Advice needed from live-in Nannies

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KiwiAmanda
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Advice needed from live-in Nannies

Postby KiwiAmanda » Wed Jan 23, 2013 4:58 pm

I am just about to start the search for a live-in Nanny to look after my 2 daughters (currently 2.5yrs and 1yr), the eldest of which goes to nursery 3 mornings a week. Bias aside, I consider my kids to be very well behaved and happy kids and are both really good sleepers.

My husband and I are planning to go to a friend's wedding in Bali for 9 days (Fri morning to the following Saturday evening including travel time) at the end of April and it was suggested it would be better if everyone left their children at home. Any feelings about that aside, we are hoping the nanny would look after them full-time while we are gone.

As a live-in nanny, how would you feel about this? What set-up would you expect? How much would you expect to get paid on top of the weekly salary?

All suggestions welcome (except taking children and nanny!) as I want to make sure everyone is happy. We live on a very friendly street with lots of similar aged kids and lots of help on hand if needed.

Many thanks.
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mrsbfrombalham
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Re: Advice needed from live-in Nannies

Postby mrsbfrombalham » Wed Jan 23, 2013 5:02 pm

I can't help as such - but I am very jealous about your holiday to Bali kids-free with your husband. Enjoy
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calgary
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Re: Advice needed from live-in Nannies

Postby calgary » Wed Jan 23, 2013 5:50 pm

We have a live-out nanny but we've taken her on vacations and it's been great all round. We've had her look after the boys first thing in the morning and then in the afternoon through evening.

Is this an option for you on this trip - bringing your kids and the nanny along? I know it would be quite expensive with the extra 3 tickets and extra rooms as well. Just a thought. Otherwise, some resorts offer temp nannying services as well.

I'm sure someone with a live-in nanny will offer some options...
Have fun!
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nanny_kitty
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Re: Advice needed from live-in Nannies

Postby nanny_kitty » Wed Jan 23, 2013 10:32 pm

Hi,

I'm a live-in nanny and regularly proxy parent for my boss when she's away on business. However, I look after school age children who never wake in the night.

As looking after little ones for this period of time is a huge responsibility, I would encourage you to discuss this with your nanny to see if she is happy to do this in the first place. If you were to get a temp you'd be paying them an hourly rate for the overnight, but as she would be live-in I'm sure an amount for the night would be more appropriate. There is no need to increase her daytime rate as she'd be doing this whether you were there or not.

As for an appropriate amount for the overnight, I would do some research online, and also have a chat with her. I know that a little generosity on the employer's part is always much appreciated when you are asked to do something a little unusual. It also depends on her experience and how often the children are likely to get up during the night. Paying her a little extra is bound to be a great deal more cost effective than taking everyone to Bali!

Also, you could give her the option of the days in lieu for perhaps either immediately after you get back (she'll probably want a break!) or to tag on to her next days off for a longer break. That is of course if you are offering her lieu time - you could always pay her extra to not take the days off. That might appeal to her - all nannies are different!

I hope some of that helps! Enjoy Bali :)
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stayathomemuminsw11
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Re: Advice needed from live-in Nannies

Postby stayathomemuminsw11 » Wed Jan 23, 2013 11:07 pm

Hi,

Wow, lucky you!

I have been on both sides-I was a nanny (live in and out) during university holidays, and I now have 2 children aged nearly 4, and 11 weeks, although we don't have a nanny I do have a little bit of help with them.

Anyway, my advice would be, it's a VERY long time for one person to be in charge of 2 kids with no break at all, so, I would offer the following:

1 night of the 9 for your nanny to go out with a friend or whatever for the evening and book your usual babysitter (if you have one). Your nanny could always say she's fine to be there all 9 nights but I'd definitely offer this!

Some extra cash for a couple of takeaways (whether she chooses to use the money for takeaways is up to her, but it's a nice gesture)

Agree on specific times you would like to speak to the children, if you feel they're old enough to be happy with this

I would ask the nanny if she would like to have 1 of her friends to stay for 1 night, as I think 9 nights alone could be pretty lonely-however make it clear it is only for one night, and meet the friend first!

RE salary, I agree I don't think it is necessary to up her daily rate, but I would imagine you will need to give her a fair amount per night. Agencies usually suggest £100 ish per night for a temp night nanny, but obviously you don't need to give her that much given she'll be working for you during the day... It's a tough one to work out actually.

Good luck, hope that helps a bit.
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stayathomemuminsw11
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Re: Advice needed from live-in Nannies

Postby stayathomemuminsw11 » Wed Jan 23, 2013 11:24 pm

Also, just a couple of other points to think about...

What happens if your nanny gets ill and can't look after the kids? You will need some kind of backup plan-and also she needs to have a couple of people she can call on if this happens-obviously if it's something minor like a cold she will just have to get on with it (!) but anything where she really can't look after them could cause problems...

You also need to think about if, God forbid, anything were to happen to your children whilst you were away-would you be comfortable for her to make decisions on your behalf if you couldn't be contacted (if, for instance, your child needed an operation) I obviously don't want to scare you, and it is highly unlikely, but if it were me, I'd want to have discussed this...
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irap
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Re: Advice needed from live-in Nannies

Postby irap » Thu Jan 24, 2013 12:23 am

Hi There!

We have a live in nanny and when we went away to Paris once for two nights we gave her an extra 50 pounds per night she stayed. Normally she is off at 8:00 and we get the little guy ready for school and take him and she picks him up at 12:30.. but now she had to do the morning shift and come to the rescue if he were to cry at night.. Also, a friend of mine went away for 6 days to dubai and she asked me if it was ok to ask my nanny if she wanted to work the weekend taking care of her kids from Saturday morning at 9:00 am till Sunday 7:00 pm when the children went to bed and her nanny did the other 4 week days, this way her nanny would get a break. My friend spoke to my nanny and offered her 180 pounds for the weekend and my nanny was super happy and did it. She saw it like a chance to get extra money since we never use her in the weekends and she actually had a nice evening with the other nanny ordering pizza and stuff when the kids were sleeping!

Just some ideas!
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hayfeversufferer
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Re: Advice needed from live-in Nannies

Postby hayfeversufferer » Thu Jan 24, 2013 8:02 am

Hi
Can I echo the comments for the "What If..." scenario?

I've been happy leaving mine overnight with nannies and very well trusted baby sitters but there has to be a clear (written) plan for what happens if...

For example, there is a piece of paper with three taxi numbers, money in an envelope for the taxi (this is kept seperate and sealed so it is always there), the address of chemists (24 hour one in Streatham), doctor and casualty AND a letter saying I am happy for her to make decisions on my behalf.

On top of that there is also a number for my best friend who lives around the corner.

If something happens and it is serious she is to go to hospital by taxi whilst calling my best friend (and me obviously).

That means there is a plan and although its a bit control freaky it know we wont have that awful "what do I do?" situation if something horrible happens.

hope this helps
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Almaceti
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Re: Advice needed from live-in Nannies

Postby Almaceti » Thu Jan 24, 2013 9:21 am

Hi, I know this is not what you are asking in your post but I just would like to say that I think 9 days in very long for children of that age without their parents. I left my eldest when if was nearly 2 years old for 13 days with my parents and parents in law and they told me that after about 5 days he really started missing us and the second week was just very difficult.
I had another experience with my second one, who I left for 6 days with my parents in law when he was just 1 year old and they told me he was exceptionnally quiet for the first 2-3 days and then he cried a lot at night; for the following 18 months he didn't want to go to their house again and never wanted to be left alone with my mother in law without me even for 5 minutes...
Since then I have not left them for more than a week; they are now 6 and 3 and we can talk on the phone which helps. but I think 1 week is still the maximum for the time being.
Sorry I don't want to ruin you holidays but if I were you I would shorten the trip slightly.
In respect of the organisation, I think you should choose someone who has some experience of staying with kids with full responsibility for several days, that you trust and who is happy to take that responsibility, but apart from that I wouldn't worry too much. Of course you should give the nanny all the means to make appropriate decisions; but if you plan all the "what if", you would never leave them....
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Zaczac
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Re: Advice needed from live-in Nannies

Postby Zaczac » Thu Jan 24, 2013 9:45 am

I also don't want to ruin your plan and I agree with previous
Posts that it's too long to leave your children with nanny.
Is there option to book a hotel with kids club? Or find a
nanny locally? This could be cheaper even.
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KiwiAmanda
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Re: Advice needed from live-in Nannies

Postby KiwiAmanda » Thu Jan 24, 2013 3:15 pm

Thank you all so much for your replies. They have all been incredibly helpful and insightful and just what I was after.

Thanks to the advice, I have made a start by asking the Godfather and his wife to stay here while we're gone and do the 'night-shift' so the kids have more familiar faces around (who they adore) and so the Nanny gets a break. They will also be the proxy parents so can be responsible for those 'what-ifs'.

I am also advising my husband that if he still insists for going for 9 days then he can but I am happy to cut my trip short by a few days. You are right, I would hate to think of the kids being upset and it would certainly not be conducive to having a relaxing time!

Thanks again.
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k2blues
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Re: Advice needed from live-in Nannies

Postby k2blues » Mon Jan 28, 2013 8:26 am

I have a live out nanny and on the days that she does an overnight stay on the weekend etc i pay her the maternity nurse rate of £150 for 24 hours.
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