Elective c-section - 2nd pregnancy Post Reply

[marypoppins]

I had an unpleasant , long drawn out first labour which narrowly missed being a c section and was terrified when the second was due. Quite late in the pregnancy I chanced on a midwife who talked my experience through with me and alleviated some of my concerns for labour . After this I was much more relaxed and felt less scared . The next experience was totally different (the baby was the right way round to start with which helped) and I had two more. No comment on whether you should or shouldn't have elective c section-there's a whole minefield of safety considerations either way but really wanted to say that it was so traumatic and I was so distressed and a few kind words and some explanations went long way to help. I've come across the Birth Trauma Association in recent years who support women like yourself and also those who have unfortunately lost children and there is also LIFE charity that provide free counselling for any pregnancy related issues for anyone affected including partners. I'm sorry that midwife upset you, there is support out there for you. I hope that your fear stop doesn't stop you you from enjoying your pregnancy and I hope everything goes safe and well for you.

http://www.birthtraumaassociation.org.uk

[sandraletitia]

SO many things I want to say - first, I wouldn't recommend ANYONE watch One Born Every Minute as it is edited in such a way that it does not represent reality. I can fully understand why women view the thought of labour with horror after being bombarded with such negative images. In the first series there was one episode that focused on women going through transition - the bit when the brain feels for a short while it can't cope so it all feels different - mostly this is far more distressing for an unprepared birth partner than the woman herself. In isolation it looks scary but it is a SHORT interlude. It means progress is being made and the woman will start pushing her baby out very soon.
Secondly, be assured the rules on Caesarean Section have not changed as women have always been able to ask for a Caesarean. that was a mis-represented in the media.
Third, all hospitals are working towards reducing their Caesarean rate as there are risks and the figures have climbed too high so reducing the numb er of repeat Caesareans is a place to start. At Kingston all women are seen by the Consultant Midwife, others, such as C and W, have a VBAC clinic and I am sorry to hear someone had a bad experience - don't put up with it. Some units now offer hypnosis, counselling, and other approaches.
There is a Natal Hypnotherapy CD for women who know they are having one, to help prepare and calm them so helping with bonding and recovery.
For the vast majority of women birth can be an empowering experience but whatever anyone's beliefs and wishes, you should feel listened to. .
All the best.

[windmill26]

The first midwife I had told me when I asked about having a C-section "don't be silly ,women in Africa go back to work straigt after having given birth!".
That was the last time I saw her.I had a private C-section,was expensive but to me was worth every penny!

[schoolgatesmum]

There's a great website called Tellmeagoodbirthstory which is all about normal women who have had great births (some of which had c sections first). It can also put you in touch with women who have had similar experiences.

[SFMC]

Hmmm I wonder if that midwife who quipped about African women going straight back to 'work' after giving birth also gave thought to maternal and infant death rates in Africa!

When it comes to giving birth for a second time after having required an emergency c-section for your first baby, it should be about giving you the tools to make an informed decision, and an opportunity to speak to various 'experts' about your options and find out about risks associated with each, ask your questions and also discuss your fears. But in the end I feel it should be YOUR decision.

Agree with previous comment that you should also feel listened to.... NOT bullied.

Please keep us posted! I had an emergency c-section so am interested to hear of your experience!

[edam]

Another update from me...

Had an appointment with my obstetrician on Thursday and he has decided I can bypass the psychiatric assessment which is a relief. The next stage is to have another appointment with him at 36 weeks to discuss vbac again (with him, not a witch midwife) and possibly book the c-section.

So fingers crossed things will work out... although my sister in law had her first baby this w/e - home birth, 8 hours start to finish, minimal damage 'downstairs'... makes me feel robbed last time, and like I should try vbac, but the fear just takes over

[Latcherie]

I reckon you should write to them about the nasty midwife too. There are some amazing midwives out there, but one bad one can really upset you at a very vulnerable time, and they need to be aware of that...so much for empathy!
It's like the breast-feeding push...yes, it is best, if you can, and healthiest, but lots of women can't, or if they don't want to and are making an informed, suprted and fully educated choice, leave them alone! I have a friend who was in acute care for 3 weeks after a very bad time giving birth, her newborn was not fed for the first 2 days because her mk hadn't come in yet and the midwives and nurses refused to give the poor hungry mite a bottle....dangerous. At last both mum and baby were so upset that a nurse took piy and gave him a bottle, but asked the mum not to tell.
Another friend was had MRSA and was in barrier nursing post-op and was refused proper pain killers because they insisted, even in agony, that she breastfeed. Couple of bottles and healing mum...or stessed, agonised mum battling to produce milk with screaming hungry newborn...hmmmm, no choice to my mind.

[carrakane]

what an awful experience you've had!! sending you hugs!

I had emergency c-section at St George's with baby 1 and I INSISTED on having a planned c-section with baby 2. I couldn't be happier with my decision. If you know what you want - stick to it. Be insistent, very insistent with your consultant. I did not back down and basically had to argue my way for a C-section date. Turns out my baby was huge so the dr in the theatre told me it was a good thing I was having a c-section, as I would never have been able to deliver him!

YOU ARE IN CHARGE of your body. Maybe you can get your partner or friend to go with you next time and agree a plan of action for what you want. I know from my experience that I could not get a date until I was 32 weeks. But we got there in the end. Wishing you all the best for the result that you want. Hang in there.

[Bluebutterfly]

Hi, just thought that I'd add on to this post as had very similar first time birth experience to you Edam - very long labour resulting in emercency c-section and failed epidural so ended up with general anaesthetic when the last attempt at an epidural wore off as they were stitching me up! I had an elective c-section in December and it was an incredibly positive experience. Personally speaking, there's something about having 10 people in a room who are all doing everything to make sure that you and your baby are ok that makes me feel very safe and happy. I don't think c-sections are an easy option - the recovery can be easy or painful and complicated depending on the circumstances - just as with a vaginal birth - but it has to be your choice at the end of the day. I'm very pleased that the doctors seem to be listening to your wishes. I had a very stressful couple of weeks when every midwife/doctor/sonographer that I saw insisted that I would have to have a VBAC for my twins, even though that would have been very high-risk (as they shared a placenta) and in spite of the fact that I was very clear I wanted a c-section. Eventually I saw the consultant who immediately suggested that I had a c-section before I even said anything and it made me so cross that I had to wait so long to get that confirmation.

Anyway!! The main reason I was posting was to say that I was given an appointment with the anaesthatist at St Thomas' (quite early on in my pregnancy) to discuss the fact that the epidurals had failed for my first labour. She then put in my notes that I should be given a spinal block for my elective c-section. I just wanted to say that you make want to ask to speak to the anaesthatist at some point about that? I have to say that I was incredibly impressed with St T's for all aspects of antenatal and postnatal care and I really hope that everything goes well for you.

[chg77]

I had an emergency caesarean with my 1st baby and after a bit of deliberation, a VBAC with my second, both at St Georges.
I know everyones story is different, but for the record, I had a very positive experience. Perhaps I was lucky, but it was a 5 hour labour, I only had gas and air and admittedly a few stitches but nothing horrendous. I had a wonderful student midwife and I am so so glad I did it. For me it was totally empowering, a real achievement and help heal a few of the mental scars from the emergency c-section.
Good luck! I'm sure you'll make the right decision for you.
x

[Soon-to-be-a-SMOG]

I wanted an elective with number 2 after a crash section (under general anaesthetic) following a 3 day labour with my first.

I was made to undertake a course on the pros of VBAC vs Csec, but the next availabale course wasn't until I'd have been 39 weeks pregnant. I ended up in tears and completely terrifed / stressed about ti all, so managed to get a one-to-one chat instead of the course .....

The girl doing the course started with "I know csections are seen as very glamorous" to which I intercepted that there was nothing remotely glamorous at being out cold on an operating tabel as your child is pulled from you before taking 4 hrs to come round and missing the first precious moments of her life.

She then changed tack and moved onto "I've been travelling, I've seen women in Africa giving birth outside". Fabulous, I imagine their neonate mortality rates are a little higher than ours too.

It was torture to get my elective, they then hinted they'd make me wait until 40 weeks "or later" to get one. I eventually got one at 39 weeks, and as events turned out it was an absolute necessity, and the surgeon doing it commented (without knowing my history) that he could see why I could never have had a natural labour.

Sometimes, I must admit, I do wish I'd attempted a VBAC though, so I get why they want you to think long and hard - but not to cause such upset in doing so .

[Scotland]

Eden, I'm intrigued, why did you refuse a ventouse on your first birth? I had this on my third birth (in an emergency situation) and it did the trick no problem. I've had very positive natural birth experiences (at C&W) so I would listen to the medical staff. Have confidence in them and their advice. I know you're at a different hospital but I was totally on the NHS, midwife led and they were wonderful. They brought in doctors when needed.

[CB13]

I'm sorry I didnt post earlier. I would have said to avoid the vbac consultation. I had a c section with my first and natural birth with my second. Natural birth was better but that is because my first c section, although planned, was not my first choice of birth. I find the vac ladies are totally ill-informed (as opposed to midwives). I had a c section because my daughter was OP; she had no chance of getting into the right position unless she turned herself. Two weeks later, she hadn't turned or engaged so my obstetrician booked me in. When I told the nurse on my second pregnancy she said "what a terrible shame, I would have given you a nice home birth..." as if a) I regretted the c section - I didn't and b) that home birth might have resulted in the death of me or my daughter. Stupid cow! I was livid.

You do what is right for you. Personally I preferred the natural birth but the most important thing is a safe delivery for you an your baby.

[topmama]

Hi, thought I would share my story...as another view.

My first was an average length 1cm an hour ish with an epidural but once i was fully dilated the baby's heart beat slowed down so after abit of pushing, failed forceps and ventouse, I ended up with an emergency c-section.

For my second I really wanted to have a more natural birth so asked for the VBAC appointment. At the appointment the midwife took my history and explained that since I fully dilated, relatively easily the first time round but the problem appeared to be with the baby's positioning it was likely that I would not need a C-section. I was really pleased to hear this, however she still booked me in for a c-section a couple of days after my due date, which I wasn't so pleased about and I had to push for it to be booked for 40weeks+3day.

Fortunately for me, I went into labour on the due date, arriving at the hospital at midday 8cm dilated (too late for an epidural!) gave birth 2 hours later and was home by 8pm. Much easier than the first and with no need to stay in hospital.

I was really please to have had the birth I wanted second time round but once the babies were born the birth experiences faded and having a healthy baby was the most important thing. In my experience you can try to have the birth you want but it doesn't always work out that way.

[edam]

Thanks for sharing advice and experiences ladies, really helpful and supportive.

I had a midwife appointment this week and my baby is lying in exactly the same position as my first - on the left hand-side, so would likely go back to back if labour started spontaneously. This makes me feel slightly stronger about wanting another c-sec. I've got another appointment at end of September so will post another update then.

Just to answer an earlier post directed to me from 'Scotland', I refused forceps for the following reasons:
- my daughter was only 3/5ths engaged - when I first got to hospital they couldnt even see her head she was so far up
- my daughter was back-to-back, meaning they would try to turn her, pull her down and then out
- I was given a 25% chance of the forceps working - logically, if there was 75% chance of having a c-section, I wanted to get on with it
- my daughter's heart rate was erratic and I was petrified of loosing her - I wanted the quickest route out for her
- I had been in a slow painful labour for over 48hours and quite frankly wanted the experience over and to know my baby was safe, rather than her being yanked out by her head

I find it really negative when people question the choices of mothers in labour, everyone's experience is so utterly unique. I congratulate anyone who is able to give birth naturally or vbac, I wish my experience had ended the same way.