Postby Gullsands » Mon Dec 12, 2016 2:52 pm
I completely 'get' Petal's point of view and have plenty of friends who wouldn't dream of sending their children to board, either at senior school or especially at prep school, and I respect their position. However, I think it is a real case of 'horses for courses' - if parents are in the fortunate position of being able to choose from the huge array of private schools, boarding and day, and if they have a child or children who would really benefit from boarding, it can be a great option.
I don't get the impression that you feel you have to consider boarding just because you are living in England, Monaco - if boarding would really suit your daughter, you're very wise to consider that option amongst the others, as the decision to send your child to an English boarding school is very different from the French version, as you say.
So, as background to answer your questions from my own limited experience, Monaco, I have one child at full boarding school and one at a London day school - they are close in age but very different children indeed. They both went to day school until 13, so we had them both at home for those very important childhood years but, once they are in their teens, their needs and family dynamic can change. Our older one always wanted to board and absolutely LOVES it, whilst his brother really didn't want to board so he's very happy too at day school.
You asked about how friendships work for boarders, and I would say, completely honestly, that my boarding child has a far better social life than his day pupil sibling - it's partly down to his very sociable nature (his brother is much less gregarious and likes his own company), but he has made wonderful friends at boarding school and sees a lot of them on exeat (ie home) weekends and in the holidays. I agree completely with sleep5candle's comments on the difference between weekly and full boarding - the 'full' option gives them all the benefits, including social, of a boarding school and, personally, I would always advocate full boarding even though it takes a lot of getting used to - but you may need to be prepared for the possibility that your daughter will want to stay in school most weekends because they have such a great time! My son doesn't see that many friends from his London prep school these days, but is certainly fully immersed in his friendships at school. Many of his school friends now live outside London - fairly typical of boarding school profiles, I guess - but remember that, after the age of 13 when they go to boarding senior school, they are happy travelling by train to visit each other and this is great for independence. We love having his non-London friends to stay as they are all, without exception so far, charming and great company and, as an unexpected bonus, we have made some good friends amongst their parents too.
He is at a co-ed school which has both boarding and day pupils, with a fair number from many other countries including France, so a really interesting, cosmopolitan mix and lots of wonderful qualities over and above the amazing facilities which are to be found in most of these private schools - if you would like to discuss the school with me, Monaco, just PM me and I'll be happy to do so. Be prepared for a biassed opinion, though, as we love his school almost as much as he does!
