I agree with the last post. Find the right person for you and your children. We got very lucky and have someone terrific. Not perfect, but no one is (including us), but she is great with our child and I very much enjoy her company as well. I doubt that a nanny can be great if they are simply very good with the children. She (or he) needs to become (and the parents need to let her/him become) a part of the family, in a way. It takes time, but it's worth it for everyone involved.

This is a facinating thread and agree that the negative experiences seem specific.

I'm a working mum of three....

There are mornings when the house is chaotic and then our lovely nanny arrives! They love her and she loves them. We love her because she loves them. Of course there are mornings when I leave her with them and I feel a bit sad that I won't get to go to the park or the playgroup or do whatever fun activity they have planned for the day. That is the lot of most working mums and I doubt any fair minded nanny would be jealous of that particular dilemma! She works hard, cooking for them and doing their laundry as well as generally taking care of them and teaching them amazing things. We all do our bit. Of course we overcompensate sometimes, but we try to get the balance right. It's a known fact that children behave better for their nannies. It's not about nationalities, careers, spas, big salaries, etc. It's about chemistry. If it's not working, make it stop and find someone else to share your life with!

I am a nanny...

I think stating 'avoid british families' is racist and very sad on ur behalf, how can anyone judge by a experience..

Dont get me wrong, iv seen bad parenting and good parenting, iv seen alot of love and alot of 'havent got time or patience love'

Everyone is different.. Children are the most precious things in the world, everyone should respect and love them..

As a nanny, i personally think its the best job in the world!!!!

I love the 3 kiddies i look after with all my heart...

The Guardian article sounds like an individual experience. Also Flowergarden, you have taken your own individual experience and tried to generalise it! It is always good to be able to see another's point of view and I sympathise with your bad experience, but generalisations of people to avoid or choose are somewhat insulting to those concerned and perhaps even racist since you're mentioning nationalities. I could site faults with past nannies but they would be specific to those nannies rather than a fault of nannies in general (I would hope!). I can't think of anyone who 'looks down' on their nanny and I don't know of any mum who's not delighted if their children love their nanny! Some families like that may exist but they are probably a small minority.

Lol...so funny.well its a two way situation,really,every nanny,every family have different expirience,is part of the process getting to know eachother,ets.funny article!!!

I'm a nanny.
I can understand the food comments- I have known plenty of families who claim they are into healthy eatting etc,yet think nothing of plying children with sweet things when they come home from work. To the point the kids learn that they can skip tea as mummy/daddy will give them stuff later.Luckily my current family arent like it but I have experienced it.

As for the rest,I dont agree with.How hypercritical is she? She doesnt seem to agree with working parents and childcare,yet shes a nanny.
Cleaners are paid a gross wage.Nannies are not supposed to be self employed so our wages are net.Plus cleaners tend to do short hours so normal to be paid more per hour.Comparing 2 different jobs is hardly fair. Plus,I have alot of respect for cleaners-I couldnt do their jobs for all the tea in china as I hate cleaning.

Just to put the article into perspective - this is a column that is in the Saturday magazine every week. It's not an article by a journalist but anyone can write in and say what they're really thinking - things that they wouldn't normally say out loud. The other week it was the turn of a working mum. So this is very much one person's way of getting a few things off her chest. Maybe someone could write in from the other side?

I am a nanny myself and have worked with many families over the years and luckily most of them were amazing. That does not mean that they paid me in time (I have to check every single week if my salary arrived to my account) or didn't think I live to look after their kids and be there whenever they want me to. For me work comes first but I learnt to say no, I had to. I do enjoy this job, I couldn't work in a stressful corporate environment just for the money - not because I am not capable but it's not worth it for me.
I noticed that many parents just don't have the patience for their kids. Then they feel guilty for not spending enough time with them and spoil them - ruining the boundaries set by us and making our work that much harder. Indeed it is so much easier with kids when the parents are out.
Your children's behavior is a consequence of yours. Are they good? Well done! Are they naughty and spoiled? I'm sorry to say but it is very likely your fault.

Flowergarden, this is a hell of an experience you describe... I hope you worked for a grateful family after this one.

Good luck.

I hope my nanny doesn't think this of me. they may not get chocolate biscuits, but there's usually a serious amount of nutella at 7am in our kitchen. alas, my husband was raised on it and thinks it is actual food.

Seriously, it sounds like the story is an individual one relating to an particular nanny and family and nothing more. It's not very helpful the way the newspaper presents it as something universal.

Hi!
I have worked as a Nanny for 4 years and I have been really lucky with 2 of my families, they were very kind, appreciative, reliable and just a pleasure to work for, but I have also seen a different kind of parent and I must say it took away a big chunk of my confidence and happiness. After reading the article my first response was this:

... Oh just to complete my anger on these type of families once and for all...she forgot to write about not getting paid on time, the correct amount or at all. And if you do get paid you have to wait up to 30min longer just because they 'forgot' to take out the money, it is then counted before your eyes with the comment :"That is correct isn't it?" After a 16h + day you then have to be polite and say: " We agreed on something slightly different." after which the minutes of the week are counted whilst the children scream for their mummy.
She forgot to mention that these type of 'privileged british' families are expecting you to do all the cleaning for the whole family as well as the childcare. She forgot to mention that you have to visit other 'strange' families with very loud and aggressive children for play-dates so that you have to look after 9 children not just three, whilst the mums sit and eat expensive food and talk about their cleaning ladies and behind their 'so called friend' backs.
She also forgot to mention that the creepy dads don't even get kisses from their children because they do not remember this man with a loud voice and a glass of wine in their hand.
She also forgot to mention the 100 times the mums go to the spa, massage therapists, shops and gyms in order to look great before coming to you for advice on their evening dresses and shoes only so that the husband can say to them : "This is what you are wearing?" before leaving their children for another 5h. And last but not least they forget how much time you spend with their children and how amazing their children are they forget how much the children love you and how much you love them, they don't care if the children are sad or crying when you finally get fired because the mums get upset when the children say: 'I love you ' to their Nanny...

...Now that I have given it 30min to sink in I am back to my usual smiley self and I still love working with children, but please do not underestimate what some Nannies have to go through, some have a hard time speaking English, they are often miles away from their families and loved ones, I have even met a Nanny who had to leave her own child in her country and work over here to pay for his food and education. I have met Nannies who could not look after their own children because they did not have enough money, instead they had to put their children into a daycare center and look after other peoples children.

My advice coming from my own experience is: try to work for an Australian, German or Swedish Familiy. They pay you on time, they make sure you get a paid holiday, they are paying the right amount of taxes and they are fun to be with.

Avoid! British families with a history in finance and banking, avoid families living in big houses where the decor is only beige, white and grey!

Thank you for your time...I hope this was helpful to anyone. x

Oh, and check out the film "The Nanny" it is VERY close to reality.

@ amybelle79
Either that OR you need to get off you high horse and try to put yourself in this woman's shoes and look at it from a different perspective, if you can!
Or are you in the "driving BMW and holidaying in the Maldives" club?
And maybe you feed your kids chocolate biscuits at 7AM too? And you also pay your nanny less than your cleaner? Provided you have either or both of those, that is. And I bet you don't spend more than 48 hours per week with your kids while they are awake...
This was me judging you without knowing you and your family or your circumstances at all. Doesn't feel good, does it!
So don't judge others!
You don't know her circumstances or what the people she works for are like. And maybe, just maybe, she is a nanny because she loves what she does and, she loves the kids she spends her days with. What difference does it make if she likes the parents or not. She doesn't live there.
@ Hatsmum
How do you know she's jealous? Are you a very powerful psychic who can read someone's feelings through a (copy-pasted) letter?

So she's jealous in three languages. Whoopydoo.

@ NJE
Don't judge, please!
How do you know that she is employed anyway? She could be self-employed too.
And who gave you the idea that a nanny should get paid less than a cleaner if both are live-out?
If the parents appreciate their nanny they should pay her a decent wage. Sadly, some rich people don't appreciate their nannies because they probably think something along the lines of "if she doesn't want the job there are plenty of others who would take it and not complain about pay, hours etc.".
You agree with feeding the kids chocolate biscuits at 7AM then.

Freshmum, i thought so !!!