good nights' sleeps. ;)
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drstrangelove
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Re: sleeping with a snoring wife

Postby drstrangelove » Thu Apr 22, 2021 9:36 am

Posting again here as was getting technical error replying. Indeed custom silicone earplugs can become very painful with regular use. There are several things you need to do to this, which I discovered after many subsequent conversations with the audiologists who make them. Highly recommend you do the following:

1. Before fitting the earplugs make sure you apply a paper thin coat of Otoferm Creme. This is a product specifically made for moulded earplugs and essentially provides a barrier against the skin inside your ear, which is some of the most sensitive in the whole body. It makes it much easier to fit them, they stay in place and don't become sore as often. I use it daily before sleeping - and also be sure to wash your earplugs every 2-3 days and air dry, before applying the cream. You can often find them on Amazon but also several independent online shops. Search for Otoferm Creme in Google, retailers like 

Boots Hearing Care
Holt Hearing and Balance
Connevans

I tend to buy about 10 packets at once as I find I go through one every 6 months, that way I always have some around in case they get lost - easily done as the tube is tiny!

2. Regularly use Eargene, which is a sort of lubricant for the ear canal/opening - I tend to apply this using a Q-tip every few days. Together with Otoferm above, in combination they really do work to minise itchyness and discomfort.

Puretone Net
Boots Hearing Care
Amazon

3. For everyone asking about which audiologist I have worked with - it is Nick Clive - Director &  Audiologist at London Hearing. Their address is 150 Harley Street, London  W1G 7LQ:

 n.clive AT 150harleyst DOT com (NappyValley keeps rejecting the email address when I type it in normally)

You can either visit his practice in person - or they have partners they work with around the country who you can visit more locally, whom will book you in so they can take a foam impression of your ear canal which is used to make custom moulded ear plugs.

I've worked with them for nearly a decade, probably have had 3x sets of earplugs - as they degrade after about 2 years and also believe it or not, ear canals have slight shape changes over the years so you may need to repeat having the moulds done, especially if you are finding the earplugs don't fit as well.

One final point for anyone considering getting these - the type of silicone used for the earplugs is key. I went through a few different types before I found the ones that suited me best - they are the very soft versions and it is called a 'low shore silicone' - if you think you're quite sensitive, be sure to ask Nick for this type and also that they pay attention to the pressure points when making them.

Good luck & wishing every good nights' sleeps. Image
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SleepSoft
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Re: sleeping with a snoring wife

Postby SleepSoft » Mon Apr 26, 2021 8:53 am

Hi all, Have you tried the Alpine SleepSoft earplugs? They work well for me. I dont wear them everynight, but at least 3 nights a week. They stay in place the whole night, and dont disturb sleeping on our side. Never had any skin, discomfort issue.
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atbattersea
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Re: sleeping with a snoring wife

Postby atbattersea » Mon Apr 26, 2021 1:37 pm

I find good swift kick usually does the trick! A change of sleeping position works wonders.

Other than that, 50 pairs of foam earplugs are £7.99 at ScrewFix (made in the USA, no less, in a resealable pack). I find these soft foam earplugs very comfortable.
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szerma
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Re: sleeping with a snoring wife

Postby szerma » Mon Apr 26, 2021 6:21 pm

I can completely relate with a loudly snoring and flipping around at night husband. For him, he has always snored loudly, and he is not fat. Our 4 year old boy snores at times very loudly too, so I have the feeling it’s generic! I sent him to a doctor, he did nasal strips, rinses etc... and still he often snores so loudly I can’t  sleep.

I will echo silicone ear plugs - Specsavers on St John’s Road do them, custom made, they are around £100. I recommend getting them in any colour other than clear, as clear are really hard to find if you drop
them on the floor.

On the mattress, we did one step further, and replaced our king size bed with two singles (we did euro singles which are 180 cms long, which is the same length as a king size bed). I was reluctant to do it as we had just bought a new bed and mattress a year earlier, but in the end decided it was cheaper than a divorce (sent old bed and mattress on eBay, for arou d half what we paid for it). You can get a “space saver” bed, meaning you can push them right next to each other and they look like a big bed (two euro singles are same size as super king). Also went for two single duvets... I got our beds from “get laid beds”. If hubby snores really loud, when even the ear plugs don’t help, I push my bed all the way against the wall, which means I can’t hear him.

I do think that sleeping in the guest bedroom once in a while is a good thing, I do it about once a week (our kids wake up early so it’s a way for us to take turns having a lie in sometimes). I think it’s healthy to have a break from each other, especially as we are all in the house all the time!
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