Does Having a Manicure Make you a Better Mum? Post Reply

[MakeoversManicures]

But at the time you sent the response, you hadn't clicked through to the website by then. So why therefore have you made the assumption that those who don't are not good Mothers? And why have you accused those who do as shallow?

Surely, it's a personal choice. This is a huge guess here, so probably makes me as wrong as you are for making huge assumptions based on...er zero. Do you secretly evny those who do?

[sw11_]

MM - do you think maybe you should just let this go? I don't doubt that you feel aggrieved by the reception your initial post got, but you are not doing yourself or your business any favours by having a fight with another user in such a public forum.

[MrsAmanda]

LOL, I might envy the person who just won the Euromillions (and not even secretly), but no, I don't envy people who have manicures. My husband has been known to get his nails done, I feel no envy towards him or anyone else. However, I do say that I don't think having a manicure makes one a better parent. I didn't make that assumption, it was written (perhaps explictly, perhaps 'between the lines' on your original post). There were four other comments, plus your own second post before your post was edited. They were mostly agreeing with my feelings on the subject. You'll see from my profile that I've been a nvn member for a long time and contributed to a lot of posts. I've met lots of other members; my son goes to nursery with the children of other members. They'll probably all tell you I'm about as 'slummy' a mummy as they come. Manicures, tottering about in high heels, really not me!

To be honest, I have no idea at what time I first looked at your website, perhaps you'll remind me.

The 'shallow' comment came on the strength of the comment saying that it didn't have to be a manicure; it could be shoes or a pretty dress. All things which could be construed as material goods. ie, buying something 'pretty' for yourself will make you a better mother.

I'm off to do bath and bedtime for the boys, now. Whilst I've had a very entertaining afternoon, perhaps the thread will be locked by the time I get back.

I'm sure you've thought about this, but you're promoting your business here. Anyone googling it will find this thread. Is this what you want potential customers to see? I could carry this on as long as you like, but I really don't have much to lose ...

edited to delete the comments made by MM (sorry, Mungo) which I'd inadvertently included.

[dandelion53]

Oooh, I feel like having a manicure! I know!! I'll contact that really aggressive woman who posted on NVN to do it!.... Ha.

I do have occasional manicures and pedicures but I still find the initial post and question completely offensively worded. No, manicures do not make anyone a better mum! What you look like is completely irrelevant to your ability to be a mum, cope as a mum etc etc.

You suggest that 'what you see, reflects how you feel on the inside'. Now that may be the case for some people but it IS shallow because it deals only with the superficial and appearance alone (the definition of shallow). I would suggest that making time for yourself as a mother could also be about nurturing your personality and brain - seeing friends, reading a book, doing something that interests you. Some people will want to have pampering sessions, others not but it certainly doesn't mean that if you don't then you are putting yourself on the backburner! Not everyone sees appearance as the definition of self.

So, yes, looking after yourself as a person is important to your ability to be a good mother but, no, I dispute that having a manicure would achieve that except for the very shallow. I suspect that a woman suffering from PND who had a manicure would look nice but still feel pretty hollow on the inside unless she had addressed the bigger issues...

[Raspberry-Sorbet]

To MM:

Moops beat me to it with reference to the previous company who advertised a service for mummies in a well intentioned but misguided way. As Moops said, they apologised, agreed, re worded, everyone had a giggle about it and no doubt their business has not suffered in the slightest.

A certain Fitness instructor politely replied to the many complaints he had with grace yet was able to (again politely) stick to his guns about how good he said his service was (I am not a customer btw!) I don't think anyone would object to hear if he is doing well with his business.

Without wishing to sound condescending, everyone on here is a potential customer. The customer is always right and it is their prerogative to answer a subjective question how they please. If a potential customer or actual customer projects a negative comment, that can often be a blessing and a help with evaluating the service that one is offering. Therefore, I think by replying to Mrs A and others in the way you have is a mistake.

Think of it in the bigger picture - if you were pitching this in a challenge on the Apprentice, would you reply to Lord Sugar in that way?

The comments do not mean that you are not good at providing the service you do or that you don't have a good product. It's the branding and marketing that needs addressing. In particular, my personal opinion, is that you need a new strap line.

Good luck with the possible makeover of Makeovers.......

[mrsmrcd]

Your premise is absolutely ridiculous (and offensive), your responses on here are ill judged and aggressive - you're in the wrong for goodness sake, you should have just apologised and gone away! Unbelievable.. however I do love a good online bunfight so thanks for the entertainment, but I won't be booking a manicure with you and I very much doubt that anyone else reading this forum will either.

[AbbevilleMummy]

I actually spend a lot of money 'maintaining' myself when time affords (monthly beauty visits, highlights, cut and blow-dry every 6 wks, weekly manicures, copious products etc etc) and I do this not to make me a better mum (my daughter couldn't care less about my beauty regime!!) but to make me a better wife! No, but seriously, I've tried not to let having children impact my appearance too much and as I work in the City, I need to keep up appearances!

The point to this is that I'm probably your 'target customer', yet you couldn't have made me want to avoid your services more! Firstly, I found your attention-grabbing headline pathetic, not offensive, then followed by your extremely aggressive posts, I was amazed!

I think following these outbursts of yours, you may need to completely re-brand if you hope to ever get any customers in Nappy Valley!!

[MakeoversManicures]

Oh I see, this is Mrs A's and her nursery group friends website... Been on here for years with all her friends. I see too that the only person who was prepared to question her motivation was a new member.

I get it now.

Yes, Mrs Amanda, you're totally right... Every group has their leader and in this group I suspect that's you:0).

Oh just one other question before I go.

Is it okay to steal?

I guess that means, I agree with stealing.

X

[Raspberry-Sorbet]

Re above - way too far.....

I am on here as my real name. Most people are here under pseudonyms.

We don't know who each other are. Myself, I have had no previous contact with anyone on this thread apart from we may have commented on the same posts.

Mrs A could me my next door neighbour, or she could live 2 miles away, I have no idea. Likewise with the other posters. There are mums, dads, nannies, grannies on here, spanning the postcodes of SW4, 11, 12, 17, 18 and more I would think.

Annabel will tell you that there are over 14 000 members on this site and whilst it has a community feel, we are very much individuals.

For the record, I wrote what I did as a genuine piece of advice. I have real life experience of what I spoke about.

I will not grace any further replies from you with an answer due to the sheer rudeness although I do wish you well in your venture.

[dandelion53]

I've never met anyone from this website, let alone from this thread, such a childish response...

You originally posted about your services a few weeks ago and I remember reading it and being interested in what a Shellac manicure was. I didn't do anything further but other people might have. And possibly made a mental note to go back to the ad if ever interested. Your posts were viewed more than 100 times so you had a chance a bit of business being generated even though no one commented as there was no need. But having had no response you decided to return, I'm guessing to stir it up a bit and you've achieved that! But this post was now been viewed more than 400 times and I seriously doubt any of them will now be considering your services considering how rude you've been...

[MrsAmanda]

Oh for pity's sake, get a grip!

There is no clique. I am not a ringleader. I was just pointing out that I am a regular user of nvn (and have found it hugely helpful over the last two years, had lots of help from other members). Annabel organises regular coffee mornings, some of which I've been to and as is the nature of these things, met other nvn users. I know of two members whose children go to the same nursery as my son. There may be more, I have no idea. That's the beauty of the internet, its anonymity. However, there is a community feel. When my son lost his favourite teddy, I had so many offers of replacements and help to look for it, I was very touched.

Yes, it looks like the only person to 'question my motivation' or disagree with me was a new user who signed up just so they could comment.

As for your comment about agreeing with stealing, I've obviously too stupid to understand as I have no idea what you mean. And I'm certainly not going to waste any of my precious brainpower thinking about it.

[mrsmrcd]

I'm a new member! And I disagreed with you, so neh neh (pulls out tongue and wiggles beautifully manicured hands at MakeoversManicures)

[moops]

Like I said before it's so obvious this new member is either you or a friend of yours you've told to join to defend you. Who in their right mind would just randomly log on to NVN read this post, decide to join and spend their time going through Mrs Amandas posts? Very suspicious.

I can't believe what a hole you've dug for yourself here. I wish you luck, with your attitude and lack of business sense you are going to need it.

[MakeoversManicures]

I will not be bullied by Queen Bee (especially those who are prepared to lie to prove a point) and her coffee morning chums and will stand by all what I've said and here's why.

Mums currently have on average less than 20 minutes Me Time a day.

Mums are more stressed today than they were in the fifties.

Mums have on average a total of 38 negative thoughts about themselves a day.

So I will happily spend my time and efforts promoting Mummy Me Time at whatever cost.

I repeat! The nails are an analogy, just like the red lipstick, pretty dress or high heeled shoes. As the strap line states AND my initial post:

It is not about being a slave to fashion it's about Mums taking time out for themselves. In fact, my initial post mentions 'me time' on several occassions. My blog states, the nails, shoes and lipstick represents liberation and is to act as a reminder to Mums that they're are not last on the list.

Any mind professional, such as a Life Coach, NLP Practitioner, psychologist, wellbeing expert etc, will tell, what you see on the outside will directly impact on how you feel on the inside (google it).

I will continue my campaign for Mummy Me Time and from this, will make Mums aware that they may well indeed face opposition from other mums for choosing to spend time on themselves and be classed as superficial.
They are to ignore and carry on.

[mrsmrcd]

Hilarious!!