by Scottov » Tue Apr 09, 2013 2:16 pm
mungomuffit wrote:Having read this thread with interest as it unfolded, I hadn't expected to be in a similar situation so soon! Blimey, it was terrible and I'm not sure I did the right thing (no doubt Scottov will tell me I didn't), just did what I thought was right at the time in a VERY challenging situation.
I arrived to meet my parents and 7 yo son at Chelsea Carluccios with a cold and grumpy 5 year old daughter (we got lost, it was snowing, probably walked nearly a mile to find it, so I understand that she was not in the best mood). My parents fuss over her: "where do you want to sit darling, here, there?" "Next to Nana" she says, but that's where her brother is sitting. No, sit here next to me, your brother is sitting there. Kew (sp?) whinging, carrying on. So brother moves into the spare seat next to me so she can have the seat next to Nana. She's still not happy. Now she decides she wants to sit next to me, where her brother has moved. I say no, your brother has moved to give you that seat and is not moving again, stop being a pain or we will go home. Meanwhile, my parents are fussing over her and giving me dark looks because I'm not backing down to my 5yo dictator. But, that's for another thread - grandparents who contradict parents openly in front of the children ...
Well, to cut a long story short, daughter was determined to be a little sh*t, disturbing people in the restaurant and ruining our lunch, so I gradually gathered our belongings, stuffed her into her coat, picked her up and carried her over my shoulder out the door. She then screamed her lungs out on Fulham Road and then for the next 5 minutes in the cab home, while I couldn't stop crying. [Cabbie was pretty happy because I gave him a large tip to make up for it!] She's really great most of the time, I hasten to add
I agree with Lulubear that the onus is on us if we take our children to a public place that they need learn to behave and with Ellesmum and Supergirl that it's never too young to set boundaries. Take the child home as a punishment for behaving badly. Then, when it's calmer, explain to them why they were taken home. Which is what I did and she seems to understand and has been lovely ever since!
phew, sorry for the long post!
could not agree more.
things such as common decency, manners, and consideration should not be negotiable.
taking responsibility for the situation, which you clearly have is all anyone can ever ask of you. what's more, its likely to have set a boundary that your daughter will understand if not approve of.
after all, what are the chances that she didn't know she was being a little bit naughty, seeing how far she could push mummy in front of the grandparents?
[quote="mungomuffit"]Having read this thread with interest as it unfolded, I hadn't expected to be in a similar situation so soon! Blimey, it was terrible and I'm not sure I did the right thing (no doubt Scottov will tell me I didn't), just did what I thought was right at the time in a VERY challenging situation.
I arrived to meet my parents and 7 yo son at Chelsea Carluccios with a cold and grumpy 5 year old daughter (we got lost, it was snowing, probably walked nearly a mile to find it, so I understand that she was not in the best mood). My parents fuss over her: "where do you want to sit darling, here, there?" "Next to Nana" she says, but that's where her brother is sitting. No, sit here next to me, your brother is sitting there. Kew (sp?) whinging, carrying on. So brother moves into the spare seat next to me so she can have the seat next to Nana. She's still not happy. Now she decides she wants to sit next to me, where her brother has moved. I say no, your brother has moved to give you that seat and is not moving again, stop being a pain or we will go home. Meanwhile, my parents are fussing over her and giving me dark looks because I'm not backing down to my 5yo dictator. But, that's for another thread - grandparents who contradict parents openly in front of the children ...
Well, to cut a long story short, daughter was determined to be a little sh*t, disturbing people in the restaurant and ruining our lunch, so I gradually gathered our belongings, stuffed her into her coat, picked her up and carried her over my shoulder out the door. She then screamed her lungs out on Fulham Road and then for the next 5 minutes in the cab home, while I couldn't stop crying. [Cabbie was pretty happy because I gave him a large tip to make up for it!] She's really great most of the time, I hasten to add :?
I agree with Lulubear that the onus is on us if we take our children to a public place that they need learn to behave and with Ellesmum and Supergirl that it's never too young to set boundaries. Take the child home as a punishment for behaving badly. Then, when it's calmer, explain to them why they were taken home. Which is what I did and she seems to understand and has been lovely ever since!
phew, sorry for the long post![/quote]
could not agree more.
things such as common decency, manners, and consideration should not be negotiable.
taking responsibility for the situation, which you clearly have is all anyone can ever ask of you. what's more, its likely to have set a boundary that your daughter will understand if not approve of.
after all, what are the chances that she didn't know she was being a little bit naughty, seeing how far she could push mummy in front of the grandparents?
