Unvaccinated godson (teen) to Xmas lunch should I hide it?

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queenofhearts
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Unvaccinated godson (teen) to Xmas lunch should I hide it?

Postby queenofhearts » Fri Dec 17, 2021 4:56 pm

I invited my godson who can't go home to stay for a few days over Christmas. What I didn't realise was that he isn't vaccinated. 

I know that my elderly 80 year old mother will be very unhappy about this if she finds out and now I am unsure whether to keep quiet about it and hope everything is OK or un-invite him which I think might mean him spending Christmas alone. 

Asking the impossible I think but is anyone dealing with anything similar and what are you likely to do?
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chorister
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Re: Unvaccinated godson (teen) to Xmas lunch should I hide it?

Postby chorister » Fri Dec 17, 2021 5:30 pm

Whatever else you do you definitely should not, in my humble opinion, keep quiet.  Your mother is entitled to know and to make her views known in response, and to make her own decisions.  And anyway - how will you feel if it is not OK and she is in intensive care by the middle of January?

Beyond that it depends how old your godson is and why he is not vaccinated.  If he is an adult and has taken his own decision then it is sad if he spends Christmas on his own, but most adults understand that most decisions involve consequences.
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ronangel
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Re: Unvaccinated godson (teen) to Xmas lunch should I hide it?

Postby ronangel » Mon Dec 20, 2021 5:36 am

Get him to take a PCR test (pack free from any chemist) no longer than 48 hours from party 24 or same day before he goes better. Negitive means does not have to say anything,positive stay away whatever reason cannot make.If you have been in contact with him and he is positive take test yourself before going.
---------------------------------------------
while I am here:QuickConspiracy theory for you all which makes a lot of sense conspiracy wise but we still don’t know why!
https://genocide.news/

 
Last edited by ronangel on Mon Dec 20, 2021 5:12 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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battersealadies
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Re: Unvaccinated godson (teen) to Xmas lunch should I hide it?

Postby battersealadies » Mon Dec 20, 2021 7:03 am

Oh dear - her question had nothing to do with requesting a conspiracy theory from the above poster.

I totally agree with the first post - you should tell your mother - who has a right to do what she wants - and she is your priority. I don’t allow unvaccinated people into my home anymore regardless of reason - it’s my home and my choice too.
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Feeling old
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Re: Unvaccinated godson (teen) to Xmas lunch should I hide it?

Postby Feeling old » Mon Dec 20, 2021 7:25 am

Hi there,
I think that whoever is in the house with your mother this Christmas should lateral flow every day. My husband and I have both been jabbed and had our boosters (about 6 weeks ago) but tested positive last week. Our kids are so far negative (one was double vaccinated 6 months ago and one has had the single about a month ago). So I don’t think your vaccination status effects if you get it or not. We were meant to be going to see parents for Christmas and are now not but we were going to do nothing for five or six days before we went as that’s how long it seems to take between being infected and showing up on a lateral flow.
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Torcat
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Re: Unvaccinated godson (teen) to Xmas lunch should I hide it?

Postby Torcat » Mon Dec 20, 2021 8:51 am

So I think it's your mum's vaccination status that matters most here, as even if your godson were vaccinated, he could still pass it to her. Presuming she is vaccinated, then I would ask her what she wants to do. The suggestion of having a PCR test beforehand is a good one, and then daily lateral flows (for all of you). My 80 year old mother in law is spending Christmas with us, I have a 9 year old who is obviously not vaccinated. We are all taking lateral flow tests and any of his friends who come to the house are doing so too. My husband is exposed daily via work, so he is taking tests. It is not perfect, but it's the best we can all do. Of course there is an element of risk to my MIL, but she accepts it, she also smokes a little so is happy for that risk, and it's just getting on with life. We also have a family that we have invited over to New Year's Day, young children and unvaccinated adults. I see them all the time and do socialise with them. If we are allowed, we will all be together, having had lateral flow tests. I guess some people would think that is mad, but we've all been vaccinated and boosted, and need to get on with life. Just check with your mother first.
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muddyboots
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Re: Unvaccinated godson (teen) to Xmas lunch should I hide it?

Postby muddyboots » Mon Dec 20, 2021 9:15 am

The notion that vaccinated equals completely safe is false, especially with the contagious new strain.
All the vaccine means unless boosted means you will have some protection and not fall very ill and need to be hospitalised if infected. You can still get infected and pass it on.

Tests are your best bet.

Finally, don’t be dishonest, that could be disastrous if something does go wrong.
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dudette
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Re: Unvaccinated godson (teen) to Xmas lunch should I hide it?

Postby dudette » Mon Dec 20, 2021 10:09 am

You can’t do a PCR for free unless you have a good reason. Wanting to know if you’re positive because you haven’t been jabbed isn’t a good reason. Either pay for one privately or make do with lateral flow tests.

As for the person above and the (frankly unintelligible) conspiracy theory - we’ll here’s my own conspiracy theory: someone has been planting fake conspiracy theories which have been going viral among certain communities in order to put people off having jabs and increase their risk of dying. By falling for these false conspiracy theories you are actually falling victim to the real conspiracy!

Anyway to answer the OP’s question - personally I would just uninvite him. Unless they have a good reason for it, the unvaccinated need to become social pariahs in the way smokers have become. They are occupying hospital beds and delaying treatment for cancer, heart and other patients who need urgent treatment. People are suffering dreadful pain from not being able to have their hip replacements. Anti-vaxxers are both idiotic and selfish. Maybe spending Christmas on his own will bring him to his senses!
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Starr
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Re: Unvaccinated godson (teen) to Xmas lunch should I hide it?

Postby Starr » Mon Dec 20, 2021 10:11 am

I would put your elderly mother's needs first in this pandemic.
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Jono1
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Re: Unvaccinated godson (teen) to Xmas lunch should I hide it?

Postby Jono1 » Mon Dec 20, 2021 12:25 pm

I think you should definitely let your elderly mother know, but that should not necessarily mean uninviting your godson if you are able to make her aware of the extra things you can do to significantly reduce the risk early enough.

If your godson is willing to play his part and do a PCR test on 23rd and isolate or at least avoid crowds etc for a few days ahead of Christmas while doing lateral flow tests including xmas day, I really think this is actually safer than him just being vaccinated as vaccinated people are still infectious.

This does not mean she will be comfortable, so you may have a tough choice to make. It is more important she can have a good Christmas too.

I have been through this myself recently with a family member who unfortunately ended up on a ventilator early in the pandemic, but luckily pulled through after 2 weeks.  We also lost very close family early this year to Covid.

Quite understandably he is quite concerned about mixing with school age family members (3, 9) who are now attending due to someone testing positive in their planned Xmas day Group at their grandmother's.
Given his experience last time he was just not happy to mix so we have unfortunately had to split our already very small group into 2 :( I completely understand why as his life is on the line and what kind of Christmas is that for him worrying all day.

I think a lot of people forget the key point that vaccinated people can still get infected and can still be infectious. This key point actually drives a a lot of careless behaviour by vaccinated people.

I personally think it is more important to keep cautious behaviour and keep testing.

Good luck.
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MRS
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Re: Unvaccinated godson (teen) to Xmas lunch should I hide it?

Postby MRS » Mon Dec 20, 2021 4:06 pm

Hi there

I think you have a really difficult decision on your hands and I don’t envy you.

It might be worth pointing your mother in the direction of the evidence however, which paints a slightly different picture than the one we receive via mainstream media.

The prime minister himself has admitted that being vaccinated doesn’t stop you getting or transmitting Covid. And this is backed up by numerous studies which show that the vaccinated transmit at a similar rate to the unvaccinated..

Also has your godson had Covid? He is very likely to have a very good immune system if he is young and natural immunity to Covid has been shown to be superior and longer lasting than vaccine immunity.

I know these facts are hard for people to digest because it’s not the message they are getting from the government or media.
What I’m trying to say is it’s just not true that those in your household who are vaccinated are less likely to transmit Covid if they have it at the time you all meet.

So it strikes me she should be as concerned about those who are vaccinated as unvaccinated! Perhaps if she is so worried it’s best for her to stay away. I know that’s hard and it shouldn’t be like this at all but it’s just important to remember that being vaccinated isn’t going to stop transmission unfortunately
If only this were the case!

It seems like you need a good chat with your elderly relative to make sure she understands the risks and then she can decide if she comes or not. As for your godson, he won’t put anyone at greater risk!

I know this might be unpopular and I wish it weren’t the case that vaccination doesn’t stop transmission but it is the truth!

Best of luck with your decision
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chorister
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Re: Unvaccinated godson (teen) to Xmas lunch should I hide it?

Postby chorister » Mon Dec 20, 2021 4:16 pm

I am sorry, but that is simply incorrect.  There is no data yet re Omicron, but for Delta people who are vaccinated are 63% less likely to infect those who are unvaccinated - see article in the 23 October 2021 issue of New Scientist citing University of Illinois, National Institute for Public Health and the Environment in the Netherlands and Yale University (using data from Israel) research among others, plus many other sources.
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ronangel
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Re: Unvaccinated godson (teen) to Xmas lunch should I hide it?

Postby ronangel » Mon Dec 20, 2021 5:11 pm

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