Lunch suggestion hijacked by friend Post Reply

[Xmaspudding]

I am a long time user of this site but using a different user name as I don't wish to cause offence despite feeling upset by what has happened this week.

I emailed a few school mum friends to see if anyone fancied a casual lunch before we all break up. 

One of the newer mums to the group replied enthusiastically yes and then emailed around herself to say that she had booked Trinity for 8 and would change booking accordingly once numbers finalised.

That she hijacked my lunch email is one thing (I know that sounds petty), that she has quadrupled the price is another. I don't want to spend that sort of money on a mums lunch right before Xmas, to be honest I can't really afford it and know others will be in the same boat.

Not sure what to do for the best. Don't want to embarrass her but feel she has overstepped. Grateful for any ideas.

 

[mymyherewegoagain]

Maybe 'newer mum' is just trying to be helpful and desperately trying to fit it in and make friends without intending to cause offense.  

[ejacks71]

How annoying?!!

Just reply and tell her that you and the mum's were wanting a more casual lunch - Trinity is very formal, and pricey and not appropriate for just before xmas..

Just very politely tell her that you were organising it, and that it was only ever meant to be a relatively informal event, and that perhaps she could organise a more formal get together next time..

If you all want to meet and let your hair down, Trinity is not exactly the place.. How about a nice gastro pub? 

Good luck, but stand your ground.. I would call her and talk to her, as I don't think her behaviour is appropriate... You can be polite ;o)





 

[Moonlightdawn]

Perhaps she meant well but doesn’t realise that not everyone wants to spend a fortune. I understand your reaction though.

I would gently call her and say thank you for taking the initiative. However, a few people are on a budget especially in the lead up to Christmas. Let her know which [cheaper] restaurant you had in mine.

Am sure it will get sorted. Hope it’s a nice lunch. Great idea to think of organising something like this x

[Xmaspudding]

Thank you all for your replies.
I think that I will call her as suggested. I am sure that she meant well. I was just taken aback at the elevation of it all to a point that was going to exclude me 

[coldatchristmas]

I have to say I find this whole not being able to do anything on a more modest level a bit depressing. I know that there a lot of people around here with oodles of money but there are as many, possibly more ordinary folk who would prefer a night in a pub or a cheap and cheerful Italian v a michelin star restaurant. 



 

[Kirstie’s Mom]

I really don’t think referring to her as a Queen Bee is fair maybe because I used to get in these situations too. As a relative modest drinker I hated these events because we’d go to a crap restaurant and then most the Moms would get totally pissed. I found myself landed with a bill that was close to Chez Bruce In price but at Burger King quality - I actually resented subsidising their drinking . Maybe times have changed but in any case just explain Trinity is a bit pricey and suggest a few other restaurants. Good thing now is there are quite a lot of decent middle of the road restaurants around when there wasn’t in my school mom days .

[TFP]

I would either grin & bear it or cry off at preferably not-too short notice. Not nearly a big enough deal to justify even a whiff of drama. Different people like different things/have different expectations & ideas, that's OK.