Postby Anon45 » Mon Dec 07, 2020 9:32 am
Like others I really felt for you reading this. Being in an unhappy marriage is hard enough at the best of times, but must be lonelier than ever right now. I agree with everything others have said. Here in “Nappy Valley” nothing is ever as it seems. Divorce is rare particularly in primarily school aged kids, probably for the very reasons you are experiencing. Nobody wants to break up their family and raise their children as a single parent, and the financial implications are overwhelming. A lot of people have found counselling life changing, myself included, while others find more destructive ways of coping with the loneliness and anxiety.
The Awareness Centre have some excellent counsellors.
But I’d also speak privately to a divorce lawyer so you know what the likely outcome would be financially. You may be surprised. If you have young children he has to support them, and my understanding from word of mouth is that fault is now taken into account by the Courts.
In my case my husband and I had stopped communicating, so counselling was able to help us. It can’t fundamentally change who we are, so we still struggle with those issues but understand them better. I’m afraid when it comes to serial infidelity he probably can’t change that either. And you deserve so much better than this, and to be happy. Not just for your own sake, but so your children grow up in an environment with healthy respectful relationships. You can still be a loving family who co-parent, and you can live the rest of your life much happier than you are now. I hope this helps and that you have friends you can talk to, as none of us know you or him. Take care.