Matt Hancock at Wandsworth Pub Quiz.

Dear NappyValleyNetter,

Last week I wrote about (accidentally) using the dog’s lamb bone for gravy stock (read more).

To say that a few of you emailed to ask questions about this gross-out event would be an understatement.

So, to answer them all in one place, and in the interests of public hygiene because most of you will be cooking the Santa of all roasts later this week, here are the answers to the most common FAQ:

1. Is the story true? Yes it is.

2. Why was the dog’s lamb bone in the fridge? Because she hadn’t finished with it but when I removed it the daft mutt followed me around like a twin from The Shining, just sitting and staring and it got weird. I thought if I triple wrapped it in clingfilm and put it in the fridge then she would forget about it.

3. Why didn’t you label it? I didn’t think I needed to because who would want to use a dog’s bone apart from a dog and she can’t read.

A few of you then sent follow-up questions and so in the interests of total openness, yes I’m very aware of the dog sized gap in the logic of point 3.

I hope I haven’t put you off your Xmas dinner and all that’s left to say is have a fabby holiday and see you on the other side…

Here’s what you’ve been talking about this week on NappyValleyNet:

E.’s son attends a local state school and will soon sit a number of 11+ plus exams. Following a conversation with a friend E. asks do private schools take into consideration what type of school a child went to when looking at the scores achieved in the 11+? (read more)

M.’s problem of a permanently grumpy husband has been met with a Christmas sack load of sympathy from the NVN community, thanks everyone (read more).

Matt Hancock might not have won the latest series of I’m a Celebrity…Get Me Out of Here but according to R. he was part of the winning team at the Wandsworth East Hill pub quiz last week. His team name was allegedly Professor Quiz Whitty which, as R. says, has to be one of the kindest things he’s been called in a long time (read more).

Whilst we’re on the subject of annoying things we associate with Covid, B’s dilemma of whether to test for Covid before seeing friends (she has a hacking cough and a husband who doesn’t want a positive result to put the brakes on his social life) has received a positively enthusiastic response from the NVN community (read more).

Do you remember our story that Wandsworth will be one of the first councils to issue 20 mph fines? Well so far, according to RSC, the punishments are more the naughty step as opposed to nickels and dimes but that will probably change (read more).

‘YouBeYou’ posed the question: “How important do you think it is to teach young people life skills from an early age? Or is a sole focus on academia more important?” (read more)

C. is looking for a more traditional Church of England or Catholic Church in the area, with beautiful architecture, traditional music and welcoming to families. Does Nappy Valley have its very own Vicar of Dibley?! (read more)

A different B. is in need of an HR guru! Her son’s employer has informed staff that their offices will be closed between Christmas and New Year and that staff have to take these days off as holiday. B. wonders if this is legal, or should they go on strike? I might have added the bit about striking! (read more)

Talking of strikes, R. is wondering who they should be giving a Christmas tip to this year? R. isn’t planning on giving their postman anything this year as they’ve been striking. Top tip – if you want to receive a Christmas gift from R. don’t go on strike! (read more)

Another R. has posted a strike action calendar, all ready for you to print out and pin to the fridge! Thanks R.! (read more)

No need to get caught up in public transport and postal strikes when shopping for Christmas gifts this year. Take a look at our NappyValleyNet Christmas Gift Guide which has fab present ideas for everyone on your list, all suggested by the splendid local businesses of Nappy Valley (read more).

And if all you want for Christmas is a brand new tennis racket then talk to J. who has rackets in stock for all abilities and ages. Well, he says that but he hasn’t seen my backhand! (read more)

L. has hired a hall for a birthday celebration and is looking for someone to help with the serving of food and tidying up afterwards. Does anyone know of any websites or recommendations of anyone local who L. might be able to hire to help? (read more) I hear Matt Hancock is local and probs looking for a job.

K. is looking for a drop off service for Chesterton Primary School who can get her son to the school’s breakfast club, so K. can get herself to the school she teaches at in Brixton on time (read more). Don’t know if Matty H. has a driving licence but probs looking for a job.

The news about Wandsworth Council supporting plans to improve Burntwood Lane’s walking and cycling corridor has not been seen as a welcomed improvement by many of you who are local to the area (read more).

B. is in desperate need of an IT guru who can come and sort out the tech issues in their home that have arisen since moving from Virgin to Sky (read more) I don’t know if his tech skills go further than downloading Dating Apps but Monsieur Hancock is local and almost certainly looking for a job.

Sad news that Love Triangle has now closed in Balham. Love the story they posted on their Instagram page about the ride they’ve been on for the past 18 months (read more).

After the terrible news of a young man being mugged at knifepoint in Balham for his phone, cash and coat, D. suggests you’re careful about your brand of coat if you’re going to be walking alone (read more).

If it’s snowing in Nappy Valley you can be pretty sure it’s snowing in the Swiss Alps. If you’d like your youngster to experience a guaranteed winter wonderland take a look at Camp Suisse who will give your child the experience of a lifetime! (read more)

And if you’re keen to have your younger child learn some life skills whilst getting active, Playball London are taking bookings for their spring term (read more).

Looking ahead, mid-January will see the launch of our very popular annual NappyValleyNet Wellness & Well-being Guide. There’s currently an early bird discount so if your business is in the industry, and would like to be featured, please get in touch! (read more)

We have more House & Garden questions than Harry Kane has nightmares about THAT penalty

It’s been a turbulent few months with concerns about the cost of living, the energy crisis and political upheaval dominating the front pages. We spoke to our property partners to find out how a dramatic year in domestic and global politics has influenced the local housing market (read more).

Better get your skates on to be in with a chance of winning a £200 voucher from Clapham’s Michelin-starred restaurant Trinity courtesy of Roundhouse. The competition closes tomorrow! (read more) A. is looking for somewhere to rent for their family of five whilst they embark on building works (read more). L. is looking for a studio flat to rent (read more). Recommendations for F. who is wants a reliable company for carpet and soft furnishings cleaning (read more). Ludley Interiors are celebrating the festive season by giving one lucky person the chance to win a free 3D Room Design (read more). Wandsworth Council have some great tips for a greener Christmas (read more). And Lambeth Council also have tips for a sustainable Christmas and new year with when, where and how to recycle your Christmas tree and when bins will be collected over the festive period (read more).

A new home to kick 2023 off in?

For rent with Portico is a split-level 2-double bedroom flat off Clapham Common Northside, (read more). For sale with John Thorogood is a 2-bedroom split-level flat on Northcote Road (read more). For sale with Rampton Baseley is a 2-bedroom apartment with a large roof terrace in The 1840 award-winning development (read more). For sale with Marsh & Parsons is a semi-detached 5-bedroom set on a popular road between the commons (read more).

We have more Schools questions than Harry and Meghan have Netflix viewers!

C. is wondering how to decide between Broomwood, Hornsby House and Thomas’s schools? Having been to their Open Days they’re struggling to make a decision (read more). C. is considering purchasing a home on Manchuria Road and wonders if they’re likely to get into Belleville or Honeywell? (read more) Belleville Primary School is offering two further dates for parents/carers to visit the school in early January (read more). And Belleville Wix have a number of school tours running at the start of the new term (read more). Exceptional Academics will be running Saturday School classes for Year 5 students preparing for the 11+ come January (read more). There’s just a few spaces available on Hyde Tutoring’s 10+ and 11+ December revision courses (read more). Playhouse Playgroup in SW18 is now taking bookings for the spring term and also offers a trial day to those new to the playgroup (read more).

Situations Vacant

Local charity Paul’s Cancer Support is looking for a part-time Fundraising Manager to join a small friendly team (read more). Southfields Academy is looking for examination invigilators (read more). Temporary carer needed to help an elderly lady with her mobility (read more).

For sale

DFS Narnia sofa (read more). Children’s Masters golf clubs and bag (read more). Children’s MX20 bike (read more).

Love

Annabel and NappyValleyNet Team