Breastfeeding help - first time mum in Wimbledon Post Reply

[Mumabean17]

Hi there,
Just wondering if anyone could recommend some help towards breastfeeding at all? We have just left hospital following a c section with a big healthy boy at 9lb 7. I am struggling to get him to latch on and suck (don't know if it's a mixture of not knowing how or lazy - as the midwife said). We have got him to feed on the breast twice in 3 days with the same midwife but it was a huge struggle & both baby & I were a little distressed. Now we are home I am unable to get him to latch no matter how hard I try. I don't seem to have a problem with producing (hand expressing and now pumping) but I got so stressed with it we have had to use formula to top up also. Hoping I can keep stimulating and crack the boob, just need a little help! Midwife coming round today but wondered if any of you had any other avenues I can look at too (I live in wimbledon)? Any advice greatly received

[JillonlineHV]

Hi,

My name is Jill and I use to be a midwife but have been a health visitor for over 30 years. I used to work for the NHS but have been working privately for the last few years. I'm new to nappyvalley but have a son and daughter-in law who live in Balham who have persuaded me to sign up to initially offer some FREE support. Your midwife may be a able to sort out your concerns but if she can't please feel to ring me on 07918 100674 or email me on
jill.irving@hobbayne.com

If you want to check me out have a look out at my website www.norfolkhv.com

If I don't hear from you good luck.

[Kate_O]

I am a mom of 2 beautiful girls. When I was pregnant for the first time I was sure I wanted to breastfeed and I didn't think I need to prepare for it. Now I know that it is so not true! I had problems, my daughter didn't want to suck and I failed I gave her a bottle and she didn't want to eat my milk. When I was pregnant with my second daughter I knew I need to be prepared for this task. My dear friend told me about Susan Urban's guide "How to make breastfeeding pleasant and easy" ( if anybody needs it I got it here www.parental-love.com ). She said it is great because she knew exactly what to do when she had problems. She told me that I should read it so I did. And she was right! This guide is awesome! Helped me so much with breastfeeding. I was confident and knew how to deal with problems. Every new mom or mom to be should read it. Such a great help!

[Drinou1889]

Hello,
I saw your post and it brought back memories that made me want to write back. Firstly congratulations on giving birth to such a healthy baby. I have two children. The first one I struggled to breastfeed (in retrospect my fault for trying to do a routine too early) but boy it was hard. The second one, I threw all the books to the bin and did on demand. It was wonderful. I should have done a bottle with the first but I felt brainwashed to be honest. What I am trying to say is as long as your baby is fed and everybody is happy, nothing else matters. I was breastfed myself and although I have done well, I am not a genius and I don't look like Gisele. In fact, out of curiosity I asked several of my peers what they were fed as babies and success/beauty/health seems irrelevant to whether or not they were bf. Bf is wonderful when it works but it should not leave you distressed. I do admire you for trying and if you want help, go straight to a lactation consultant. A few of my friends got Clare Byam Cooke (sorry spelling might not be accurate) to help and she is the bees knees according to them. Whatever you do, very best of luck to you and do not let anything distress you or get in the way of what you have with your baby. You can't get that time back. I hope this helped x

[pie81]

I would highly recommend Geraldine Miskin - she's an independent lactation consultant who will come to your house or advise over Skype. She was spot on in diagnosing my breastfeeding difficulties (different with each child) and in suggesting how to solve or mitigate them. Really knows her stuff.

[MGMidget]

I really rate Clare Byam Cook and she is local, based in Putney. You can visit her at her home or she can come to you for a higher fee. Good luck.

[TCEarlsfield]

The NCT breastfeeding drop-in at the Gooseberry Bush Cafe should be near you, and I found it brilliant, really helpful.

[lalectrice]

The Clapham La Leche League group are brilliant - supportive, kind and helpful (and free!). Run by accredited lactation experts they can offer individual advice or you can attend the weekly group drop-in. Google them or PM me for more info. They have a Facebook page too.

[SJ1979]

Another vote for Clare Byam-Cook, I was so close to giving up, and had SO many problems breastfeeding that I had to express all my feeds for several weeks which wasn't easy, but after a personal visit from Clare, I b'fed my daughter till around 11 months. I also highly rate her book and give it to all my expectant friends. Also go along to breastfeeding support groups in your local area, if you can, which I also found helpful.
Best of luck, you're not alone, and believe me when you crack it, it's so rewarding and worth persevering with.

[lifechanger]

I would highly recommend Siobhan Pearce 07734 236839. She is a fantastic lactation consultant who was hugely supportive and a real pleasure to have during what can be a stressful and emotional time.

[AVrilG88]

I am a mom of 2 beautiful girls. When I was pregnant for the first time I was sure I wanted to breastfeed and I didn't think I need to prepare for it. Now I know that it is so not true! I had problems, my daughter didn't want to suck and I failed I gave her a bottle and she didn't want to eat my milk. When I was pregnant with my second daughter I knew I need to be prepared for this task. My dear friend told me about Susan Urban's guide "How to make breastfeeding pleasant and easy" ( if anybody needs it I got it here http://www.parental-love.com ). She said it is great because she knew exactly what to do when she had problems. She told me that I should read it so I did. And she was right! This guide is awesome! Helped me so much with breastfeeding. I was confident and knew how to deal with problems. Every new mom or mom to be should read it. Such a great help!

I love this guide! It is a great collection of information on breastfeeding, thanks for sharing the title.

[Mumabean17]

Hi ladies,
Just want to say thank you so much for replies & your tips and advice is really reassuring when you are sucked into the newborn vortex.
We have had a lot of support from our visiting midwife this week and tried with shields and I actually booked into see Clare Byam-Cooke yesterday at her home in Putney following recommendations. Sadly Clare also struggled to get him to feed... she tried everything but we couldn't get him to latch and suck properly (he just wasn't having any of it!) and wasn't creating any suction & then just ends up using my nipple as a comforting dummy & then getting distressed as he wasn't getting anything. Again it's hard as I am producing plenty of milk & you do just take for granted that you will be able to feed your suckling baby in this idealistic picture you have in your head so I still can't help but feel disappointed. She said we could try the tongue tie option as a last resort but she wasn't really sure that would make a difference as his isn't that obvious. I did leave feeling very emotional and disappointed (I couldnt help it) but now have to decide whether we keep with the breast milk pumping, feeding, stearalising thing or go to formula. I know that as long as he is fed and is healthy then that is most important (he is taking in a lot!) but despite all the advice there is still a part of you that thinks should I keep trying, especially when people tell you to keep with it and 'they found it tough too but it will click in'. Either way thanks again for the recommendations, it is much appreciated

[lemondrizzles]

Hi there, I live in Wimbledon also. I found the breastfeeding drop in session in Worcester park great. There are a few around. The health visitor and mid wife have info.

I had a similar issue. Son would sort of latch and then not get any milk. This went on for weeks. By second / third week, we were instructed to top up with formula as baby was losing too much weight.

I kept going to the sessions though.

I read somewhere it can take up to six weeks for baby's latch to properly establish.

I was never confident baby was ever getting any milk from me. I produced loads (in addition to formula, I was instructed to also pump and bottle feed the pumped milk). He would suck for ages, easily up to an hour. Then around the three month mark things improved.

Do what's best for you and hopefully things work out

[twomonkeys]

another vote for Clare Byam-Cooke, she's so sensible and kind. good luck x

[Fisherprice]

Oh bless, breastfeeding is so hard it's like a dark art. I'm up to my second child and I had massive problems with both. I've learned so much I could be a lactation consultant myself.I do envy those who have a baby that bobs right on.

in my 2 children I've had : Firstborn: couldn't latch at all so exclusively pumped for 3 months. She was "fake sucking" and didn't gain weight leading to milk supply issues that meant I had to work on increasing milk. With my second we've battled tongue tie, thrush, finger feeding, mangled bleeding nipples, Reynards & vasospasm. You name it, I've experienced it first hand and overcome it.

So first things first, week one is really early days and 99% of mums struggle so don't feel like you're the only one going through this. Also, if you want to feed formula that's totally fine! I got post natal depression with my first because I was so stressed about breastfeeding and even though we got there in the end it totally wasn't worth it. Your baby needs a happy mum - he doesn't need breast milk no matter what the marketing says. My first born got only breast milk for 12 months and now eats nothing but crisps and chocolate!

It is great that you are getting support but I'd suggest you pick one person and work with them because continuity images a difference. If you consult with 5 lactation consultants I guarantee you'll get 5 different pieces of advice which won't help.

I also worked with Clare Bryant Cook with my second and She couldn't help me. I'm now working with Katherine fisher who I wish I had found sooner. You need to visit her in Croydon but its worth it. we had a tongue tie corrected at 5 days and Katherine identified that it hadn't been fully released. She's a midwife of 30 years and is literally the oracle on all things breastfeeding.

My baby is almost 8 weeks and we are just starting to get there but I still take it 1 feed at a time. Feel free to pm me if you want to ask anything or just need moral support. I know this struggle can feel very alone.

Big hugs