Is this what your nanny is thinking ? Post Reply

[livegreen]

This is from Saturday's Guardian, entitled

What I'm Really Thinking - The Nanny.

I try not to judge you, the parents, but I can't help it. When you interviewed me, you talked about how you and your partner like the children to eat healthily. Arriving at work, I find them eating chocolate biscuits at 7am. There are tears and tantrums over breakfast, with you begging them, unsuccessfully, to finish their cereal. Thankfully you leave for work and our day can begin.

Your children are bright, funny and articulate, and you don't even know it. You assume they'll be intelligent, but you've never wondered how this will come about: when they try to interact with you, you're too busy. Meanwhile, you've farmed out their intellectual, social and moral development to someone you pay less per hour than your cleaner.

You look down on me, perhaps wondering why I choose to spend my days entertaining small children while you commute to your job in the City. You forget I have a master's degree and speak three languages, though it was on my CV. You see how much your children adore me, how I am a massive part of their world, and you resent it; but you have made your choices. No one is forcing you to drive a new BMW or have a holiday in the Maldives. When my own children were small, we had a battered Astra and a week in a caravan in Kent. It's all about priorities, and you have made yours clear.

All I can do is give your children the love, respect and stimulation they so desperately need. That, I promise you, is the best job in the world

[amybelle79]

Ouch!!

Maybe child care isn't the right profession for this lady? She seems to think so little of her employers.

Maybe its time to put those three languages to better use?

[supergirl]

Well said!

[sparkletiger]

Sounds pretty observant to me

[Souza]

Sounds pretty on the mark to me too....

[NJE]

I'm a nanny myself and I don't think that nannying is the
Right job for her. I can see where she is coming from, there are a few parents out there I wouldn't work for but still, you just don't talk like this. It's none of her business where the family goes on holiday to, what car they drive and about the salary: if she was happy when she accepted the job (which she was or she was just desperate) then she shouldn't complain now
About it. also of course she is earning less than the cleaner, a cleaner is self-employed and pays her own tax. She is employed, probably full-time while the cleaner might be there for only a few hours.

Oh what I think about my emPloyers? Only the best. I couldn't have a nicer family to work for.



Nadine (writing from my phone - sorry for the spelling!)

[falconmum]

I dont think there is any point in judging her or generalising the article. It is written by a specific person on a specific situation(that I am assuming!)

We all have reasons of doing what we do and in most instances , that is why nannies have the jobs they have. A lot of us struggle to make ends meet because we want our kids to only have the BEST !
I am assuming this is one nanny venting because of a super rich family who probably look down upon her and do not appreciate her contribution to their children's lives !

[freshairmum]

Nicely put falconmum.

However, it still grates somehow to read it!

[freshairmum]

The original post I mean, not yours falconmum!

[falconmum]

Freshmum, i thought so !!!

[piper_halliwell]

@ NJE
Don't judge, please!
How do you know that she is employed anyway? She could be self-employed too.
And who gave you the idea that a nanny should get paid less than a cleaner if both are live-out?
If the parents appreciate their nanny they should pay her a decent wage. Sadly, some rich people don't appreciate their nannies because they probably think something along the lines of "if she doesn't want the job there are plenty of others who would take it and not complain about pay, hours etc.".
You agree with feeding the kids chocolate biscuits at 7AM then.

[Hatsmum]

So she's jealous in three languages. Whoopydoo.

[piper_halliwell]

@ amybelle79
Either that OR you need to get off you high horse and try to put yourself in this woman's shoes and look at it from a different perspective, if you can!
Or are you in the "driving BMW and holidaying in the Maldives" club?
And maybe you feed your kids chocolate biscuits at 7AM too? And you also pay your nanny less than your cleaner? Provided you have either or both of those, that is. And I bet you don't spend more than 48 hours per week with your kids while they are awake...
This was me judging you without knowing you and your family or your circumstances at all. Doesn't feel good, does it!
So don't judge others!
You don't know her circumstances or what the people she works for are like. And maybe, just maybe, she is a nanny because she loves what she does and, she loves the kids she spends her days with. What difference does it make if she likes the parents or not. She doesn't live there.
@ Hatsmum
How do you know she's jealous? Are you a very powerful psychic who can read someone's feelings through a (copy-pasted) letter?

[flowergarden]

Hi!
I have worked as a Nanny for 4 years and I have been really lucky with 2 of my families, they were very kind, appreciative, reliable and just a pleasure to work for, but I have also seen a different kind of parent and I must say it took away a big chunk of my confidence and happiness. After reading the article my first response was this:

... Oh just to complete my anger on these type of families once and for all...she forgot to write about not getting paid on time, the correct amount or at all. And if you do get paid you have to wait up to 30min longer just because they 'forgot' to take out the money, it is then counted before your eyes with the comment :"That is correct isn't it?" After a 16h + day you then have to be polite and say: " We agreed on something slightly different." after which the minutes of the week are counted whilst the children scream for their mummy.
She forgot to mention that these type of 'privileged british' families are expecting you to do all the cleaning for the whole family as well as the childcare. She forgot to mention that you have to visit other 'strange' families with very loud and aggressive children for play-dates so that you have to look after 9 children not just three, whilst the mums sit and eat expensive food and talk about their cleaning ladies and behind their 'so called friend' backs.
She also forgot to mention that the creepy dads don't even get kisses from their children because they do not remember this man with a loud voice and a glass of wine in their hand.
She also forgot to mention the 100 times the mums go to the spa, massage therapists, shops and gyms in order to look great before coming to you for advice on their evening dresses and shoes only so that the husband can say to them : "This is what you are wearing?" before leaving their children for another 5h. And last but not least they forget how much time you spend with their children and how amazing their children are they forget how much the children love you and how much you love them, they don't care if the children are sad or crying when you finally get fired because the mums get upset when the children say: 'I love you ' to their Nanny...

...Now that I have given it 30min to sink in I am back to my usual smiley self and I still love working with children, but please do not underestimate what some Nannies have to go through, some have a hard time speaking English, they are often miles away from their families and loved ones, I have even met a Nanny who had to leave her own child in her country and work over here to pay for his food and education. I have met Nannies who could not look after their own children because they did not have enough money, instead they had to put their children into a daycare center and look after other peoples children.

My advice coming from my own experience is: try to work for an Australian, German or Swedish Familiy. They pay you on time, they make sure you get a paid holiday, they are paying the right amount of taxes and they are fun to be with.

Avoid! British families with a history in finance and banking, avoid families living in big houses where the decor is only beige, white and grey!

Thank you for your time...I hope this was helpful to anyone. x

Oh, and check out the film "The Nanny" it is VERY close to reality.

[kiwimummy]

I hope my nanny doesn't think this of me. they may not get chocolate biscuits, but there's usually a serious amount of nutella at 7am in our kitchen. alas, my husband was raised on it and thinks it is actual food.

Seriously, it sounds like the story is an individual one relating to an particular nanny and family and nothing more. It's not very helpful the way the newspaper presents it as something universal.