by BalhamMumWorkingFT » Fri Jun 15, 2012 2:27 pm
Ah, Toddlers. I love them and loathe them all in the same minute... How can calm babies turn into crazy toddlers and then the most polite pre-schoolers. Well, it's life. But that doesn't help when you are tired and struggling to figure them out!
One thing toddlers really struggle with is learning to be independent. They need more security from parents than ever before but then they want to do everything themselves. This usually manifests in them expressing their "own ideas" about bedtime, clothing, playing, etc... My little girl didn't cave to even dressing (in ANYTHING) without a tantrum until just recently and she's nearly 4. Ugh.
I'd follow the previous posters advice and do a quick sanity check with what I call pain points: 1. Illness: fever? runny nose? 2. Teething: are they all in there? 3. Changing of routine or environment: new nursery, new sibling? --- These are all going to cause upset with normality and it's not fair to judge or get frantic about it if any one is present. Just do your best to stick with the routine and be as accommodating as possible within reason (for example, water in a bottle at night, dummies, etc...)
If all seems well, I'd look for some clues how he would like bedtime to go, such as, maybe he wants 3 stories or to chose his stories.. Little things you can get him to control without controlling bedtime are sometimes quick wins and make the whole process less stressful. Bedtime = calm and when things go crazy, no one is calm and bedtime goes pear shaped. BTW, good easy bedtime in my house happens about twice a week. Other than that, I just do my best. (2 kids, 15months apart, now wanting to sleep in the SAME bed... fun)
As you are, keep consistency in there. If he is really worried about you, I used to talk about what I am doing when my son goes to bed.... "I am going to say goodnight to you after this story, then do all that pesky laundry you made this week. I need you to go to sleep so we can have fun tomorrow. Close your eyes, dream good dreams, and I'll come give you more kisses in 5 minutes" Knowing what I am doing for some reason helped him understand that I wasn't leaving him. He was usually asleep after a couple checks... but it was more playing problems than screaming problems which is a hell of alot better for the stress levels.
Anyway, good luck. It is so not fun when your tired, they're tired, and everyone is out of sorts.
Ah, Toddlers. I love them and loathe them all in the same minute... How can calm babies turn into crazy toddlers and then the most polite pre-schoolers. Well, it's life. But that doesn't help when you are tired and struggling to figure them out!
One thing toddlers really struggle with is learning to be independent. They need more security from parents than ever before but then they want to do everything themselves. This usually manifests in them expressing their "own ideas" about bedtime, clothing, playing, etc... My little girl didn't cave to even dressing (in ANYTHING) without a tantrum until just recently and she's nearly 4. Ugh.
I'd follow the previous posters advice and do a quick sanity check with what I call pain points: 1. Illness: fever? runny nose? 2. Teething: are they all in there? 3. Changing of routine or environment: new nursery, new sibling? --- These are all going to cause upset with normality and it's not fair to judge or get frantic about it if any one is present. Just do your best to stick with the routine and be as accommodating as possible within reason (for example, water in a bottle at night, dummies, etc...)
If all seems well, I'd look for some clues how he would like bedtime to go, such as, maybe he wants 3 stories or to chose his stories.. Little things you can get him to control without controlling bedtime are sometimes quick wins and make the whole process less stressful. Bedtime = calm and when things go crazy, no one is calm and bedtime goes pear shaped. BTW, good easy bedtime in my house happens about twice a week. Other than that, I just do my best. (2 kids, 15months apart, now wanting to sleep in the SAME bed... fun)
As you are, keep consistency in there. If he is really worried about you, I used to talk about what I am doing when my son goes to bed.... "I am going to say goodnight to you after this story, then do all that pesky laundry you made this week. I need you to go to sleep so we can have fun tomorrow. Close your eyes, dream good dreams, and I'll come give you more kisses in 5 minutes" Knowing what I am doing for some reason helped him understand that I wasn't leaving him. He was usually asleep after a couple checks... but it was more playing problems than screaming problems which is a hell of alot better for the stress levels.
Anyway, good luck. It is so not fun when your tired, they're tired, and everyone is out of sorts.