Sharing childcare with a friend but she is just putting them in front of TV all day Post Reply

[BenandJerry]

 I have arranged to box and cox childcare for 3 weeks of the school holidays with a school mum friend. Alternate days for 2 days each a week. Yesterday my daughter complained that she didn't want to go because they don't anything when they are there apart from watch tv all day. I know that the weather hasn't been great but I had assumed that when we each looked after the other's children there would be some element of supervision and encouragement to play etc. I have had them baking, taken them out for ice cream etc. Am I being unrealistic to expect similar in return and if I'm not how can approach the subject without causing offence? I will be high and dry for childcare if she does.

[Love lipstick]

Playdates do vary in my experience but if it is going to be a 3 week long swap and you have agreed it on a childcare basis then I would probably be tempted to say something but maybe say it indirectly.

They had loads of energy yesterday you might need to take them to the park to let off some steam or if you say you've done some baking, send them home with a few cakes or biscuits so that they show off what they have done. Some parents don't have the same creativity, not criticising they just might need some ideas to inspire them.

[ILMK]

Annoying but it’s only 6 days in total and you’re already someway through it so I’d consider sucking it up and not repeating again.. your daughter could also not be liking it for other reasons and so is pushing on something she knows would annoy you to get her out, but regardless she’s clearly not having a great time.

If she’s old enough then you could also encourage her to raise her own voice and ask the other family if she can do something else, like play games or go outside - a request like that coming from a guest would likely prompt the other family to take action.

[northLondoner]

If you had particular requirements or expectations for your free childcare they should have been discussed before you made the agreement….
I think you need to ask yourself, if she’d said at that point, “I’m super busy and just to warn you I won’t be able to do anything like home baking or the park” would you still have gone ahead anyway?

As it is, it’s only one day a week for three weeks. I would suck it up. And please don’t attempt to send home baker treats back as some kind of hint that your standards are higher than hers and she should up her game. At best the hint will be ignored and at worst she will see right through it and be very irritated.

[keep busy]

Agree with last poster no cake hints :) Its been convenient for you and not sure how old the children are but maybe your daughter can take books or activities with her or something she likes to do.
As long as they're safe. getting bored can happen, they learn how to self occupy, use imagination.

[MVM]

Depends...
Did you discuss babysitting or entertaining/activities.

Maybe one to learn from for next time.

If you do say something, please be kind but direct. Beating around the bush never helps anyone.

[Schoolquestions]

Just keep them at home and at least you can control what they watch! I would not appreciate my kids spending tv time unsupervised in someone else’s house on a regular basis.