Is my boss asking too much ? Post Reply

[Sunnies]

Hi,

I am an au pair plus working monday to friday morning.
Monday and wednesday from 8am to 6:30pm, I have a 2 years old boy with me all day; tuesday and thursday, he is at nursery and I have to do around 3 hours of cleaning each day then on friday, I just have to tidy up for an hour or so. I am paid 150 pounds a week, I live in their house and the dad (who is working from home) is asking me to clean this and this ... Basically, I am doing all the cleaning at home. I have to wash their clothes, putting back in the wardrobe, vaccumming every rooms, dusting and this morning, he even asked me to polish a wood table ...

I don't know if it's ok or is he pushing ? I mean, I am lucky because the salary is generous but I should rub the toilet as well but that I refused to do it ..
Just tell me your thoughts, I do my best, I clean but I feel like I am being used sometimes. Specially when he tells me to do something that he never did in his life and pretends that he does it all the time ...

[emsken]

that is a LOT of work for not very much money - in fact way below the legal limit i am sure....

That said i havent got an au pair so am not sure.

On another note, a friend of mine is looking for a new one as hers is moving home, so if you are wanting to move let me know!

[supergirl]

Gosh! They got a fab deal!!! Childcare and a cleaner for that little money!

If i were you i d renegotiate or leave.

Good luck

[Sunnies]

Thank you for replying. At the first place, it seemed to be such a good thing, the money is alright and I have got my own floor which is nice. But I feel like the dad is watching what I do and he starts to annoy me now so yes I think I will leave.

[susiep23]

hi there. i am now sure the usuaul role for au pairs but YES DEFINATELY in my opionion u are being asked too much for very little.


Did u have any contract or written agreement for what you're job role would entail?? Most nannies do but im not sure for au pairs but to cover you're self i would enquire this for sure. If u do decide to move on i would say this is a must for you next time or atleast some kind of written/verbal agreement then you are not taken advantage of again as you're current employer seems to have been taking you for a ride.

Definately have a chat with them and say whilst you were prepared to muck in/help out in the house explain you're workload seems to be ever increasing and you would like to know what is expected of you from then on day to day.. NOT as and when they feel it ok for you to play housekeeper, cleaner, child carer and bearer of whatever they feel like putting upon you because they think "arhh she wont mind". Stick up for you!! ...or give you're notice if you've had enough but try leave on good terms for you're reference to next family

[Minnie]

I don't think the deal is too bad. Most room rentals in this area are around £700pm and this is sharing in a busy house.

You only need to work 2 full days and then 2 days of 3 hours and you receive around £1,4000pm (inc accomadation) also leaving you with time to get any extra work if you needed. Lots of nannys are struggling to get full time work and have rental/bills to pay for. Me personally I would be happy with this opportunity.

[AbbevilleMummy]

You are being exploited. Your employers know that and deep down you know that.

The Home Office Guidelines set by the UK Government states that an au pair works 25 hours per week for 5 days per week. An au pair must have 2 days free per week.

I would start looking for another position if I were you, but maybe expect to get paid closer to £100 per week.

[susiep23]

i think she earns just £150 a week, thats only £650 a month worked out the usual way of £150*52weeks/12 months

[Sunnies]

Thank you Minnie for your point of view. I have to say that it is a great deal but I am not a nanny just an au pair which is not the same. I would have been happy for months, years with them if the dad wasn't expected that his house should shine whilst he can't put his own cup in the dishwasher ...

I do have a written agreement with them which explain the hours of childcare and hours of cleaning but it's general. I have always been happy to help around, tidying up. As an au pair, I have to do chores related to the kids of course but he asked me to clean his personal stuff, I had to clean a back room to make more space and on my first week, he asked me to organise the kitchen storage ...

I am aware of I am being used and that for them, it's a great deal to get everything done by one person and for less money. I am already looking for another position and I would prefer to get less money rather than someone explaining me his high standard of cleaning whilst he can't put his own clothes in his own wardrobe.

[susiep23]

ha ha ha the world we live in lol, thats not in repsonse to you're situation just some of the comments are funny regards demands on you but not putting own cup in the dishwasher, clothes etc.

I hope u find a good position for you good luck

[Sunnies]

Thank you, I hope so too.
I know the comments sound funny but it's true though ! He will put his cup on top of the dishwasher and will wait that I put it in !

[AbbevilleMummy]

I have just thought, have you tried speaking to the mum?

It's just that I know my husband sometimes pushes the boundaries with regards to my housekeeper and also my nanny. I think men are different to women in that they always to try get as much as they can (where everything's concerned)!

In my experience, when I have found out that my husband has asked my housekeeper, babysitter or nanny for a favour that is outside what has been agreed, I have been furious as it is so important to me that these people are happy to work for us as without them I would be lost and these favours can make them feel much the same way that you feel. Losing them would not impact my husband greatly, but for me it would be awful as I trust them and need them.

You may find that the mum has no idea that her husband is making these requests so I would suggest having a quiet word first if you can.

[Sunnies]

The mom has been away and maybe that's why he tried to ask me more. I didn't get a chance to talk to her yet but of course I will because she is a great person, we got on very well and also, the child loves me a lot so that would be a shame for me to leave really. I will give it a try !

Thank you all for your replies, I really appreciate

[BalhamMumWorkingFT]

We have an Au Pair which gets paid less but my kids are in school almost full time. Anyway, it is a hard subject to broach as an average wage for an Au Pair Plus (30-35 hours a week with 2 full days off) is about £100. Usually this equates to child care for school aged children and light cleaning which includes chores mainly revolving around kids (laundry, dishes, etc..).

With that said, if you think it is all getting to be too much, you must talk to your host family no matter what anyone else thinks. I really want my live in to be happy! And to be getting out of their experience what they want. Au Pairs are NOT NANNIES. As a host family you are responsible for being a host family not an employer.

Good Luck.

[MGMidget]

What the total hours you are working? Au pair plus is up to 35 hours a week and pocket money varies but £150 is definitely above average. Remember you are getting a whole floor of accommodation to yourself which is worth a fortune around here and presumably you are getting all your meals provided so full-board accommodation. However, it does sound like the father is trying it on a bit when the mother is away, expecting you to deal with lots of extras. I would have a constructive discussion with the mum when she is back about setting out the expectations and hours of work so that you know when you have time off. As far as doing all the cleaning is concerned, the norm is usually some 'light housework' but as you are being paid above the average, as long as you knew what your duties were when you accepted the job and your working hours are 35 or less, then it probably isn't unreasonable. If you hate the cleaning but otherwise like the job you could try suggesting a reduction in pocket money down to £100 or £110 if they get a cleaner to come in for a few hours a week. If you are still not happy with the situation after discussing with the mum then you can probably find something else locally but you may find you will be paid £100 or less.