HELP - panicking about childcare, any advice appreciated (some rambling, sorry!)

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PlayDoh333
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HELP - panicking about childcare, any advice appreciated (some rambling, sorry!)

Postby PlayDoh333 » Sat Jul 17, 2021 8:19 pm

Hi there,

Thank you for reading! I have no one I can talk to about this, including my husband who just thinks things are going to fall into place magically, so any advice would be greatly appreciated!

As background, I was made redundant (boo Covid) whilst I was on mat leave so am lucky to spend 18 months and counting with my son. I have just been offered a new job and they want me to start on Aug 2nd! WTF?! I was very clear from the onset with the recruiter that I would need time to sort out childcare, about 2 months!! I stated this to my new boss so he suggested Aug 23rd. Still kinda WTF and now I am PANIC STATIONS. I have to find childcare and have a settling in period for my son within 5 weeks :'(

He goes to nursery for 2 half days at the moment and they're full so can't take him in for the remaining 3 days. I've asked if they can extend his half days to full days and I'm waiting to hear back. This is kinda holding me up from advertising for a nanny until I know the hours nursery can do. Should I just advertise anyway? His nursery is incredibly slow at replying if they do! Does anyone know if it's more attractive to a nanny to work for 5 days as opposed to 3 or 4 days?! How long is a piece of string?!?!

I'm contemplating a Norland nanny. To me, due to my ignorance and inexperience looking for childcare, being a Norland nanny is a qualification that proves he/she is capable. It's kinda like a pre-check for me given I'm going to be leaving my child with a complete stranger in my home! Does anyone have any comments on this!?

Does anyone have any advice?! How long does finding a nanny take?! Should I just tell work that Aug 23rd is unfeasible?! Childminding in my area won't work and I don't want to take my son out of the nursery he's already in to find another one - in part I'm trying to minimise his disruption and also there isn't an alternative located conveniently!!

I know I'm not really asking about anything specific but any thoughts would be appreciated :'(

x
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My little pony
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Re: HELP - panicking about childcare, any advice appreciated (some rambling, sorry!)

Postby My little pony » Sun Jul 18, 2021 10:33 pm

Congratulations on the new job! From your post it looks like you might be better off with a nanny anyway, as there is more flexibility with hours, and less stress generally (particularly at the moment where it seems like nursery bubbles are bursting all the time, leaving parents without childcare).

I had originally intended to go for nursery when I first returned to work after mat leave but after assessing the options went for a nanny. It was more expensive, but I never regretted it. I don’t think you need to go for a Norland nanny, I don’t know how easy they are to come by. If you are prepared to put in some work to advertise and interview thoroughly, you can advertise on sites like this one, gumtree, there may be others. But expect to be sifting through lots of CVs and be prepared for some depressing interviews. We did this though and eventually found a wonderful nanny who worked for us for years.

Two things strike me from your post:
- re your work, you can tell a lot about an employer from their attitude to something like this: if they’re being inflexible now, imagine what it’s going to be like working for them a few months in, when you have emergency childcare issues for example. If I were you, I’d explain your issue to them and propose a solution - eg if you only have childcare for 2 days a week, that you start on a part time basis for a couple of months which gives you the time to sort out the childcare. If you need to find a new nursery or a new nanny, it’s going to take more than a month.
- where is your husband in this? He can’t abdicate responsibility for his child’s care. I would be asking him whether he can take some leave in order to help with the transition. It is really not just your problem, he needs to pull his weight too. Don’t let him get away with thinking this is only your issue and he can leave it to you to sort out.

Good luck!
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PlayDoh333
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Re: HELP - panicking about childcare, any advice appreciated (some rambling, sorry!)

Postby PlayDoh333 » Sun Jul 18, 2021 11:08 pm

@mylittlepony; thanks for your reply!

I completely agree with you about your point of the employer. I thought the same thing. And he has 2 young kids!! How did he think I could magic up childcare in 2 weeks?!?? I was quite angry over the weekend 😅 and will definitely be having a chat with him next week.

Re; the husband, to be fair, he is hands on but he’s very optimistic that things will just fall into place whereas I panic at things out of my control. I can’t control the quality of candidates, when their availability is, if they even want to work for us, etc etc!

Appreciate all your advice! May I ask how long did it take you to find your nanny from start of the search to him/her starting?

Many thanks!! xxx
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Andbreathe
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Re: HELP - panicking about childcare, any advice appreciated (some rambling, sorry!)

Postby Andbreathe » Sun Jul 18, 2021 11:34 pm

Firstly yes - you should be able to find a good nanny by late August. It’s worth putting up a job advert here, and asking for recommendations on your local mum’s Facebook group plus there are specialist agencies - I actually found a brilliant nanny through the bubble babysitting app when I need 2 months help during the last lockdown due to the school closures.

I’d recommend putting a detailed job description together, to include information about your family and style of parenting. Tell them about the activities you would like them to do with your child (music classes, library trips, the park, playgroups). Be clear about your house work expectations - ie meal prep, your child’s laundry, tidying up - for example our nanny used to batch cook toddler meals during our toddler’s afternoon nap which was great.
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Summersept2020
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Re: HELP - panicking about childcare, any advice appreciated (some rambling, sorry!)

Postby Summersept2020 » Mon Jul 19, 2021 3:23 pm

Nannyjob.co.uk is also a good place to try advertising
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PlayDoh333
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Re: HELP - panicking about childcare, any advice appreciated (some rambling, sorry!)

Postby PlayDoh333 » Wed Jul 21, 2021 9:27 pm

Thank you @andbreathe and @summersept2020!! x
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2009Kat
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Re: HELP - panicking about childcare, any advice appreciated (some rambling, sorry!)

Postby 2009Kat » Wed Jul 21, 2021 10:26 pm

We've used nanny agencies in the past and often you can find a nanny the next week or the next day! It just depends on finding someone you like and who likes you so it may take a bit longer than that.  We've always used local nanny agencies eg Abbeville Nannies but as pp said sites such as this one and facebook also work really well.  It may cost to hire through an agency more than if you post on a site but a bit less sifting of CVs and also if the nanny doesn't work out they can help find a replacement.  All helpful when you're working and your husband sounds a bit like mine........!  
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Mel J
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Re: HELP - panicking about childcare, any advice appreciated (some rambling, sorry!)

Postby Mel J » Tue Jul 27, 2021 10:25 am

Hi there, I am sure you will find somebody great try not to panic due to feeling you are running out of time. You need to contact Norlands pretty quickly for a probationary student but they live in.. Also Chiltern trained people are very good ( its the other private residential college) I was there years ago and the training was excellent. Now my 3 children are older
I run a baby creche in Southfields which I love doing. We have been part of the community for 8 years now and offer half days, full days and even a few hours to suit your needs clubcreche in Southfields. Happy to help while you take time to find the right person.
All good wishes Mel
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